Comparisons
by T'Pam
Summary: Final Chapter now up!! What would Tom's life had been like if he hadn't lied after Caldik Prime? Would telling the truth right from the start have made his life turn out any differently? Or would the comparison be relatively the same?
1. Chapter One

COMPARISONS  
By T'Pam  
  
  
Disclaimer: Voyager and all her crew belong to   
Paramount/Viacom. No copyright infringement is intended. No   
profit will be made, as this story is just for fun.  
  
Author's note: I wrote this little tale a couple of years ago   
and thought I'd share it with you.   
  
This is an AU story. What would Tom's life have been like if   
he hadn't lied after Caldik Prime? What would have happened   
if he'd told the truth, right from the start? Would his life   
have turned out any differently, or would he still be where   
he is now?   
  
I have taken the liberty (please don't take my head,   
Paramount - whoops, wrong program!) of using some direct   
dialogue from the pilot episode, 'Caretaker'. There is also   
a little taken from the episode 'Faces'. If you haven't seen   
either episode or the episodes in between them, you might   
find this a little confusing as I've left a lot out, assuming   
that you already know what happened.   
  
Codes: J&P, P/T.  
Rated PG-13 - for disturbing images.  
  
~^~  
  
Comparisons  
  
Part One  
  
Tom Paris pushed through the crowded, noisy room looking   
around desperately for an escape. Unfortunately, his father   
caught his eye and beckoned him over. 'Damn it!' Tom muttered   
to himself. The Admiral was standing with a group of Starfleet   
Admirals and Captains, and the last thing he felt like doing   
at the moment was facing a bunch of stiff necks and being   
forced to make polite conversation. Tom quickly darted his   
gaze away and continued to push his way out of the room.   
  
Finally he reached the big double doors that led out onto the   
patio and stumbled through them. Taking a few deep breaths of   
fresh air he noticed with dismay that there were nearly as many   
people out here as there were inside.   
  
"Tommy," a voice called and he looked over to see his oldest   
sister, Kathleen, pushing her way towards him. "Dad's really   
outdone himself this time," she said as she reached him and   
linked her arm through his. "This would have to be the   
biggest party he's ever held." They walked out into the   
gardens to get away from the crowd.  
  
"Yeah, well its not every day his one and only son graduates   
from Starfleet Academy," Tom said bitterly. "I don't even   
know half these people. And the other half, I barely do."  
  
Kathleen laughed lightly. "Trust Dad," she smiled. "He   
*would* turn your graduation into an opportunity to improve   
his public image."  
  
Tom stopped in mid-stride, frowning fiercely. "I've got a   
good mind to spend the rest of the night in my room."  
  
"Dad would probably send a security team up to drag you down.   
Grin and bear it, Tommy. Just like you have countless times   
before. Let Dad have his little moment in the spotlight."  
  
"This isn't what I wanted. I'm so sick of everything," Tom   
said angrily. "I didn't want a big fuss made over my   
graduation. Dad knew that. Gods, I wish he'd listen to me   
just for once in my life."  
  
Kathleen sighed tiredly. "I know, Tommy. But this means a   
lot to Dad remember. This time last year it looked like your   
career in Starfleet was over. If it wasn't for Admiral Brand   
talking you out of throwing it all in and repeating your   
final year instead, it would have been. Dad's dream would   
have been too."  
  
"Sometimes I wish I *had* quit."  
  
"You don't mean that."  
  
"Damn it, Kath, I'm going to be twenty-three years old in a   
couple of months and most of the time I don't feel like I've   
got a life at all. My whole life revolves around what Dad   
wants me to do."  
  
"I understand that, but just be patient. Soon you'll be on   
your own. Away from Dad's influence and constant   
interfering. You'll be on the Enterprise... Starfleet's most   
coveted vessel. And there's no way in hell Captain Picard   
will let Dad interfere. It's a dream come true for you."  
  
Tom shook his head. "Charlie would have been on the   
Enterprise now. We could have served together. I just   
wish... well, you know," he ended softly.   
  
Kathleen squeezed his arm as she nodded. "Tommy, the   
accident was more than a year ago. You have to stop with all   
the self recrimination."  
  
"Kath, I killed them. All of them," he said in anguish. "My   
three closest friends."  
  
Kathleen hugged him tightly. "It was an accident. You made   
a mistake. No one blames you."  
  
"I blame myself."  
  
"They wouldn't want this, Tommy. They'd want you to get on   
with your life."  
  
"I know," Tom said softly. "It's just so hard."  
  
"There you are," someone cried racing towards them. "Tommy,   
you'd better get back inside quick. Dad's about to send a   
search party out for you." It was Moira, their sister.   
"What's going on? Anything I should know about?"  
  
Kathleen shook her head. "Tommy just needed to get away from   
the crowd for a while."  
  
"Jeez, I don't blame you. You do realize don't you, that   
most of those people up there are complete strangers?"  
  
Tom sighed. "We noticed."  
  
"You know, if I wasn't such a loving, adoring sister, I could   
be just a tiny bit jealous right now, little brother," Moira   
teased. "Jeez, when Kath and I graduated uni Dad invited   
about ten people."  
  
"Hey, well, you're welcome to this mob," Tom answered   
quietly.   
  
"I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy," Moira laughed   
before hugging him as well. The truth was, she adored her   
younger brother. Both sisters did. He was special.   
Although both sisters wished their father paid them a little   
more attention than he did, neither of them wanted the kind   
of attention that he lavished on Tom. Any jealous tendencies   
had been wiped out years ago.  
  
"Come on, you two," Moira said standing up straight and   
linking her arm through Tom's. She gestured to Kathleen to do   
the same. "We Paris kids will march in there with our heads   
held high. Just as the Admiral drummed into us years ago.   
We'll get you through this, Tommy. That's what big sisters   
are for."  
  
Tom couldn't help but laugh as he marched back up to the   
house between them both. He'd be leaving in two weeks. He   
wouldn't miss much about his life at the moment, but he'd   
certainly miss them. And his mother, he thought as he saw   
her heading down towards them, a worried frown on her face.  
  
She smiled as she saw them approaching. It reminded her of   
when they were children and they used to march around the   
gardens. Only now Tom towered over his two older sisters.   
"I was just coming to see if everything was all right," she   
said as they stopped in front of her. "Your father wants you   
to meet someone, Tom."  
  
Tom sighed. "Let me guess. Another Admiral."  
  
"No. A Commander this time. She's really very nice.   
Kathryn Janeway. I'm sure you've heard your father speak of   
her."  
  
Tom grimaced. "His little protégé. The little science   
officer he's single-handedly turning into a Captain? Gods,   
haven't I been punished enough tonight?"  
  
"Tom, don't be so quick to judge. She's a lovely lady," his   
mother frowned.  
  
"Mom's right, Tommy. Kathryn's great," Moira enthused. "And   
you know I'm not one for all these Starfleet types."  
  
"High praise indeed," Tom said sarcastically.  
  
Kathleen gave a small laugh. "If you'd hung around the house   
a little more over the past few years you would have met her   
already. Just give her a chance."  
  
"Yeah... right," Tom scoffed, but refrained from saying   
anything else. He didn't want to upset his mother, but he   
really didn't feel like meeting this drab little - yes Sir,   
let me lick your boots clean, Sir - perfect Starfleet officer   
his father was always talking about. He'd managed to avoid   
meeting her up until now. He might have guessed that tonight   
would be the night.  
  
Sighing heavily he marched back into the crowd and decided   
to get it over with, but if his father thought that he was   
going to be all over this woman asking for help on how to be   
the perfect officer too, he had another think coming.   
  
******  
  
Kathryn Janeway watched the young man standing in front of   
her and decided she didn't like him. No, that wasn't strong   
enough. She detested him. Smart aleck, spoilt brat. She   
wanted to smack that insolent look right off his face.   
  
The way that he'd acknowledged her when his father had   
introduced them had been snide, and he continued to look at   
her as if she were saying or doing something amusing. The   
look in his eyes was mocking.  
  
That this was the son of her mentor, the Thomas that she had   
heard so much about, was a shock. He was rude and   
insufferable and totally without any redeeming qualities that   
she could see.  
  
"Yes," he was saying. "You wouldn't believe how much my   
father raves on about what a paragon of virtue you are.   
Ah... If we could all only be like you."  
  
"Thomas, I think you've said enough." Kathryn looked up into   
the Admiral's face at the quiet rebuke. His eyes glimmered   
dangerously, and he was turning a deep shade of red as he   
glared at his son.   
  
Tom barely glanced at him. "Have I embarrassed you,   
Commander? Please accept my apologies."  
  
Kathryn looked him up and down a small smile on her face.   
She was pleased to notice that Tom turned a little red. Two   
could play this game. "That's not necessary. I wasn't   
embarrassed. I'm pleased to know that young people can look   
up to me as an example. I'm sure if you try a little harder   
you too can be a... um... paragon of virtue."  
  
Tom turned redder and mock saluted her with his glass of   
champagne. "Ah... but would anybody really want to be?" he   
countered.  
  
"How very astute," Kathryn said in the most condescending   
tone she could, raising her glass also. "Admiral," she asked   
turning towards him. "How old did you say your young son   
was? Eighteen? Nineteen?" She watched Tom out of the corner   
of her eye stiffen.  
  
"Thomas is twenty-two, Kathryn. After all, he's just   
graduated from the academy." There was a definite twinkle in   
the Admiral's eye now.  
  
"Really? Twenty-two? I'm surprised. I thought he must have   
started at the academy early or something, but I forgot...   
you actually repeated your final year, didn't you?" She   
turned her icy stare back to Tom and saw the insolent,   
mocking look wiped away. Genuine pain flashed through his   
eyes and he turned a little pale.   
  
Kathryn wished the words back at once. When would she learn?   
She was always letting her temper get the better of her. She   
knew all about Tom's past, of course, and knew that he had   
had a difficult time coping after the accident near Caldik   
Prime. The past year at the academy couldn't have been easy   
either.   
  
The majority of the other cadets had given him a pretty rough   
time. Nobody trusted a pilot that could make a mistake and   
kill three people. Nobody wanted to be in the same squadron   
as him, and although she could understand the sentiment, it   
must have been hard for him. She opened her mouth to   
apologize, but Tom had already recovered his composure.  
  
"That's right," he nodded. "I chose not to graduate last   
year. I didn't feel I deserved to. I think I needed to be   
punished and this last year has certainly been that. I still   
think I was right." Kathryn was surprised at the sincerity   
in his voice. Gone was the smart aleck, insolent young man   
from before and in his place was someone Kathryn would have   
liked to know. "Excuse me," Tom said suddenly. "I see   
someone over there that I actually know and would actually   
like to speak to." And with that he walked off.  
  
Kathryn watched him go, speechless at his audacity. Did he   
speak to all senior officers in that way? After all, he was   
only an Ensign. Admiral's son or not. Her opinion of Tom   
Paris reverted back to her original thoughts. If she never   
had anything to do with him again it would be too soon.  
  
"I must apologize for that," the Admiral said, obviously   
embarrassed. "I don't know what got into him. He's not   
usually like that."  
  
'Yeah... right,' Kathryn thought to herself but she didn't   
say it. She felt sorry for the poor Admiral, having a son   
like that. The Admiral obviously worshipped the ground Tom   
walked on. He was always talking about him, boasting about   
his achievements, and since the accident, worrying about him.   
And Tom just as obviously didn't care. He obviously took it   
all for granted.   
  
She wondered how he'd go on the Enterprise. Captain Picard   
wouldn't put up with any nonsense, that's for sure. She   
wondered why Picard had especially requested him, as from   
what she could gather, nobody else had really wanted him.   
She knew that Tom had become one of the most safety conscious   
and careful pilots at the academy since Caldik Prime, but his   
past would always hold him back. Knowing that Tom was a   
gifted pilot, she was still a little surprised that Captain   
Picard was willing to take him on.   
  
She reassured the Admiral as best she could, trying not to   
let him know just how awful she thought Tom really was until   
Kathleen and Moira joined them.  
  
"Hi, Kathryn," they both said at the same time. Kathleen   
looked up at her father. She could tell by his face that   
something had happened.  
  
"Where's Tommy?" Moira asked.  
  
"He's gone off somewhere with his friends," her father   
answered shortly.  
  
"Is something wrong?" Kathleen asked.  
  
"I don't think Tom and I hit it off very well," Kathryn   
answered diplomatically.  
  
"Oh dear. I had a horrible feeling that he was going to give   
you a hard time. What happened?"  
  
Admiral Paris snorted. "Thomas was insubordinate."  
  
"Oh! Did you put him on report?" Moira asked crisply.  
  
The Admiral flushed angrily. "That's not funny, young lady.   
I've had enough from your brother tonight."  
  
"Well honestly, Dad, what did you expect? You know Tommy   
didn't want any fuss and you organized all this." Moira   
waved her arms around.  
  
"It was a surprise for him. He could have been a little   
grateful."  
  
Kathryn privately agreed. She was a little surprised at   
Moira. She'd been able to get to know both the Paris girls   
quite well over the past few years and thought they were both   
very polite and charming. She hadn't expected Moira to speak   
to her father like that. And in front of someone outside the   
family too.  
  
"Moira... please," Kathleen said quickly. "Kathryn doesn't   
need to hear our family squabbles."  
  
Moira turned to her and smiled. "I'm sorry. You must think   
I'm terribly rude."  
  
"She probably thinks it runs in the family," Admiral Paris   
said with a disapproving stare. "Please accept my apologies,   
Kathryn."  
  
"As I've already told you, there's nothing to apologize for,"   
Kathryn said with a smile. The Admiral couldn't be held   
responsible for his children... after all, they were adults   
now, she decided.   
  
Two more Admirals claimed Admiral Paris's attention just then   
and Kathryn found herself alone with the two Paris sisters.   
"I'm so sorry if Tommy was rude to you," Kathleen apologized.   
  
"Well, it was hardly your fault," Kathryn answered dryly. "I   
just hope he doesn't treat all senior officers he meets the   
way he treated me. His career won't last long if he does."  
  
"I'm afraid you've got the wrong idea about him," Kathleen   
went on to explain. "He's had a bad night. Please excuse   
him."  
  
"You don't have to explain," Kathryn said quickly. Tom Paris   
was obviously coddled by his sisters. Her opinion of him   
went down even further. She decided to change the subject.   
Tom had managed to avoid meeting her all these years, and   
since he was assigned to the Enterprise she really didn't   
believe that she would have to have anything to do with him   
from now either. Anyway, she certainly hoped so.  
  
******  
  
Captain Kathryn Janeway stood on the bridge of her new ship.   
The U.S.S. Voyager. NCC-74656. A new intrepid-class vessel,   
especially designed for its maneuverability and speed.   
Kathryn looked around proudly. It was a beautiful ship.   
Sleek and modern. This was only the second intrepid-class   
vessel ever built. And it was hers. If it wasn't for the   
fact that she was worried sick about her Vulcan chief of   
security, Tuvok, she would be completely happy.   
  
Tuvok was more than just her security officer. He was a   
trusted friend and he was missing. He'd been working   
undercover infiltrating the Maquis, a group of rebels   
fighting against the Federation-Cardassian treaty. He'd   
failed to report in when he was supposed to and word had come   
back from the Cardassians that a vessel, that from last   
reports Tuvok had been aboard, had disappeared in the   
Badlands.  
  
Traveling through the Badlands was extremely hazardous, but   
this new ship was especially designed for it. Kathryn itched   
to get under way. The sound of the turbolift doors opening   
behind her made her swivel around. Admiral Radissan stepped   
out and smiled at her in greeting.   
  
"Katie, I thought I might find you up here. Can't tear   
yourself away?"  
  
Kathryn smiled. "She's my baby."  
  
"Well, baby or not, you should be home relaxing and getting   
some sleep. You've got a big day tomorrow." Voyager was   
scheduled to leave first thing in the morning and head for   
Deep Space Nine.  
  
Kathryn sighed. "I know. I just wanted to make sure   
everything was ready. Last minute jitters, I suppose you   
could say."  
  
Admiral Radissan grinned at her. "Well, I have some   
marvelous news for you. I've just come from a meeting with   
Admiral Paris and we've come up with the perfect solution for   
your piloting problems."  
  
Voyager's chief helmsman had been called away suddenly.   
Lieutenant Parkin's Mother had been taken seriously ill and   
the Lieutenant had been given compassionate leave. Kathryn   
had requested an experienced pilot to take his place, as this   
mission would require better than average pilots.   
  
"Thank you, Admiral, but I've had more than one skilled pilot   
assigned now. Lieutenant Stadi will be taking over as chief   
helmsman. She's a Betazoid with a lot of experience. We   
should be fine."  
  
"But wouldn't you prefer to have the best?"  
  
"The best?"   
  
"That's right. One of the best pilots in Starfleet just so   
happens to be between postings at the moment. He's waiting   
for the new Enterprise E to be finished. It's still quite a   
few months down the track yet, so we thought he could come   
with you. It's just temporary, of course. Just for this   
mission, probably. I don't think Jean-Luc wants to part with   
him permanently."  
  
Kathryn felt a sick churning in her stomach. "That's really   
not necessary, Admiral."  
  
"Nonsense," Admiral Radissan chuckled. "It was Owen's idea,   
and a good one at that."  
  
"I assume we're talking about Tom Paris here?" Her voice was   
more than a little dry.  
  
Admiral Radissan frowned. "If you're worried about his past,   
don't be. He's proven himself again and again on the   
Enterprise. He never takes any chances with the safety of   
the crew. The accident was a foolish mistake that happened   
to a young man that had quite a lot of things to deal with at   
the time. We are more than confident that nothing like that   
would ever happen again."  
  
"Oh, I'm sure of that too," Kathryn quickly agreed. "That's   
not what I'm worried about. I just thought he would have   
been busy. I'm surprised that he isn't."  
  
"He's on leave at the moment. He hasn't had any for quite   
some time." The Admiral nodded enthusiastically. "Quite a   
stroke of luck actually. Apparently young Thomas was only   
saying the other day that he would love to have the chance to   
fly one of the new intrepid-class ships."  
  
"Well lucky him." Kathryn couldn't help the sarcasm.   
  
Admiral Radissan raised his eyebrows. "You're friends with   
the family aren't you, so you know Tom, don't you?"  
  
Kathryn shook her head. "I know the Admiral's wife and   
daughters, but I've only met Tom once. It must have been   
three years ago now, at least. Admiral, I'd really prefer   
not to have him here. I don't need him."  
  
"Lieutenant Paris is a fine officer. He'd be an asset to any   
crew. Maneuvering through the Badlands is going to take the   
best pilot you can get, and Tom's it."  
  
Kathryn shook her head, an obstinate frown on her face.   
"That wouldn't be fair to Lieutenant Stadi. She's really   
looking forward to this mission. And she's more than   
capable."  
  
The Admiral crossed his arms across his chest and regarded   
her steadily. "Kathryn," he said finally. "Lieutenant Stadi   
will be assigned as your chief helmsman when you return from   
this mission. I don't understand your attitude. It's almost   
as if you don't like Tom, but you said you'd only met him   
once."  
  
"Once was quite enough," Kathryn answered shortly.  
  
"I see. I gather he didn't make a favorable impression."  
  
Kathryn snorted. "He did not."  
  
Admiral Radissan frowned. "I have always found Tom to be   
very likeable. Very easy to get along with and Jean-Luc   
speaks very highly of him."  
  
"Perhaps he didn't think I was worthy of impressing at the   
time."  
  
The Admiral frowned again. "I'm not sure I understand what   
the problem is. So, you don't like him? Is it a rule that   
Captains must like all their crew? Are you worried that he   
won't follow orders? I can assure you that he will, and   
besides, since when have you had a problem getting anyone to   
toe-the-line? I won't force him onto you if you truly don't   
believe that you can work with him... after all it's your   
ship, but this mission is very important. You should have   
the best people you possibly can have working under you."  
  
Kathryn sighed. "You're right, of course. And I shouldn't   
let my personal feelings affect my judgment."   
  
The Admiral patted her arm. "That's the spirit. And quite   
frankly, I don't think you'll regret this decision. Tom is a   
very nice person. Just give him a chance. It can't be easy   
trying to make a mark for yourself when you have an Admiral   
as famous as Owen Paris for a father."  
  
"Perhaps," she allowed. "And after all it's only for a few   
weeks. Surely I can put up with him for that long."  
  
Admiral Radissan smiled. "Three weeks at the most, Kathryn.   
Three weeks at the most."  
  
******  
  
Tom threw himself on his bed and pounded the pillow in   
disgust. He couldn't believe it. He'd just set everything   
up to be temporarily assigned to the new shuttle testing   
facility in Sydney, Australia, and now *this* happens. His   
father had done it again. He pounded the pillow again and   
then picking it up, threw it with all his might against the   
door of his room.  
  
A soft thud followed. The noise was not very satisfying.   
Tom walked over and picked the pillow up, throwing it back   
on his bed. Rummaging around in the back of his wardrobe he   
found his bag and promptly started throwing his clothes into   
it, without a lot of thought about what they might look like   
when he pulled them back out again.  
  
Slamming the doors of his cupboard with unnecessary force, he   
scooped his padds and personal items from the top of his   
bedside cupboard and threw them in on top of everything.   
Gritting his teeth, he sank back down on the bed and wished   
for about the thousandth time that he hadn't come home to   
visit.   
  
He wouldn't have either if Commander Riker hadn't made it   
sound like an order. In the three years since he'd been   
assigned to the Enterprise D, he had only come home once   
before. That visit had been a disaster also. His father had   
immediately started what could only be called an   
interrogation and when Tom had sarcastically remarked that he   
didn't realize he was at the Spanish inquisition, things had   
deteriorated quickly.  
  
He'd spent the rest of his visit flitting between his   
sister's houses and only visited his mother when he was sure   
his father wasn't home. The hurt she'd tried to hide still   
pierced his heart more than two years later. That was why,   
this time, he had been determined to make it up to her.   
  
He had withstood his father's endless questions and comments   
about everything he had done and should have done   
differently, and his endless criticism about the Enterprise   
and its crew. His father was obviously not one of Captain   
Picard's fans. He had quietly disagreed with his father over   
practically everything he said, but had managed to keep his   
temper at all times. His mother's obvious pleasure had made   
it all worthwhile.  
  
And then he'd come home this evening practically bursting   
with the news that Will Riker had just given him, to be told   
he was being temporarily assigned to Voyager. Under Captain   
Kathryn Janeway... no less, and he had to report first thing   
in the morning.  
  
"But, Dad, I can't go to Voyager. Commander Riker's set up   
an interview for me with the shuttle testing center in   
Sydney, tomorrow," he'd argued.  
  
Admiral Paris had sniffed disdainfully. "A test pilot,   
Thomas? I think not. I thought you'd outgrown all that   
nonsense years ago."  
  
Tom had flushed angrily. "No, Dad, I just put it on hold for   
a while. It's something I've always wanted to do. Now's my   
chance. Just until the Enterprise E is ready."  
  
"You have more important things to do. Now it's all been   
arranged, so there's not much sense arguing. You have orders   
to follow."  
  
"Naturally," Tom had replied bitterly.  
  
"Thomas, I don't think you realize what an important   
assignment this is. It will help your career. And you'll   
get to test out the new intrepid class vessel. What more   
could you want?"  
  
"I want to do what *I* planned," Tom had answered quietly.   
"The Commander went to a lot of trouble setting up this   
interview for me and I can't just not turn up. That wouldn't   
be very good for my career now either, would it?" he'd ended   
sarcastically.  
  
"Don't worry about that. I'll explain to them," his father   
had said dismissively. "Perhaps Commander Riker could take   
your place instead. That's probably what he should be doing   
anyway."  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Tom had asked, his voice   
rising a little. His father had made quite a few cutting   
remarks about all of his shipmates over the past few weeks,   
but he had managed to ignore him up until then. But at that   
moment... well he was spoiling for a fight.   
  
"Will Riker has had the opportunity to captain his own ship   
on numerous occasions and each time he's turned it down. The   
man has no ambition. He should probably take himself right   
out of the running."  
  
Tom, whom respected and admired Will Riker, answered   
furiously. "How dare you say that? The Borg would have   
assimilated us all if it wasn't for him outsmarting them and   
getting Captain Picard back. It was one of the first things   
I was told about when I joined the crew. Everyone on that   
ship thinks the world of the Commander. He made a decision   
to stay aboard the Enterprise because he's happy and content   
there. Quite frankly, I envy him."  
  
"That's what worries me. Will Riker was one of the most   
ambitious cadets we'd ever had at the academy. Gods! He   
was a Commander by the age of thirty, and now look at him.   
All of his aspirations gone. I won't allow you to do that."  
  
"What are you saying? Are you crazy?" Tom had shouted,   
bringing his mother hurrying into the room.  
  
"I'm saying that this Voyager mission could be the turning   
point in your career. The Maquis have to be stopped and if   
you can be one of the key people instrumental in doing that   
you could be a Lieutenant Commander by the end of the year.   
Just think of that, Tom."  
  
"I am," Tom had yelled. "It makes me want to puke."  
  
"Thomas!" his father had roared while his mother had stepped   
between them.  
  
"I'm not sure what's happening here, but I won't have you   
yelling at one another," she'd said firmly, the distress   
obvious in her bright blue eyes. "Now, both of you calm down   
and tell me what's going on."  
  
When Tom had finished explaining, she had turned to her   
husband. "I know why you did this, Owen, but you have to   
stop it. Tom is a grown man. Let him lead his own life.   
You have to stop interfering. You have to leave him alone."  
  
"Fine." Owen Paris had turned away abruptly. "This is the   
last time I'll try to help you, Thomas. You're on your own."  
  
"Good," he'd said gruffly, not believing his father for a   
moment, and then turning on his heel had marched from the   
room.  
  
Tom laid down on the bed and closed his eyes. He needed to   
get some sleep. Tomorrow would be one hell of a day.  
  
  
End Part One 


	2. Chapter Two

Comparisons - Part Two  
By T'Pam  
  
  
For disclaimer, codes and rating, please see part 1.  
  
  
~^~  
  
Kathryn opened the front door of her house and cautiously   
stepped inside, only to be practically bowled over by an   
enthusiastic red setter. "Hello, baby," she said softly   
kneeling down and patting the dog's head. Placing her cheek   
against the dog's soft hair she asked. "How's my girl?"  
  
"Your girl's fine," a voice called from the kitchen. "I'm not   
sure about these potatoes though."  
  
Kathryn stood up and hurried over to the doorway. "Mark,"   
she smiled. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"I thought I'd cook us some dinner, or should I make that   
supper?"  
  
"Whatever you want to call it is fine by me. I'm starving.   
You should have called me. I would have come home earlier."  
  
"No, you had things to do. I didn't want to disturb you.   
And don't worry, everything's taken care of here. I'll keep   
an eye on the house and the dog while you're gone."  
  
"Thanks, honey. I don't know what I'd do without you." A   
wet nose nudged her hand and she knelt back down on the floor   
again. "Oh, sweetie," she said patting the dog gently. "You   
really haven't been yourself lately, have you?" She looked   
up at Mark. "Actually, I'm a little worried about her. I   
was thinking about taking her to the clinic."  
  
Mark knelt down on the floor as well and studied the dog   
closely. "What do you think's wrong?"  
  
"I'm not sure, but I hope she's going to have some puppies."  
  
"Hey, that would be great," Mark said with a smile.  
  
Kathryn nodded. "I can't wait."  
  
"I'll take her to the clinic for you, if she doesn't pick   
up."  
  
Kathryn hugged him tightly. "I'm going to miss you," she   
said softly.  
  
"Me, too," he answered before standing up and going back into   
the kitchen. "Now sit down and I'll serve up."  
  
Despite claiming she was starving, Kathryn toyed with the   
food in front of her.  
  
"You're worried about Tuvok, aren't you?" Mark finally said.  
  
Kathryn looked up with a start. "Yes, I am."  
  
"Try not to worry. I'm sure he's fine. Vulcans are terribly   
resilient you know."  
  
Kathryn nodded. "It's not just that. I just found out   
tonight that I've got a new chief helmsman. It's only   
temporary - thank God - just this mission, but it rather   
unsettled me."  
  
"Oh?" Mark waited for her to continue.   
  
"It's Owen's son... Tom," she finally said.  
  
"The brat packer?" Kathryn smiled and nodded. "I see. How   
did that happen?" He could still remember how angry and   
disappointed she had been after finally meeting her mentor's   
son.  
  
Kathryn sighed. "It seems he's not doing anything at the   
moment and wanted to fly the new intrepid class ship. Owen   
set it up for him. Admiral Radissan said it was my call,   
whether he came along or not, but how could I say no? He's   
one of the best pilots in Starfleet and the badlands are   
going to be tricky."  
  
"Well, it might be a good thing he'll be on board then."  
  
"I intend to make it quite clear to him right from the start   
that it's no joyride. He's going to regret very quickly   
pulling all the strings he must have pulled."  
  
Mark laughed at her fierce expression. "I think I feel sorry   
for him."  
  
"Save your pity for someone that deserves it."  
  
"Is he really that bad? After all, you only met him once,   
and Kathleen Paris did say that he wasn't normally so rude.   
He'd had a bad night. You told me that yourself."  
  
"Admiral Radissan seems to think that he's a fine young man."  
  
"Well there you go then. He's a pretty good judge of   
character."  
  
"Yes, well so am I."  
  
Mark snorted and shook his head. "What about poor Tuvok?   
You detested him when you first met him."  
  
Kathryn had the grace to blush. "What I thought about him   
was all true. It's just that I've learned to appreciate it.   
I look at him in a different context now."  
  
"Well, then what about me. You never liked *me* much when we   
were kids."  
  
Kathryn opened her mouth to deny the accusation, but then   
closed it again. "That's different. You've changed."  
  
"Maybe Tom Paris has too. After all, he's been on the   
Enterprise for the past few years. Anything's possible." He   
sighed as she frowned. "All I'm saying is, give him a   
chance, Kat. You just never know."  
  
******  
  
"Welcome aboard, Lieutenant Paris." Kathryn inwardly winced.   
Her voice sounded cold and flat, even to her own ears. Tom's   
smile seemed to freeze as he regarded her.  
  
"Thank you, Captain," he finally answered. An awkward   
silence followed.  
  
Kathryn cleared her throat. "Well, have you had your tour of   
the ship?" She tried to put a little more warmth in her   
voice.  
  
"Yes, Captain. It's very... um... nice."  
  
Nice? It was a beautiful ship. You'd think he could be a   
little more enthusiastic than that! "I'm sure it's not on   
the same grand scale as the new Enterprise E will be, but   
she'll do me," she bit out crisply.  
  
"I'm sure she will, Captain."  
  
Kathryn looked at him sharply. There had been no inflection   
in his voice whatsoever, but it still sounded like an insult.   
"Let's get something straight, right from the start, shall   
we, Lieutenant? This is *my* ship. And as long as you are   
aboard it, you are *my* crewman. Your father has no   
jurisdiction here at all. Is that understood?"  
  
Tom turned bright red, whether it was with anger or   
embarrassment, she wasn't sure. "Yes, Captain," was all he   
said however.  
  
"The attitude stays off this ship," she continued. "Is that   
also understood?"  
  
Tom's face showed his confusion. He truly looked like he   
didn't know what she was talking about. "Understood," he   
answered mechanically.   
  
"Good. Now since you wanted to fly this ship so badly you'd   
better get out there and do it. We'll be leaving shortly.'  
  
She walked around her desk and headed for the doors leading   
onto the bridge. She turned around when she realized that   
Tom was not following her. He was still standing in the   
middle of the room. "Lieutenant?"  
  
Tom turned around to face her. "Permission to speak freely,   
Captain?"  
  
Kathryn steeled herself. "Go ahead."  
  
"I get the impression you're not too happy to have me here.   
Well, I can assure you the feeling's mutual."  
  
"Really? Perhaps you should have thought about that before   
going to so much trouble. After all, you must have known   
you'd have me as your Captain."  
  
Tom looked at her in astonishment. "You think I got my Dad   
to pull a few strings so that I could go on some sort of   
joyride in a new ship,' he guessed.  
  
Kathryn nodded. "Your skills will certainly come in   
handy..."  
  
"You're wrong," Tom interrupted. "My father decided that   
this was a good career move for me. I knew nothing about it   
until I got home last night."  
  
"I see," Kathryn said slowly. She regarded him steadily for   
a few moments, wondering if he was telling the truth. He   
might have decided that he didn't want this assignment after   
all, now that he realized she wouldn't put up with any   
nonsense. "So now what? You want me to release you from the   
assignment?"  
  
Tom looked shocked at the suggestion. "No, Captain. Of   
course not. Unless, of course, you don't think you can work   
with me. I'm sorry that you seem to dislike me so much."  
  
Kathryn shook her head. "I'm professional enough to put   
personal feelings aside, Lieutenant. Well, I suppose we're   
stuck with each other for the next few weeks. As long as you   
follow my orders we shouldn't have a problem." She turned   
around once more to make her way to the bridge.  
  
"Yes, Ma'am," Tom answered following her. The tone was the   
same as he'd used before. And once again Kathryn felt he'd   
just insulted her. She felt herself bristling as she led him   
onto the bridge. She tried to analyze just what it was about   
his tone of voice that upset her so much and then it hit her.   
There was no respect or admiration in the tone. She was used   
to her crew speaking to her with both.   
  
She introduced him to her first officer Lieutenant Commander   
Cavit and let him take over. As she sat in her chair and   
watched Cavit practically fawn all over Tom she had to grit   
her teeth. She didn't give a fig whether Lieutenant Thomas   
Eugene Paris liked her or not, but the disrespect *did* bother   
her, especially since she had done nothing to deserve it.  
  
******  
  
Tom poked his head around the infirmary door as a pretty   
Bajoran nurse looked up and smiled. "Yes, Lieutenant? Can I   
help you?"  
  
Tom flashed her his most charming smile. "Actually, I'm   
looking for Dr. Bashir. Is he around anywhere?"  
  
"He's just seeing a patient. If you'd like to wait, he   
shouldn't be too long."  
  
Tom sat on the chair she indicated and preceded to flirt with   
the nurse while he waited. By the time Julian had come out   
of the small examining room and entered the main room, she   
was giggling like a schoolgirl. He frowned at her before   
looking over at his next patient.   
  
A huge smile lit his face. "Tom! What are you doing here?"   
He raced over and engulfed him in a brotherly hug. "Don't   
tell me you've been assigned here?"  
  
Tom shook his head. "I wish. I just thought that while I'm   
here I'd look you up. Long time - no see, and all that."   
  
"It has been a while, hasn't it?" Julian said with a smile.   
"Over three years?"  
  
Tom nodded. "My graduation party to be exact." The two had   
met eight years before while still at the academy. Even   
though Julian had been a senior at the time and on his way to   
medical school and Tom had been a first year freshman they'd   
hit it off immediately. They'd remained firm friends and   
kept in touch ever since.  
  
"So what are you doing here? The last I heard from you, I   
thought you were twiddling your thumbs waiting for the   
Enterprise E to be built. Why didn't you tell me you were   
coming? I'd have baked a cake or something."  
  
Tom laughed. "Actually I didn't know I *was* coming. I'm on   
a temporary assignment." He moved Julian over towards the   
examining room, out of earshot of the nurse. "We're going to   
the badlands to round up some Maquis."  
  
Julian whistled. "Always gotta get in on the action, don't   
you, Tommy?"  
  
"Hey, this wasn't my idea. Dear old Dad volunteered me."   
His voice rose a little in his indignation. "Will Riker had   
it all lined up for me to go to Australia to test the new   
shuttle craft. Instead I'm stuck on this stupid assignment;   
doing something I don't even think we should be doing, to in   
Dad's words 'help my career'. What a load of garbage."  
  
"I'm sorry, Tom. Did you tell your father how much the   
Australia thing meant to you?"  
  
"Since when does he ever listen to me anyway? And that's not   
even the worst of it. My new Captain hates my guts. Not   
that that really bothers me, considering who it is. One of   
Dad's little protégés, crawling along behind him, molded in   
his image. But it will make the next few weeks kind of   
difficult."  
  
"Surely not. No one could hate you once they get to know   
you, that is when you're not whining and complaining."  
  
Tom laughed good-naturedly at the dig, and punched Julian   
lightly on the arm. "Okay, I get the message. No more   
complaints from me. I've got three hours before I have to   
report back to the iron maiden's torture chamber. Let's make   
the most of it."  
  
Julian laughed. "That sounds like a good idea. Iron maiden's   
torture chamber? This new ship sounds like a lot of fun."  
  
"Actually, the ships beautiful. You should see it. New   
intrepid-class. Sleek, classic lines. Even the name's   
exciting. Voyager. Pity about the Captain. She spoils the   
whole image."  
  
"Voyager?" Julian paled a little and suddenly looked back at   
the examination room.  
  
"Yeah. You heard of it?"  
  
"I think so." Julian suddenly grabbed Tom's arm. "Let's go.   
There's this really great bar on the promenade I want to show   
you. It's called Quarks." He was practically dragging Tom   
from the infirmary. "You'll love it."  
  
Tom pulled his arm free laughing. "Since when have I ever   
needed to be dragged into a bar? Dragged out maybe."  
  
"I trust you'll ensure you're not inebriated when you report   
back for duty, Lieutenant."   
  
Tom's stomach lurched at the familiar voice. "C-C-Captain,"   
he stuttered turning around. Captain Janeway stood in the   
examining room's doorway. He swallowed at the look on her   
face.  
  
"I assume I can now leave, Doctor?" she asked Julian icily.   
  
"O-Of course," Julian stuttered as well. "M-My nurse will   
contact you if there are any problems."  
  
"Thank you," she said frostily. She then turned to Tom.   
"I'll see *you* back on the torture chamber." It sounded   
like a threat. With that she marched off and Tom sank into   
one of the chairs.  
  
"Phew!!!!" Julian gasped, leaning against the doorway for   
support. "I don't envy you, Tommy. I don't envy you at   
all."  
  
"Why didn't you warn me?" Tom moaned. "Why didn't you stop   
me?"  
  
"I forgot she was in there. Besides, I didn't know it was   
her you were talking about until you mentioned Voyager. By   
then it was too late."  
  
Tom moaned again. "Julian, do me a favor. Cut my tongue out   
now. That way I can give it to her when I return to the   
ship."  
  
Julian shook his head and started to laugh. Soon he was   
holding his sides. "I'm sorry, Tom," he managed to gasp out   
as Tom scowled darkly at him. "But the look of horror on   
your face. It was priceless." As soon as he had himself   
under control he reached out and pulled Tom to his feet.   
"Come on. We really do need to go to Quarks now. You need a   
drink."  
  
Tom snorted. "I need more than one."  
  
******  
  
Kathryn marched around her ready room, too angry to   
concentrate. She was still as angry as she had been two   
hours ago. Picking up a data padd from her desk, she scanned   
it quickly. There was so much to do before they set off, and   
she felt that everything was in chaos. Her terminal beeped   
at that moment. Incoming communication from Earth, she was   
told.  
  
Soon, Mark's smiling face was beaming at her. "I won't hold   
you up. I know you're busy. I just wanted to wish you luck."  
  
"Oh, Mark! Am I glad to see you," she said enthusiastically.  
  
"You sound a little upset. How's everything going?"  
  
"We've picked up the rest of the crew and they seem to be   
settling in. We'll be leaving in a couple of hours."  
  
"So, what's wrong?"  
  
Kathryn sighed. "It's Tom Paris. He's insufferable. I   
don't think I'll be able to work with him after all."  
  
"Oh? What's happened?"  
  
"I overheard a rather awful conversation while I was in the   
Deep Space Nine infirmary. I'd just had my yearly checkup   
and was getting dressed in the examining room, and he was   
standing right outside it talking to the Doctor. Apparently   
they're old friends."  
  
"Why did you go to the infirmary on Deep Space Nine? You've   
got a brand new, state-of-the-art, sickbay on the ship."  
  
"I know. I'd just rather use it only when I have to. I   
don't feel comfortable with the Doctor. It's hard to   
explain. Only now, I wish I had."  
  
"You'd better tell me what he said."  
  
******  
  
Tom watched out of the corner of his eye as the Ferengi   
barkeeper made short work of the naive young Ensign sitting   
at the bar. He had enough troubles of his own at the moment.   
He wasn't going to involve himself in some one else's.  
  
"Maybe we better rescue him," Julian said suddenly. "Quark   
will take him for everything he's got otherwise."  
  
Tom sighed. "I suppose so."  
  
"They're not for sale," the Ferengi shouted jerking the tray   
of supposed 'Lobi crystals' from the young man's hands.   
"Now," he sniffed. "Inform your commanding officer that the   
Federation Council can expect an official query from..."  
  
"Quark!" Julian said quickly heading over.  
  
"Keep out of this, Doctor," the barkeeper hissed, giving him   
a belligerent stare.  
  
The young Ensign was desperate. "How much for the entire   
tray?"  
  
"Cash or credit?"  
  
This was too much for Tom who strolled casually over to   
comment in a loud voice, "Dazzling, aren't they? As bright   
as Koladan diamonds."  
  
Quark gave him a dirty look.  
  
******  
  
Kathryn kissed her fingers and then touched the screen in   
front of her, smiling in a goodbye gesture to Mark. As soon   
as the connection was broken she picked up another padd to   
read. She felt much better now.  
  
Mark had made her see the funny side of the situation. The   
look of absolute terror on Tom's face had been a sight. She   
was sure she could use that to her advantage. She doubted he   
would step out of line again. He'd probably be on his best   
behavior from now on.   
  
The chime to her outside door sounded. "Come in," she   
called.  
  
She recognized the young man when he entered from the crew   
manifest she'd gone over earlier. Ensign Harry Kim. Her   
new Operations officer. "Welcome aboard Voyager, Mr. Kim,"   
she said with a smile.  
  
"Thank you, Sir," he said breathlessly, standing stiffly at   
attention.  
  
"Mr. Kim," she said with a twinkle in her eye. The poor kid   
looked terrified. "At ease before you sprain something.'  
  
He attempted to relax a little, but he didn't really look   
much different. "Mr. Kim," she continued. "Despite   
Starfleet protocol, I don't like being addressed as 'Sir'."  
  
Harry flushed with embarrassment. "I'm sorry... Ma'am?"  
  
"Ma'am is acceptable in a crunch, but I prefer, 'Captain'."   
  
He nodded his head and she gestured to the door on the other   
side of the ready room. "We're getting ready to leave. I'll   
show you to the bridge."  
  
As they entered, she noticed her first officer standing down   
by Tom at the helm. They looked up at their entrance. She   
noticed Tom was grinning at the Ensign standing beside her.   
She frowned a little. 'Don't tell me they know each other as   
well.' Introducing Harry to Lieutenant Commander Cavit, she   
then directed him to the operations console.  
  
"This is your station. Would you like to take over?"  
  
"Yes, Ma'am," he answered eagerly, a huge smile on his face.  
  
"It's not crunch time yet, Mr. Kim," she said waving him into   
his seat. "I'll let you know when."  
  
******  
  
Kathryn watched sourly as one after another of the crew   
gravitated toward the table where Tom Paris and Harry Kim were   
eating their lunch. She had her own private dining room, of   
course, but liked to eat in the mess hall to get to know the   
crew better.  
  
Everybody seemed to want to ask Tom about the Enterprise.   
She turned away with disgust as whatever story Tom was   
regaling caused everyone to erupt into loud laughter. Cavit,   
who was sitting with her, turned around at the noise.   
"Lieutenant Paris certainly seems popular," he remarked.  
  
"I think that has more to do with where he last served than   
anything to do with his personality."  
  
"Yes, that's probably true," Cavit answered quickly. "That's   
very astute of you, Captain."  
  
"Oh? I thought you liked him, Commander?"  
  
"Well, I suppose so. He seems agreeable enough."  
  
"Not to me he isn't."  
  
"Well, no, I can see why you'd have problems with him.   
There's something not quite right there. I've noticed it   
myself."  
  
"Have you," Janeway said flatly. She found it difficult to   
keep the dislike from her features. Her first officer was a   
crawler. A yes man. He would agree with whatever she said,   
and it became more than a little irritating after a while.  
  
She had already seen him with Tom on several occasions, and it   
was obvious to her that he was trying to get Tom to put in a   
good word for him with Owen. If only he knew. From the   
little bit she'd gathered over the past few days, Tom had no   
influence whatsoever with his father.   
  
She snorted. Let the little worm make a fool of himself.   
Cavit's eyebrows rose. "Is something wrong, Captain?"  
  
"No. I was just thinking about something," she answered.   
She stood up quickly. "I've still got some reports to read   
before we reach the badlands. I'll be in my ready room."  
  
Cavit stood up as well. "Of course, Captain."  
  
As Kathryn left the mess hall she turned around to see the   
first officer already making his way over to the group around   
Paris and Kim. She snorted again.  
  
******  
  
"Brace for impact!" Janeway ordered, as the ship was picked   
up and hurled away.  
  
Tom fought for control, knowing it was useless, but trying   
anyway. He was surrounded in darkness and then all of a   
sudden the ship seemed to burst into light. A light so   
bright that he could feel it burning into his chest and face.   
Putting up his hands for protection, he saw a flash of red at   
his side and felt something covering him.   
  
The momentum sent him hurtling from his seat and onto the   
floor; whatever it was still covering him. It felt heavy and   
Tom found it hard to breathe. His chest and face still   
burned, the pain becoming agonizing. He would have screamed   
if he'd had the breath to do it.  
  
The noise of tearing metal surrounded him and it flashed   
through his mind that the ship was being torn apart. The   
weight covering him was so heavy, he couldn't make a sound.   
A horrible stench filled his nostrils and he realized it was   
the smell of burning flesh. As the darkness came up to greet   
him, he sank into it gratefully.  
  
******  
  
"Report!"   
  
"Hull breach, Deck Fourteen." Harry Kim checked his console   
as quickly as he could. He still felt a little woozy. He   
must have hit his head on something. "Comm lines to   
engineering are down. Trying to reestablish." He hoped he   
sounded calm and businesslike.  
  
"Repair crews, seal off hull breach on deck fourteen,"   
Janeway rapped out before kneeling beside the two bodies   
lying next to the burnt out helm console. Gently rolling   
Cavit away from Tom, she checked him for a pulse.  
  
Harry could see that the man was dead, from where he stood.   
One whole side of Cavit's face was scorched, and his eyes were   
dull and lifeless. Harry's heart thudded in his chest as the   
Captain bent over Tom. He couldn't see how bad his new   
friend was. Her body blocked his view.  
  
"Casualty reports coming in," a voice called from somewhere.   
"Sickbay is not responding."  
  
Janeway looked up. "There's a faint pulse," she said to no   
one in particular. "Bridge to sickbay," she called out.   
"Doctor, can you hear me?" She gestured to two crewmen.   
"Take him down to sickbay. See what's going on."  
  
As the two men carried Tom away, Harry ventured to ask.   
"Captain? How bad is he?"  
  
"Bad," she answered crisply.  
  
Harry busied himself at his console once again. "Captain?"   
he called out suddenly. "Something's out there."  
  
"I need a better description than that, Mr. Kim."   
  
"I don't know," Harry blurted out, embarrassed to be unable   
to tell her. "I'm reading... I'm not sure *what* I'm   
reading."  
  
"Can you get the viewscreen operational?"  
  
"I'm trying."  
  
Finally managing to clear up the static, the structure that   
his sensors had picked up came into view. He gazed in   
wonder, still not sure what it was he was looking at. The   
giant array on the viewscreen looked menacing. Seeming as if   
it was tethered to one of the pylons of the array was the   
Maquis ship that they'd set out to find.  
  
Harry concentrated on his readouts once again and what he   
read made his stomach lurch and drop to his toes.   
  
He shook his head in wonder. "Captain, if these sensors are   
working, we're over seventy thousand light-years from where   
we were." He looked at her numbly. "We're on the other side   
of the galaxy!"  
  
******  
  
Kathryn sighed with relief as she realized that the very real   
possibility of a warp core breach had been averted. She   
looked around engineering dejectedly. The chief engineer was   
dead, along with six other crewmembers from engineering. Her   
first officer and transporter chief were also dead, along   
with many other crewmembers from all over the ship.  
  
She rubbed her hands over her face and sighed in frustration.   
Ensign Michaels, whom she'd sent to sickbay, had reported   
that both the doctor and nurse were dead as well.   
  
Straightening her shoulders, she contacted sickbay. "Janeway   
to sickbay. Please report."  
  
"Ensign Michaels here, Captain. Most of the crew has now   
been treated. There are only a few minor injuries left. The   
Emergency Medical Hologram has handled everything."  
  
"Well that's good news." She steeled herself to ask the next   
question. She didn't know how she'd explain to Owen, his   
son's death. The thought that they may not be able to return   
to explain anything to anyone never crossed her mind. "How's   
Lieutenant Paris?"  
  
Ensign Michaels hesitated. "I'm not sure, Captain. The   
hologram put him in a stasis chamber. He doesn't look good."  
  
"I see," Kathryn answered, her heart sinking. "Thank you.   
I'll be down there in a minute."  
  
Lieutenant Carey seemed to have everything under control in   
engineering now, so she decided to go down and see if she   
could find out a little more about Tom.  
  
Her commbadge beeped before she could make it out the door.   
"Bridge to Janeway." It was Rollins and his voice sounded   
panicked. "We're being scanned by the array, Captain. It's   
penetrated our shields."  
  
"What kind of scan?" she asked as a strange noise came from   
her commbadge. "Bridge? Janeway to bridge. Respond!"  
  
All around her people started disappearing as they were   
caught in some sort of transporter beam. "Initiate emergency   
lock off," she started to order, just as the transporter beam   
engulfed her as well.  
  
******  
  
Sickbay was a hive of activity as the EMH program diagnosed,   
treated and quickly dispersed the incoming patients. "You're   
not seriously hurt," he said to the ensign lying on the   
biobed. "You can return to your station."  
  
The young woman nodded and attempted to sit up. Suddenly a   
transporter beam surrounded her and she was beamed out of   
sickbay. All around the EMH the sound of the transporter   
could be heard. He looked around in surprise.   
  
"This is the emergency holographic doctor speaking. I gave   
no permission for anyone to be transported out of sickbay."   
He waited expectantly. "Hello? Sickbay to bridge." When   
there was still no answer he sighed in frustration. "I   
believe someone has failed to terminate my program. Please   
respond." He sighed once more.  
  
Sudden concern had him hurrying over to the stasis chamber.   
It, too, was empty. "Well, really!" he spluttered. "This   
patient was in no condition to be moved. This is most   
inconsiderate. I would like to make an official notation   
that this course of action is against my express   
recommendations."   
  
The EMH slowly paced up and down the sickbay. "Please   
respond! Somebody! Anybody!" Silence followed. "Computer,   
are there any life signs aboard this vessel?"  
  
'Negative.'  
  
"I see." Irritation flashed across his face. "Couldn't   
somebody have shut off my program before they left?"  
  
'Unable to respond. Please restate the query.'  
  
"Unable to comply," the EMH returned sharply. Looking   
around, he sighed once more. Not knowing how long it would   
be until some one *did* come along to turn him off, he   
decided to clean up.  
  
******  
  
Kathryn moaned as she rolled over. Standing up slowly she   
looked around. She was in engineering again. Everyone   
seemed to be lying around in roughly the same places they   
were before they were snatched away. Within a few moments   
they were all getting to their feet.  
  
Slapping at her commbadge she tried to smile reassuringly at   
everyone. "Janeway to bridge. Anybody there?"  
  
"Yes, Captain," Rollins answered.   
  
"How long were we over there?"  
  
"Three days," came the reply.  
  
"Three days?" she repeated.  
  
"Captain, the Maquis ship is powering up its engines,"  
Rollins reported.  
  
'Tractor them," she ordered as she headed for the turbolift.   
"All senior officers report to the bridge immediately."  
  
Kathryn was halfway to the bridge when Rollins voice came   
through her commbadge once again. "Captain, we have a   
problem. Ensign Kim is missing."  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"Yes, Captain. Every one else on the bridge was returned to   
their station except Mr. Kim. The computer says he's not on   
board."  
  
Damn it!!! "Acknowledged." She sighed deeply. "Computer,   
how many crewmen are unaccounted for?"  
  
'Two. Lieutenant Thomas Paris and Ensign Harry Kim.'  
  
  
End Part Two 


	3. Chapter Three

Comparisons - Part Three  
By T'Pam   
  
  
For disclaimer, codes and rating, please see part 1.  
  
  
~^~  
  
Harry Kim slowly became aware of voices around him. #He's   
regaining consciousness.# The voice seemed to be inside of   
him. He quickly opened his eyes only to moan and shut them   
again. It was too bright. It hurt. He opened his eyes a   
little slower this time and a face came into focus bending   
over him. It was a man smiling gently down at him. #How do   
you feel?#  
  
Harry started. The man hadn't opened his mouth. "What am I   
doing here? Where am I?" he panicked.  
  
"Please, don't try to move yet," a pleasant faced woman told   
him. "You are very ill."  
  
"Ill?" Harry said confused. He tried to sit up. "There's   
some mistake. I'm not..." and then he saw them. Big knotty   
masses of flesh on the back of his hand and arm. Oh God!!   
Oh God!! What was wrong with him? His neck felt strange   
too. Pulling open his gown he found another one. He blinked   
and gasped in shock.  
  
"No!" The voice filled the room. Looking across, Harry   
could see a woman, dressed in the same white gown as he was,   
jumping from her bed and pushing the attendant away. Their   
eyes met and locked, before she forced her way to the door.  
  
She put up a good fight before they managed to sedate her and   
carry her back to her bed. Harry watched quietly, trying to   
work out what was going on. He recognized the woman as one   
of the Maquis he'd seen hanging so weirdly in the back of the   
holographic barn.  
  
Gazing around the room he noticed a figure swathed in   
bandages on the other side of the room. Golden hair   
protruded from the mass of bandages covering the person's   
face. Could it be?   
  
"Tom," he called out hesitantly. The more he looked the more   
sure he was. He swung his legs to the side of the bed and   
attempted to stand.  
  
The attendant was at his side in a moment. "Please, don't   
try to stand. You're too weak."  
  
"That's my friend over there. Is he all right?"  
  
The man came up to stand in front of him. "He arrived here   
some time before you. We've done all we can. He was badly   
hurt."  
  
"Does he have these *things*" Harry gestured to his neck,   
"growing on him too?" He'd noticed that the woman seemed to   
have even more of the hideous growths than he had.  
  
The alien shook his head. "No. His injuries were caused   
from some sort of explosion. We have him in a healing   
trance. I am hopeful that he will recover."  
  
Harry nodded. Indicating his hand he asked, "What *are*   
these things?"  
  
A sad expression crossed the man's face. "I'm sorry. We   
really don't know." At Harry's horrified look, he continued.   
"You need to get some rest. We will answer all your   
questions later." They quickly left the room and Harry,   
feeling sick to his stomach, laid back down.   
  
These things growing on him were terrifying. Tears slowly   
slid down his cheeks as he wondered where Voyager was. Were   
the rest of the crew here somewhere as well? Were they even   
still alive? Curling up into a little ball he wiped the   
tears away with his sleeve and longed for home. He'd never   
felt so miserable in all his life.  
  
******  
  
Kathryn stood looking out at the stars from her ready room   
viewport. Soon they would be in orbit of the fifth planet   
and they could start the search for Paris and Kim. And the   
missing Maquis woman, B'Elanna Torres, she reminded herself.   
The strange little alien they had brought on board, called   
Neelix, was quite confident that the missing crewmembers   
would be with the Ocampa peoples. She hoped he was right.  
  
Working with the Maquis seemed a little strange, but she was   
sure she could trust their Captain, Chakotay. He was a man   
of honor, and until they rescued Paris and the others she was   
confident that he would help them. After that was anybody's   
guess, of course, as she didn't think he'd let them all be   
taken prisoner and carted back to the Alpha Quadrant.   
  
That brought up another problem. How were they to get back?   
The being that had brought them here, the Ocampa Caretaker,   
didn't seem very helpful. As soon as they got the others   
back she was going to investigate that array. Hopefully the   
technology would be there to send them all home.  
  
One thing at a time, she told herself sternly. First she had   
to find Tom Paris and Harry Kim. There was no way she could   
go back without them. As much as Tom Paris annoyed her,   
there was no way that she could explain leaving him here to   
his father. As for young Ensign Kim, well he certainly   
didn't deserve that fate, she told herself; after all it was   
only his first mission... even if he did have lousy taste in   
picking friends.  
  
******  
  
Harry woke up the next morning feeling slightly nauseous and,   
with panicked remembrance, quickly gazed down at his arm. It   
was still there. The horrible growth thing hadn't gone away   
during the night. Groaning he sat up slowly and looked   
around. The Maquis woman, who from the ridges on her   
forehead looked like she had some Klingon blood in her, was   
still asleep in the bed next to him. Tom was still   
unconscious on the far side of the room.   
  
Testing his legs, Harry stood up off the bed and slowly made   
his way over to Tom. "Hey, buddy," he said softly. "How you   
feeling? Pretty stupid question, I guess, huh?" There was   
no answer from beneath the bandages. A sudden gasp from   
behind him made him swing around. The Maquis woman was   
sitting up.  
  
"Hi," he called out and she swung around on the bed to face   
him.   
  
She frowned at him fiercely. "Who are you?" she asked   
angrily. "What is this place?"  
  
"My name is Kim... Harry Kim. I'm an Ensign on the starship   
Voyager. I'm sorry; I don't know where we are. I woke up   
here the same as you."  
  
"Starfleet," the woman almost spat. "You were trying to   
capture us, weren't you?" She jumped off the bed and   
advanced towards him.  
  
"Yeah," Harry answered. "Consider yourself captured." He   
patted his gown and gave her a wry smile. "I know I have a   
phaser here somewhere."  
  
"I don't find this at all amusing, Starfleet," she hissed at   
him, glaring.  
  
"Um, no. Neither do I actually," Harry answered grimly. He   
looked back at Tom. Gods, he wished he'd wake up. He felt   
sure his friend would know how to handle this firebrand.  
  
"What did they do to him?" She was standing right next to   
him, peering down at Tom too.   
  
"He was hurt when we were brought here. The helm exploded.   
I'm not sure why he's here with us. They said he should   
recover."  
  
"Do you know why *we're* here then?"  
  
"No." Harry shook his head.  
  
"Do you know who these people are that are holding us   
prisoner?"  
  
Harry shook his head again.  
  
"Do you know why they did this to us?" She indicated the   
growth on her neck.  
  
Harry could only shake his head again. "I'm sorry. They did   
say that they would answer our questions later."  
  
"You don't know much, do you, Starfleet?"  
  
"Well, I know more than you, Maquis," Harry shot back   
angrily. "I don't think these people that are holding us did   
*this* to us. They don't even know what these growths are."  
  
"They don't? Well that's just great." She stormed over to   
the door and started pounding and kicking on it.  
  
"Hey," Harry raced over to her. "What's that going to   
accomplish?"  
  
She shrugged him away. "I want out of here, and I want out   
of here *now*," she yelled.  
  
Harry sighed. "Do you want them to sedate you again?"  
  
She turned back to glare at him. "You're right, Starfleet,"   
she admitted. "It's the Klingon half of me. It's just hard   
to control sometimes." She seemed a little embarrassed.  
  
"What's your name, Maquis?"  
  
"B'Elanna. B'Elanna Torres," she answered.  
  
"Nice to meet you," Harry said with a grin. "Well you   
already know my name. That's Lieutenant Tom Paris over   
there," he said pointing to Tom. "I hope he wakes up soon."  
  
B'Elanna followed him over to stand by Tom's bed again.   
"Paris? Any relation to Admiral Owen Paris?"  
  
"Yeah, he's his son. Do you know the Admiral?"  
  
"We've met," she answered briefly. "The son's a pilot, isn't   
he?"  
  
Harry nodded. "One of the best in Starfleet. He shouldn't   
have even been with us. He was just on loan for this   
mission. He's actually assigned to the Enterprise."  
  
B'Elanna whistled. "How old is he?"  
  
"A few years older than me. Why?"  
  
She shrugged. "It just seems a waste. How badly hurt *was*   
he?"  
  
"Pretty bad," Harry answered. "These people said they hoped   
he'd recover, but I'm not sure what they meant by that. I   
don't know whether they mean he'll be fully recovered or if   
they just mean he'll live. He had some pretty horrific   
burns. I'd feel so much better if he were back on Voyager in   
our sickbay. I don't think these people are very advanced   
medically."  
  
"Well, why are they holding us? Why don't they let us go?"   
B'Elanna marched over to the door again and banged on it   
harder. "Hey!! Is any one out there?" she shouted.  
  
Harry sighing raced over to her. "You've got to try and keep   
calm."  
  
"Calm?" Her voice rose even higher. "They're keeping us   
here against our will. We're sick, in case you hadn't   
noticed, and they're stopping us from getting proper medical   
treatment. Damn you all anyway!" she yelled. "Can't any one   
hear me?"  
  
A groan from the bed at the end of the room caught their   
attention. "All right! All right!" a voice said crossly.   
"Can't you keep it down? I'm trying to sleep here."   
  
"Tom!" Harry cried, rushing over to him. "You're awake."  
  
"Bit hard to sleep around here, Harry."  
  
"How do you feel?"  
  
"Fine. Why wouldn't I?" He attempted to sit up and Harry   
helped him the rest of the way. "Where are we?" he asked   
curiously. Before Harry could answer, he continued. "My   
face feels funny. Kind of numb." He brought his hands up to   
his face and noticed the bandages over them. "Wha... what's   
wrong with my hands?" He gasped as he realized that his face   
was also bandaged. "Oh, my god! What happened?"  
  
"The helm exploded. Don't you remember?"  
  
"N-No," Tom stuttered. "I remember that we were caught in   
some sort of displacement wave. I couldn't get us out.   
Everything went black. Then there was a bright light and   
a... I'm not sure. A crushing sensation, and I couldn't   
breathe properly. My chest hurt. Something was on top of me   
and there was a horrible smell."  
  
"Cavit," Harry said quietly. "He saved you. He threw   
himself at you and took the full brunt of the explosion   
himself. He died saving your life. It was the most heroic   
thing I've ever seen."  
  
Tom shook his head. "He barely knew me. Why would he do   
that?" Suddenly he snorted. "Of course. My father. If   
Cavit saved my life then the Admiral would owe him. He   
probably thought he'd be made full Commander."  
  
"But he died, Tom. He probably would rather have been a live   
Lieutenant Commander."  
  
"Yeah, well, of course. He didn't mean to get killed, Harry.   
That was just bad luck."  
  
Harry shook his head in disbelief, while B'Elanna snorted as   
she approached the bed. "You're a little young to be so   
cynical, aren't you?"  
  
"No, I'm just the right age," Tom answered flippantly.  
  
"Tom, a man died saving your life," Harry scolded. "You   
should at least be grateful."  
  
"I am, Harry. Its just... well... I feel awful that he died.   
I didn't even like him, but I still feel awful. Okay?"  
  
Harry nodded. "I understand."  
  
"Where are we anyway? I know this isn't sickbay. And aren't   
you going to introduce me?"  
  
"Oh yeah, sorry. This is B'Elanna Torres. She's one of the   
Maquis."  
  
"Really? Seems I've missed a lot. How do you do, Ms.   
Torres? I'd shake hands but, as you can see, my hands are a   
little tied up at the moment. I'm Lieutenant Thomas Eugene   
Paris, but you can call me Tom. And by the way, you're under   
arrest."  
  
"Very funny, Lieutenant. Your partner here has already done   
that joke."  
  
"Oh? Well, I must be rubbing off on him. Way to go, Harry."  
  
Harry grimaced slightly and sat down on the end of the bed.   
He explained everything that had happened to them since   
hitting the displacement wave, while B'Elanna paced around   
the room like a caged animal. By the time he was finished,   
Tom was swaying.  
  
"I think I need to lie down again. I feel kind of sick." As   
Harry leapt up to help him, he sank gratefully down into the   
pillows. "Harry?" he asked quietly. "Am I going to be all   
right? I mean, my face and hands..."  
  
"I don't know," Harry admitted. "We'll find out more when   
the Doctor comes back. Try not to worry and get some sleep."  
  
Tom nodded and closed his eyes. Just as Harry thought he was   
asleep he opened them again. "I nearly forgot. I didn't   
want to say anything before," he mumbled. "But you and the   
Maquis girl... you've got *things* growing on you. Have I?"  
  
"No, Tom. It's just B'Elanna and me, as far as I know."  
  
"What are they? Are you going to be all right?"   
  
"I don't know," Harry said again.  
  
"But do you feel sick or anything?"  
  
"Don't worry about me. You just get better." He stayed with   
Tom, patting his arm, until he finally dozed off, and then   
straightening up went over to B'Elanna. She was sitting on   
her bed, her head in her hands.  
  
"Are you all right? Do you feel sick or anything?" he asked   
her.  
  
She looked up at him and snarled. "I'm fine."  
  
"Oh. That's good. I feel kind of sick, myself. Have ever   
since I woke up. It's getting worse though." He climbed up   
onto his bed and curled up into a little ball.  
  
B'Elanna climbed off her bed and went over to him. Feeling   
his forehead, she announced. "You've got a temperature too."  
  
"Great. That's just great," Harry sighed.  
  
"Don't give in to it, Starfleet," she urged. "Fight it."  
  
The doors opened suddenly and B'Elanna whirled around to see   
the Doctor standing there. She growled softly, but remained   
where she was. "I hope you're felling better," he said.  
  
"I'm all right," B'Elanna said, "But Harry feels sick and he   
has a temperature."  
  
"Oh dear," the man said hurrying over. He quickly filled a   
hypospray and injected it into Harry's neck. "That should   
bring his temperature down and help with the nauseousness."  
  
"Thank you," Harry said sitting up. He felt better already.   
  
The Doctor went over to Tom. "Has he woken?"  
  
"Yes," Harry said, going over to them. "He was awake for a   
little while. He was fully coherent. He started to feel   
sick though, so I helped him go back to sleep."  
  
The Doctor nodded. "That is good. He will be weak and dizzy   
for quite some time, but should eventually recover."  
  
"Will his face and hands be all right? He wants to know."  
  
The Doctor seemed to hesitate. "We will not know for several   
more hours," he finally answered. He turned away from Tom.   
"Now, I know that you both must have many questions to ask of   
me."  
  
"That's for sure," B'Elanna said angrily. "Why are we   
prisoners?"  
  
The Doctor looked genuinely shocked. "You're not prisoners,"   
he answered. "You're honored guests. Please, I've taken the   
liberty of bringing you some clothes. If you'd like to get   
dressed and come with me, I'd be pleased to show you our   
world. We'll get something to eat as you must be hungry."  
  
"I don't like to leave Tom," Harry said.  
  
"The nurse will stay here, in case he wakens. Please. You   
have a lot of questions that I will try my best to answer."  
  
Harry looked towards B'Elanna, who nodded. "All right," he   
agreed. "But I don't want to be gone too long."  
  
******  
  
Tom woke to the sound of soft voices. Rolling over he   
groaned quietly as pain shot through his face and down one   
hand. Everything came flooding back to him as he remembered   
the helm explosion and Harry telling him they were being held   
prisoner in the Delta Quadrant.  
  
"We have to get to the surface and get help," a voice   
whispered urgently.  
  
"How? Do you know the way out of here? 'Cause I don't. And   
even if you did, I don't know how we could take Tom. I'm so   
weak, I can hardly support myself anymore." Tom recognized   
Harry's voice.  
  
"You might be willing to just lie down and give up, but I'm   
not," the other voice hissed. "In the Maquis we don't give   
in, we fight."  
  
"Till the last breath?" Harry asked with a small laugh.  
  
"If need be," B'Elanna Torres replied fiercely. "Now, are   
you with me or not?"  
  
"I'm with you." Harry's voice had grown stronger. "When we   
get out of here and contact Voyager, they'll send help back   
here for Tom."  
  
"That's if Voyager's still there," B'Elanna said grimly.  
  
"What are you talking about? Of course they're there.   
They'd never go off and leave us here."   
  
"Maybe they're all dead," she said flatly.  
  
"No," Harry answered vehemently. "That can't be true.   
They're there. They just don't know how to get us out.   
They're waiting above this planet. I just know it." His   
voice indicated that the alternative was unthinkable.  
  
B'Elanna shrugged. "If you say so. All I know is that I   
intend to keep going. This won't beat me."  
  
The pain in Tom's hand was getting worse and he couldn't help   
moaning. Harry was at his side immediately. "Tom. What's   
wrong?"  
  
Tom struggled to sit up. "It's okay. My hand hurts a bit,   
but I can cope." He took a deep breath. "I heard what you   
were saying. What did you mean about getting to the   
surface?"  
  
"We're underground." Harry relayed to Tom all that the   
Ocampa had told them. Tom was silent for a few moments   
trying to digest what Harry had said. He was also trying   
not to scream. The pain was unbearable. It felt like there   
was acid in the bandages trying to eat its way through his   
hand.   
  
Then the other hand started to throb as well. Moaning, he   
placed his hands up to his chest and started to rock back and   
forth. Now his chest was hurting as well.  
  
"Tom?" he heard Harry say, through a haze of pain.   
"B'Elanna, get the Doctor. Hang on, Tom. The Doctor's   
coming."   
  
Soon the Doctor's concerned face was peering down at him and   
a voice was inside his head telling him that he would be all   
right. The Doctor placed a hypospray against his neck and   
the pain started to recede. Soon it was the dull ache that   
he was used to.  
  
He smiled gratefully at the Doctor. "Thanks," he managed to   
say. "I needed that."  
  
The Doctor smiled at him reassuringly. "You'll be all right   
now. I'll send the nurse in to check on you later."  
  
He turned to Harry and B'Elanna, who were hovering behind   
him. "We'll keep him medicated for the next few days, just   
to make sure that doesn't happen again. Now, how are you   
both? Do you need anything?"  
  
"We're both feeling a little weak and dizzy," B'Elanna said   
quickly and the Doctor prepared another hypospray and   
injected it first into Harry's neck and then hers. "Let me   
know if there's anything else you need," he said. "You   
really should rest now."  
  
"Thank you, Doctor," B'Elanna said as he left. "Right," she   
turned to Harry as soon as the doors closed. "Now's our   
chance, while we're feeling a little better. They've got a   
library here. Let's go and see if they have any plans to the   
city there."  
  
Harry shook his head. "I don't think I should leave Tom."  
  
"He's fine now," she said in exasperation. "The nurse will   
keep an eye on him. Come on. I don't know how long we've   
got till the hypospray's effects wear off."  
  
"She's right, Harry," Tom called out. "I'll be all right.   
Go, while you can."  
  
"I don't feel right about it. What if the hypospray the   
Doctor gave you wears off?"  
  
"Then I guess I'll start screaming. Don't make me make it   
an order, Ensign. Go... now!"  
  
Harry sighed and headed for the door. "Yes, sir," he said   
with a small grin. "We'll be back soon."  
  
"Take your time, Harry. I'm not going anywhere. Hey, and by   
the way," he added with a grin. "Watch out for Torres. I   
don't think she's as tough as she makes out."  
  
Harry's eyes glittered in amusement, but B'Elanna, who was   
just about to step out the door, turned back with a glare.   
"You're not funny, Lieutenant. Humor is an immature way of   
dealing with your emotions."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes, *really*." Glaring at Tom once more, she stomped out   
of the room.  
  
"Ouch! I was just trying to lighten the mood."  
  
Harry shook his head. "See you soon."  
  
As soon as he had gone, Tom sank back down on the bed. He   
felt really awful. And what was with Torres anyway? What   
was she trying to prove? I give up, he said to himself.   
What with the Captain hating my guts and now this spitfire   
giving me a hard time, it's all too hard. I'm giving up on   
women, he decided. No more Tom the flirt, he solemnly   
promised himself, before shutting his eyes.  
  
"How do you feel?" a soft voice asked him a few minutes   
later. He opened his eyes again, to see the pretty Ocampa   
nurse smiling down at him. "I see your friends have gone for   
a walk. Would you like some company?" Tom promptly forgot   
his promise.  
  
******  
  
"He's asleep," the nurse said softly as Harry and B'Elanna   
entered the room a few hours later. "Did you have a good   
time?"  
  
"A good time?" Harry asked confused.  
  
"Tom said you were going to see some of the sights."  
  
"Oh! Yes, thank you."  
  
The nurse smiled. "You really should take it easy. Try to   
rest more. You both look exhausted."  
  
B'Elanna hissed at a sudden pain in her neck, and the nurse   
grabbed her arm. "Come and lie down," she said. She helped   
B'Elanna to her bed and couldn't help noticing the papers   
that B'Elanna had clutched to her. "What have you got there?   
It looks like a map." B'Elanna tried to hide it, but was too   
weak to move quickly enough. "It's a map of the tunnels. Why   
would you have that? Surely you're not thinking of trying to   
find the tunnels? You're in no state to be doing that."  
  
"Please," Harry pleaded. "We have to get to the surface.   
It's the only thing that will save us. You've done your   
best, but my ship can help us. We'll die otherwise."  
  
"I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do."  
  
"Can you show us the tunnels?" B'Elanna asked.  
  
"It's too dangerous," the nurse answered. "You'll be   
killed."  
  
"We're dying anyway," Harry reminded her.  
  
"At least this way we'll die trying to beat this thing,"   
B'Elanna added.  
  
"I don't know." The nurse seemed to be wavering. "I know of   
only one person who made it to the surface. And she's never   
been seen since."  
  
"Please," Harry begged. "Show us the tunnel she used.   
That's all you have to do. It's our only chance."  
  
"I could get into a lot of trouble." She smiled suddenly.   
"Very well. But you need to rest first. Gather your   
strength. I'll show you in the morning."  
  
"Thank you." Harry said in delight. "You've given us a   
chance."  
  
"Don't get your hopes up," the nurse warned. "The tunnels   
are a very dangerous place."  
  
******  
  
The next morning Harry woke up with a start to find B'Elanna   
already up and preparing to leave. "About time you woke up.   
I was about to wake you. The nurse brought us some tools to   
dig with. She'll be back in a minute."  
  
Harry got up and inspected the tools. "What's this?" he   
asked picking up a long instrument with what looked like a   
bulb on the end of it.  
  
"It's a light," B'Elanna informed him. "It has a switch on   
it somewhere, to turn it on. We're going to need it. The   
tunnels are very dark."  
  
"Oh, right." Harry looked across to Tom, who was just   
beginning to stir. Some time during the night the Doctor had   
taken off the bandages from around his face. "Hey," Harry   
smiled. 'You're looking better."  
  
Tom sat up and touched his face with his bandaged hands.   
"Yeah, the Doctor said that there was hardly any scarring.   
Tell me the truth. How bad is it?"  
  
Harry went over and studied his friend's face. His forehead   
was a mass of crisscross scars, all a livid red in color.   
There was a deep scar down one side of his face, from just   
below the ear, but it was a lot better than Harry had   
imagined.  
  
"Nothing that a dermal regenerator wouldn't fix," he told the   
pilot.  
  
Tom sighed in frustration. "I wish they had a mirror around   
here. I'd like to see for myself." He noticed B'Elanna   
studying his face also. "Okay, Torres. Let me have it. I   
know *you* won't spare my feelings."  
  
She shrugged in response. "Harry's right. A dermal   
regenerator will fix you up. Hopefully, you'll have one   
waving over you soon. Harry and I will be leaving soon."  
  
Tom nodded. Harry had told him their plans the night before.   
Holding out his arm to Harry, he said. "Help me up."  
  
Harry looked worried. "I don't think you should be getting   
up yet."  
  
Tom snorted. "I'm feeling a lot better today. Besides, I   
intend to come with you."  
  
Harry opened his mouth in surprise, while B'Elanna shook her   
head. "You'll slow us down," she said crisply.  
  
"I'll keep up," Tom said quietly. "I'm not staying here   
while you have all the fun."  
  
"I wouldn't call it fun, Lieutenant," B'Elanna snapped.   
"You'll fall behind and we won't be able to help you.   
Neither Harry or I are up to carrying you."  
  
"She's right, Tom. You should stay here. We'll send help as   
soon as we can. I promise. We won't leave you here."  
  
"I know that, Harry. Look, correct me if I'm wrong, but from   
what I remember you telling me, those things on you are   
killing you. You're slowly getting weaker. I'm slowly   
getting stronger. What if you can't make it to the surface?   
I might be able to help *you*"  
  
"With your hands bandaged like that you won't be much help,"   
B'Elanna said flatly.  
  
"Okay, so maybe I won't be able to dig, but I'll bet I'm in   
better shape than either of you two are at the moment. I   
won't compromise the mission, I promise you. You can leave   
me behind if I slow you down. Who knows? I might end up   
carrying *you*."  
  
B'Elanna snorted. "I don't think so, Lieutenant."   
  
"You can carry *me* if you like," Harry said with a grin, but   
sobered immediately. "Do you really feel up to this?"  
  
"Do you? None of us are in the best of health here. I won't   
lie to you. My hands hurt like hell, but I don't need them   
to walk. If I didn't think I could help, I wouldn't insist   
on coming."   
  
"All right then," B'Elanna suddenly decided. "But if you   
slow us down, we *will* leave you behind. Is that clear?"  
  
"Yes, Ma'am," Tom grunted as Harry helped him up. "Um, I   
think I need some clothes. I don't really want to go   
crawling through tunnels in this." He indicated the white   
gown he was wearing.  
  
B'Elanna rolled her eyes. "Hurry up then. Harry, I'll go   
and find the nurse while you help him get dressed. The   
sooner we get going, the better." She marched from the room.  
  
"Hey, Harry?" Tom said as soon as he was sure she was out of   
earshot. "Who put her in charge?"  
  
  
End Part Three 


	4. Chapter Four

Comparisons - Part Four  
By T'Pam  
  
  
For disclaimer, codes and rating, please see part 1.  
  
  
~^~  
  
Kathryn looked around in astonishment. This city was   
amazing. She didn't have time for sightseeing, however. She   
had to find Paris and the others and get them out of here.   
The pulsed signals from the Array had grown in both power and   
speed. The sounds hammered down on them almost constantly.   
She wasn't sure what it meant, but felt it wasn't a good   
sign.  
  
She turned to the young Ocampa standing next to her. "Where   
do you think they would be, Kes?"  
  
"They're probably at the medical facility," Kes answered.   
"Follow me." She took off almost at a run, with Neelix   
scurrying along beside her. Kathryn nodded to Chakotay and   
Tuvok to follow, and they hurried after them.   
  
She still felt mad at the Talaxian - Neelix - for tricking   
them. He'd had no intention of helping them find the   
others. It had all been a ruse to rescue Kes. All right,   
the girl had needed rescuing, that was for sure, but he   
should have told them the truth, right from the start. The   
Kazon were a rough, cruel people, and Janeway hoped that they   
wouldn't have to have any more dealings with them.  
  
She was extremely grateful that Kes had wanted to repay them   
for rescuing her and had insisted on helping them. Without   
her help they would never have been able to find the breaches   
in the barrier protecting the city, in order to beam in.  
  
Moving quickly through the city, they were soon at the medical   
center and Kes hurried inside. "Kes said to wait here for   
her," Neelix explained. "She'll find out whether they are   
here or not and be right back."  
  
Janeway nodded crisply and then looked up in surprise. Not   
that looking up was going to help. She wouldn't see   
anything. The pulses had stopped. Silence surrounded them.  
  
She slapped her commbadge. "Away team to Voyager."  
  
"Yes, Captain?" Rollins answered.  
  
"What's going on with the Array?"  
  
******  
  
Tom stumbled blindly along, determined to follow Harry, who   
was in front of him. He would keep up, no matter what, he   
told himself sternly. The tunnels seemed endless and Tom   
wondered how B'Elanna, who was leading them, knew which way   
to go. It felt like they were going around in circles   
although they did seem to be steadily going upwards.  
  
All of a sudden Harry stopped, and Tom bumped into him.   
"Sorry," he mumbled. Looking around he saw that they were in   
a huge cavern, and there were some stairs spiraling upwards.   
Looking up, you couldn't see the top of them, and Tom sighed.   
It appeared they were in for a long climb.  
  
B'Elanna hurried over to the first step and gingerly put her   
foot on it. "It seems sturdy enough," she mused. "Come on.   
Let's go."  
  
Tom took a deep breath. He was pretty sure if he rested for   
a while he would be able to climb them, but it didn't look   
like the Leader-from-hell believed in rest stops. He gritted   
his teeth. He'd promised he wouldn't hold them back, so he   
wasn't going to complain. He felt guilty enough as it was.   
B'Elanna carried the flashlight and some sort of digging   
tool, while Harry carried the other one. He felt like he   
should be carrying something too, but with his hands bandaged   
the way they were, he couldn't carry anything.  
  
They'd had to crawl in quite a few places to get through the   
tunnels, and that had been agony on his hands as it was. He   
couldn't help worrying about all the pain his hands were   
still giving him. He wondered just how badly damaged they   
were. There could be permanent muscle damage for all he   
knew. Pushing the thought aside, he started up the steps   
behind Harry.  
  
They hadn't gone far however, when Harry sank to his knees   
with a groan. "I'm sorry," he panted as Tom managed somehow   
to help him sit on a step. "I don't think I can go on."  
  
"Don't let it beat you, Starfleet," B'Elanna growled, coming   
back down the steps towards them.  
  
"He needs to rest," Tom said sinking down next to him. "So   
do I," he admitted.  
  
B'Elanna looked back up the steps and then down at them   
again. She seemed to be torn.  
  
"You go on if you want to," Tom told her. "We'll rest for a   
bit and catch you up."  
  
B'Elanna sighed and shook her head. "I guess it wouldn't   
hurt to rest for a while." She sat down too and as the   
flashlight played across her features Tom could see the   
exhaustion there.  
  
"Maybe I'd do better if I had a little Klingon blood in me,"   
Harry suggested.  
  
B'Elanna snorted. "Trust me. It's more trouble than it's   
worth."  
  
Harry shook his head, as if he didn't believe her. He gave a   
small choking sound. "I spent my whole life getting ready   
for Starfleet, and on my very first mission... I'm going to   
die."  
  
"You're not going to die, Harry," Tom said quickly. "I won't   
let you."  
  
B'Elanna nodded. "We're not finished yet. I know a few   
things that old Sneezy didn't teach in his survival course."  
  
"Sneezy?" Both Tom and Harry said at the same time.  
  
"Commander Zakarian," she explained. "Remember? He must   
have been allergic to everything."  
  
Harry looked at her in amazement, while Tom still felt   
confused.  
  
"You went to the academy?" Harry questioned.  
  
"Actually made it to the second year before we   
'mutually agreed' it wasn't the place for me." Although she   
tried to sound careless about it all there was pain in her   
voice. "I fit in a lot better with the Maquis."  
  
"You know, I never really liked Zakarian," Harry said   
suddenly. B'Elanna chuckled. They sat in silence for a   
while.  
  
"I was in my father's survival course," Tom said, wondering   
why he was telling them this. "I was in quite a few of his   
classes actually. No matter how hard I tried, it was never   
good enough. I had to be better than every one else, and he   
still wouldn't give me anything higher than a B. He didn't   
want any one to think he was playing favorites."  
  
"I'm sorry," Harry said squeezing his arm a little.  
  
Tom shrugged. "It doesn't matter. Long time ago now."  
  
"I was in two of your father's classes," B'Elanna said   
suddenly. "We didn't get along."  
  
Tom snorted. "I'd say that's a point in your favor."  
  
"He had very high expectations and was quite brutal to any   
one who didn't measure up."  
  
"Try being his son," Tom said bitterly and then flushed with   
embarrassment. What was he doing? They didn't want to hear   
any of this. "Sorry," he said gruffly and stood up abruptly.   
"We'd better get moving again."   
  
He hooked his arm under Harry's and helped him to his feet.   
"We'll keep resting every so often. Conserve our strength."  
  
To his surprise B'Elanna let him help her up as well and then   
they started climbing again. Slowly and steadily.  
  
******  
  
"They're not here," Kes announced as she came out of the   
medical center. "They *were* here, but no one's seen them   
for hours. The doctor's given me a full report on their   
medical conditions, if you'd like to read it." She handed   
Janeway a folder. "They're not in very good condition," she   
added.  
  
Kathryn quickly skimmed through the folder, with both   
Chakotay and Tuvok reading over her shoulder.  
  
"This doesn't look good," Chakotay murmured. He turned to   
Kes. "Does any one know where they might be now?"  
  
Kes shook her head. "They apparently went for a walk as   
soon as they woke up this morning, against the Doctor's   
wishes. They were most insistent."  
  
"I would surmise that they are trying to get to the surface,"   
Tuvok stated.  
  
Janeway nodded, just as a woman came hurrying out of the   
center. "Oh," she said breathlessly. "I was hoping you   
would still be here. The Doctor just told me you were asking   
about the strangers. I know where they went."  
  
"You do?" Neelix said excitedly.  
  
"Yes. They are in the tunnels. Please, come with me. I'll   
show you which ones."  
  
They quickly followed just as the ground shook beneath them.   
They stumbled and just managed to stop themselves from   
falling.  
  
"Voyager to Captain Janeway," Rollins voice came over her   
commbadge.  
  
"Go ahead."  
  
"Captain, the Array is firing some kind of weapon at the   
surface. It seems to be trying to seal the energy conduits."  
  
"Understood."  
  
The explosions continued to rain down around them as they   
hurried behind the Ocampa woman. People were panicking   
everywhere. It was absolute chaos. Finally they reached the   
entrance to the tunnels and the nurse pointed to the tunnel Tom   
and the others had taken. "They entered here," she told them.   
"Now I must get back to the clinic. There may be people hurt."  
  
"Thank you for your help," Janeway said. She was worried.   
Tuvok had put forward his theory that the Caretaker was dying   
and was sealing up the conduits to protect the Ocampa from   
their enemies. Rollins had also reported that the   
transporters could no longer get a lock on them. The   
breaches in the security barrier could no longer be found.   
How the hell were they going to get out of there?  
  
"They've gone the same way I did," Kes announced. "We can   
get out this way. There's a breach in the barrier." She   
pushed her way forward. Janeway hoped it was still there, as   
the weapons fire from the Array seemed to be doing a lot of   
damage.  
  
"Lead the way," she ordered.  
  
******  
  
As the first explosion echoed around them, Tom cursed and   
hooked his arm around the stair rail for support. The stairs   
seemed to rock and sway for long minutes before everything   
calmed down. Dirt fell from above them.  
  
"What was that?" Harry's knuckles were white as he clutched   
the rail for dear life.  
  
B'Elanna cursed in Klingon above them. "Keep moving," she   
said hoarsely.  
  
"I don't think I can," Harry said in despair.   
  
"Grab hold of me," Tom ordered. "That's not quite what I had   
in mind," he choked as Harry's arms came around his neck.   
"Hold onto my arm, and concentrate. One step at a time."  
  
Harry did as he was told and they were soon level with   
B'Elanna. They slowly started upwards again, only to be   
rocked by another blast. B'Elanna grabbed hold of Tom as he   
swayed, almost toppling backwards and taking Harry with him.  
  
"Thanks," he gasped. "That was close."  
  
"What the hell is going on up there?" she growled as more   
dirt fell around them.  
  
"Let's get up there and find out," Tom said grimly. The   
stairs groaned and shook as more blasts came, but each one   
seemed to be a little further away than the one before. Tom   
found it hard to keep his balance, with one arm hooked   
through the railing and Harry clutching his other one. They   
made slow progress up the stairs, and Tom became more and more   
worried as B'Elanna started to stumble at every step.  
  
Finally she sank down in front of him. "I can't do it. I   
can't make it."  
  
"What are you talking about?" he hissed. "Of course you   
can."  
  
"No, I can't," she said miserably. Tom looked around in   
agitation. Harry looked like he was about to pass out, so   
there was no way he could continue on his own.   
  
Tom squinted upwards again. "I think I can see the top of   
the stairs. Come on, Torres. I thought you said you weren't   
going to let this thing beat you."  
  
"I can't," she said again.   
  
Harry sank down next to her. "You go, Tom. Maybe you can   
get help."  
  
Tom shook his head. He wasn't going to leave them there. He   
really didn't trust these stairs. They were becoming more   
unstable with each passing minute. Helping Harry to stand   
once more, he looked down at Torres. "I'll be back soon,   
B'Elanna. Rest while you can, cause I'm going to need your   
help for the second trip."  
  
She gave a small nod, but didn't answer, and Tom wrapped one   
arm around Harry's waist and the other around the stair   
railing. "Come on, Harry," he said brightly. "Last one to   
the top is a rotten egg." With that he practically hauled   
Harry up the next step, hoping he'd made the right decision.  
  
Climbing as fast as he could and almost dragging Harry with   
him, Tom managed to make it to the top of the stairs.   
Another tunnel lay in front of them and Tom couldn't help   
groaning. He pulled Harry over to the sides of the tunnel   
and sat him back against the wall.  
  
"Stay here," he told him. "I'll be right back."  
  
Harry gave a small laugh. "Don't worry. I'm not going   
anywhere."  
  
Tom managed a small smile before crawling back over to the   
stairs. They were creaking alarmingly now and his stomach   
churned at the thought of going back down there again. The   
thought of B'Elanna waiting down there in the dark encouraged   
him to go on.  
  
"Tom, don't forget the flashlight," Harry called out weakly.   
Tom grimaced, wondering how he was going to carry it down.   
Harry had held it on the way up. The bandages on his hands   
were unraveling and spots of blood appeared on them both.   
But climbing up the rickety stairs in the dark was not an   
option.  
  
"Put it in my mouth," he said, crawling back over to Harry.   
Clenching the long handle between his teeth, he went back to   
the top of the stairs and started down them slowly. Their   
creaking grew louder and his stomach clenched almost as hard   
as his teeth were. Forcing himself to continue, he headed   
slowly downward hoping and praying that B'Elanna wasn't as   
far down as he thought she was.  
  
Finally he stumbled across her huddled body further up than   
he remembered, and he realized that she must have forced   
herself to continue. Kneeling down to her he touched her   
shoulder with one bandaged hand. The blood seeping through   
the ruined bandage was alarming, but he pushed the worry   
aside. He had enough to think about as it was.   
  
B'Elanna looked up at him in astonishment. "I didn't think   
you'd come back," she whispered. Realizing he couldn't speak   
with the light in his mouth she reached up and gently took it   
from him.  
  
"I never stand up a date," he said with a smile. Helping her   
to stand, the light fell across his ruined bandages and   
B'Elanna gasped in horror.   
  
"Your hands," she said.  
  
"Yeah, they're a bit of a mess I know. We've got more to   
worry about though. At the top of the stairs is another   
tunnel, and it looks like we'll have to crawl through it. I   
just hope that at the end of it is a door we can open or   
something, because we've lost the digging tools."  
  
B'Elanna nodded. She'd dropped one of them herself. The   
stairs groaned loudly and she shuddered.  
  
"Let's go," Tom said, wrapping his arm around her waist and   
once again hooking the other one through the railing. "These   
stairs are going to collapse sooner or later, and I don't   
fancy being on them when they do."  
  
His words spurred her on and he found to his surprise that   
she was practically dragging him up the stairs instead of the   
other way around. He smiled in relief. He really didn't   
have the energy left to hurl her up the way he'd had to with   
Harry.  
  
Her strength soon left her however and the climb became more   
and more difficult. He wondered if they'd ever reach the   
top.  
  
******  
  
"They're in here," Chakotay said triumphantly. He studied   
the beeping tricorder in his hand. "They went up these   
stairs."  
  
Janeway looked at the stairs in question. They really didn't   
look safe. They creaked and groaned loudly and looked as if   
they were about to collapse. She wondered how the missing   
crewmembers had even managed to make it this far. The   
twisting turning tunnels that they'd just made their way   
through had sapped most of her energy.   
  
"This is the only way out," Kes explained. "The stairs are   
very old and the blasts from the Array have damaged them. I   
don't know if they'll support us now."  
  
"We'll have to take the chance," Janeway decided. "We have   
to reach the others." She led the way up the stairs as fast   
as she could. The blasts seemed to be getting closer again   
and the stairs swayed dangerously. After climbing steadily   
for quite some time, Kathryn thought she saw a light flashing   
up ahead. "I think I see them," she called back to the   
others.  
  
Hurrying forward, her wrist light caught the shape of two   
figures struggling to reach the top. They both seemed very   
unsteady on their feet as they tried to support each other up   
the stairs. She realized she was looking at Tom and the   
Maquis woman - Torres, and wondered where Harry was.  
  
"Tom!" she called out, but the sound of the blasts drowned   
out her voice. She increased her speed, although the swaying   
made it hard to keep her balance. Kathryn was finally only a   
few steps away, and she could now see that Tom was pulling   
the Maquis woman up each step. "Tom," she called again.   
This time he heard her and swung around in surprise.  
  
"Captain," he breathed in relief. "Am I glad to see you."  
  
Chakotay pushed past her and took B'Elanna from Tom.   
Indicating to Neelix to give him a hand, he started up the   
steps with Kes leading the way.  
  
Tom seemed to lose his balance and Kathryn caught him as he   
pitched forward. "I'm glad to see you too, Lieutenant," she   
said softly as Tuvok helped to steady him.  
  
"Where's Harry?" she asked.  
  
"He's waiting at the top for us," Tom panted. "I couldn't   
manage them both at once, so I took him first then came back   
for B'Elanna."  
  
"I see," she said, grimacing as she noticed the state of   
Tom's bandaged hands.   
  
"Lieutenant Paris," Tuvok addressed Tom formally. "Please   
let me assist you, or if you prefer, I can carry you."  
  
"Oh! Well, Lieutenant... um."  
  
"Tuvok," Tuvok introduced himself. "I am Vulcan and can   
easily manage."  
  
"I'm sure you can," Tom said solemnly. "I wouldn't say no to   
a piggy back, though."  
  
"A piggy back?" Tuvok looked towards Janeway. "I believe   
the Lieutenant is delirious," he stated.  
  
Kathryn couldn't help smiling, even though the urge to get   
off these stairs was becoming insistent. She quickly   
explained what Tom meant, and then followed Tuvok as he   
started up the stairs with Tom on his back. The weight   
didn't seem to slow him down at all and Kathryn hurried to   
keep up with him. She looked up to see the top of the stairs   
coming into view and sighed in relief.   
  
A blast hit - too close for comfort - and the stairs tilted   
dangerously. They were all thrown off balance and grabbed at   
whatever they could to stop themselves from falling.  
  
Janeway fell backwards and held the stair railing in a death   
grip, as the steps lurched sickeningly. Her leg twisted   
beneath her at an unnatural angle and she realized, as the   
pain shot through her, that it was broken.  
  
Gazing up, she saw that Chakotay and the others had managed   
to reach the top before the blast had hit. Tuvok was lying   
at an awkward angle further up the stairs and there were   
great chunks of missing steps between them. She frantically   
looked around for Tom. Her heart missed a beat when she saw   
him.  
  
******  
  
Tom screamed in agony as his hands clutched the railings   
instinctively. He managed to hook his arms through them   
instead, just as the stairs beneath his feet gave way   
completely and he found himself dangling in mid air.  
  
Determined not to look down he looked to the side instead and   
saw Tuvok lying unconscious on the stairs above him.   
Twisting around he saw the Captain below him, one of her legs   
at an unnatural angle, clinging to the railings. Damn it!   
It didn't look like either of them would be able to help him.  
  
Realizing that the reason he could see was because some one   
was shining a light down at them from above, he turned back   
around again. The Maquis Captain and the strange alien were   
making their way carefully down the stairs to Tuvok, and Tom   
wondered whether he could hold on long enough for them to   
save him.  
  
"Don't worry," the strange little alien called out. "We're   
coming."   
  
Tuvok had started to come round and he sat up groggily.   
"Neelix, get him to the top of the stairs," the Captain   
ordered throwing himself down on his stomach and trying to   
reach across the gap in the stairs to grab hold of Tom. "Try   
and swing your body over towards me," he urged.  
  
Tom summoned up his strength to try it, when he remembered   
Janeway. If the Maquis Captain couldn't reach *him*, how was   
he going to reach *her*? "What about the Captain?" he heard   
himself asking.  
  
"Don't worry about me," he heard her hiss from beneath him.   
"Do as Chakotay says."  
  
Tom swung his legs out and felt his feet touch the stairs   
below. "Lieutenant, you're going the wrong way," Chakotay   
said urgently.  
  
"I'll be right there," he answered as he planted his feet   
firmly and stepped down to Janeway.   
  
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she said angrily.  
  
"It's your turn for a piggy back."  
  
"Are you crazy? There's no way you'll be able to manage with   
me as well. You can't reach Chakotay from here."  
  
"I can if I hang onto the railings with my hands and swing   
over. You'll have to grab us," he told Chakotay.  
  
Chakotay shook his head. "You *are* crazy."  
  
"Probably," Tom agreed. "Now, Captain, you'll have to hang   
onto me. Preferably not too tight around the neck. I think   
I might need to breathe to accomplish this."  
  
"There is no way that you'll be able to hang onto the   
railings with your hands in the condition they're in."  
  
"I'll only have to for a few seconds, and this time I'll be   
prepared for it." Tom's heart was racing and his stomach   
churned at the thought of the pain he was about to endure.   
There was no way he was going to let her know that though.  
  
"This is ridiculous. You'll go without me, Lieutenant.   
That's an order."  
  
"You'll have to put me on report when we get back to the   
ship, Captain."  
  
"Don't think I won't, Mister," she answered through gritted   
teeth as he pulled her up. She knew that the stairs they   
were on would collapse at any moment, so she was about to   
plummet down to her death no matter what.   
  
It just seemed a pity to take him with her. If it was the   
only way to get him back up there she would try it.  
  
******  
  
Chakotay watched in astonishment as the young Lieutenant took   
a deep breath and with Janeway's arms wrapped around his   
neck, reached up and grabbed the railing as far above his   
head as he could. He was tall, and that was a point in his   
favor, as he managed to grasp it a fair way up.  
  
The shock and pain on the young man's face was excruciating,   
as his feet lifted off the staircase and he swung his body   
towards him. They were almost within his reach and Chakotay   
leaned as far forward as he dared. He managed to grab hold   
of one of Tom's legs and hold him steady as Neelix, who had   
just returned, reached out and pulled Janeway across the   
yawning chasm.  
  
"I've got her," Neelix said triumphantly as she fell down   
beside him.  
  
"All right now, Lieutenant. Reach out for my hand." Chakotay   
still held his leg, but now needed Tom to slowly let go of   
the railing.  
  
"I can't," Tom said shakily.  
  
"Yes, you can. Just one hand. Let go with one hand and grab   
mine. I'll be able to pull you in then."  
  
"I can't," Tom repeated. "My hands are stuck."  
  
Neelix shone the light on Tom's hands and Chakotay went   
white. The bandages on his hands had unraveled completely   
and the torn and bleeding remains of the pilot's hands did   
indeed appear to be stuck to the railings surface.  
  
The staircase started to crumble behind them and with a   
scream, Tom wrenched his hand from the rail and into   
Chakotay's. He continued to scream as Chakotay with a final   
wrench, pulled Tom to him and dragged him up the stairs.   
They had only just made it to the top when the whole   
staircase collapsed, and he just managed to stop them both   
from going with it.  
  
Sitting Tom against the wall next to Harry, Chakotay took   
stock of their situation. The only way forward seemed to be   
a small tunnel that they would have to crawl through. He   
wondered how the hell he was going to get everyone through it.   
Both Torres and Kim were too weak to be of much help, and the   
Captain's leg was definitely broken. Paris was rocking back   
and forward, cradling his ruined hands to his chest, and Tuvok   
still seemed to be a little woozy.  
  
He turned to Kes. "How much further to the surface?"  
  
"Not far," she answered. "We have to go through that tunnel,   
but it's only a few feet deep and then the barrier is just   
behind it. We have to be very careful getting past the   
barrier," she warned. "If it touches you, it will burn your   
skin off."  
  
Chakotay ran his hands through his hair. "Wonderful," he   
murmured.  
  
"We can do it," she assured him. "The gap in the barrier is   
quite big. We can easily crawl through."  
  
Chakotay sighed and looked around at everyone. This was not   
going to be easy. "How are you feeling?" he asked Tuvok.  
  
"I am a little disorientated, but should be able to continue   
without assistance," Tuvok told him. Good, one down - four   
to go.   
  
"I think you should do what Tom did earlier," Janeway said,   
her teeth clenched as she tried to ward off the pain in her   
leg. "Leave some of us and come back once you've got the   
others to the surface. I can wait. After all, it's only my   
leg."  
  
"I can wait too," Tom said, his voice still shaky.  
  
"You're both in a lot of pain," Chakotay started to argue.  
  
"And Harry and B'Elanna are dying," Tom interrupted.   
"They're more important."  
  
"Tom's right," Janeway said, her command voice back at full   
strength. "You're wasting time."  
  
Chakotay nodded and helped B'Elanna to her knees as Neelix   
and Kes did the same with Harry. Somehow, sometimes pushing,   
other times pulling, they managed to get them through the   
tunnel and under the barrier.   
  
Once on the other side of the barrier they could stand up   
again and Tuvok felt strong enough to help Chakotay with   
B'Elanna. They moved slowly along the passageway, until   
suddenly coming to a dead stop. A wall of dirt and rubble   
blocked their way.  
  
"The blasts must have caved in the passageway," Kes told   
them. "The surface is just above our heads."  
  
Chakotay took out his phaser and indicated to Tuvok and   
Neelix to do the same. They pointed at the same spot on the   
roof above their heads and blasted a hole big enough to climb   
through. Soon, using the dirt and rubble to help climb up,   
they were on the surface of the planet.  
  
"Chakotay to Voyager."  
  
"Rollins here."  
  
"Four to beam directly to sickbay. Lock onto Lieutenant   
Tuvok's commbadge and energize."  
  
He and Neelix stepped back out of the way as the transporter   
beam shimmered.  
  
"We have them," Rollins voice announced.  
  
"Good. Neelix and I are going back in for Janeway and Paris.   
We'll let you know when we have them."  
  
"Yes, Sir."   
  
Chakotay smiled. It had been quite a few years since anyone   
had called him 'Sir'. The Maquis were a lot less formal.  
  
He tapped Neelix's arm. "Let's go."  
  
******  
  
"How are your hands?" Janeway asked quietly. They had   
listened to the sounds of the others making their way out   
until they could hear them no longer. She'd turned around to   
look at Tom and realized that he had stopped rocking.  
  
"Numb, actually. I can hardly feel them. I'm not sure if   
that's a good sign or not."  
  
"Probably not," Janeway remarked.  
  
Tom nodded. "Well, there's not much I can do about it."   
  
"Lieutenant, I want to thank you for what you did."  
  
"All part of the service, Ma'am," Tom said flippantly, but   
Kathryn reached out and held his arm.   
  
"I mean it, Tom. If it wasn't for you I'd be down the bottom   
of that shaft now, and you in the process damaged your hands   
even more than they were already. I can't dismiss that.   
I'll be putting a formal commendation in your file."  
  
Tom flushed a little. "Thank you, Captain. Actually, now   
that my hands don't hurt anymore I think I could crawl out of   
here. Do you want to get on my back?"  
  
Despite the pain in her leg, she smiled. "I think I'll wait   
for Chakotay."  
  
"Oh, well don't say I didn't offer."  
  
They remained in silence for a while until Tom suddenly   
sighed. "I doubt this is quite what Dad had in mind when he   
volunteered me for this mission."  
  
"I wouldn't have thought so... no."  
  
"Well, I'll say one thing for you, Captain, you certainly   
know how to put on an interesting mission. I've had more   
adventure in the past few days than I've ever had in the past   
three years on the Enterprise."  
  
"I would think that one mission of this kind would be enough   
in any one's life time. Wouldn't it?"  
  
"I suppose," Tom answered with a grin. His smile faded. "Do   
you think we can get back to the Alpha Quadrant?"  
  
Janeway didn't hesitate. "The answer is on the Array and   
we'll find it. We might not get back there today, but we   
*will* talk the Caretaker into sending us home. I know we   
will. He'll send us back, just so that he can get rid of me.   
He told me I was persistent, and it didn't sound like a   
compliment."  
  
Tom gave a small chuckle. "I can see why my Dad thinks so   
highly of you."  
  
"You can? I thought I crawled my way into his admiration?"  
  
Tom groaned. "Don't remind me. I am *so* sorry about that."  
  
It was Janeway's turn to chuckle. "I admit I was furious at   
the time, but I did see the humor in the situation   
afterwards."  
  
"You did? Well maybe you can show it to me."  
  
Kathryn chuckled again, amazed at how much she really liked   
this young man. "I thought you were a spoilt brat," she said   
suddenly. "When we first met at your graduation party, I   
disliked you intensely. I didn't give you much of a chance   
when you came on board Voyager and I'm sorry for that."  
  
"Well, I wasn't very nice to you when we first met. I don't   
blame you. I was hoping you might have forgotten though."  
  
"I never forget anything," Janeway replied. "My fiancé,   
Mark, told me to give you a chance. I should have listened."   
She gritted her teeth as her leg began to throb in earnest.  
  
"Tell me about your fiancé, if it's not too personal," Tom   
said, and she realized he was trying to keep her mind off the   
pain she was in. She obliged him, and soon she'd told him a   
very condensed story of her life.  
  
A light flashing through the tunnel made her sit up   
straighter. "They're back," she said in relief as Chakotay   
and Neelix crawled out.  
  
"Never fear, we'll have you out of here in no time," Neelix   
called out cheerfully.  
  
Tom leaned towards her. "This should be interesting," he   
murmured. "I wonder how they're going to manage it?"  
  
******  
  
Tom wished fervently that he hadn't asked that last question   
as Neelix pushed, tugged, pulled and dragged him through the   
tunnel towards the barrier. To make matters worse the little   
man kept up a stream of chatter that Tom found hard to follow,   
and continued to apologize every few seconds until Tom   
thought he would scream.  
  
"You really have to try some Jaballian mud cake when we get   
back, Lieutenant - sorry about that - you didn't hit your   
head did you? As I was saying, the cake is absolutely   
delicious, it's... whoops, sorry. You know, it would be   
easier if you just let me pull you along. It's moist and   
light as a feather. Kes loves anything I cook, of course,   
but... oh dear, I'm terribly sorry." He panted a little as   
he stopped to rest. "I remember I once found... Oh! My   
apologies, I've torn your dress thingy... robe? Well,   
whatever it is, I'm sure we can replimat another one. You   
can replimat... oh dear... is that the right word? You can   
replimat anything you want on Voyager. It's the most   
wonderful machine I've ever seen..."  
  
"Neelix! Is everything all right back there?" Chakotay   
called out anxiously from the other side of the barrier.  
  
"Why, yes, we'll be under in just a moment." He lowered his   
voice a little. "You know the Captain of the... um... what   
do you call it?.. Mackwick vessel is very nice. Don't you   
think? Nothing like I would have expected. I mean, after   
all he, is an outlaw isn't he? Obviously your Alpha Quadrant   
has very nice criminals."  
  
Tom burst out into loud laughter. Even though he hurt all   
over and could hardly move, this little man made him feel   
better somehow. Neelix somehow managed to maneuver him under   
the barrier, without scorching any more of his skin off, and   
helped him to stand up in the passageway on the other side.   
He was still laughing, rather uncontrollably by now, and he   
noticed both Janeway and Chakotay giving him concerned looks.  
  
"It's all right. I haven't lost my mind," he managed to   
chortle.   
  
"Of course not," Chakotay said as he hoisted the Captain up   
and started down the passageway. Tom sobered, and leaning on   
Neelix for support, followed.   
  
His vision was starting to become a little blurry now and   
there was a darkness pervading around the edges. He shook   
his head to clear it, but everything was fuzzy and unclear.   
He could hear Neelix still chattering away to him, but   
couldn't make out what he was saying. It almost sounded like   
he was talking from a great distance.  
  
He stumbled and Neelix staggered a little. By the time they   
reached the hole to the surface, Tom was barely conscious.   
As he looked up into the bright sunshine everything darkened   
around him and he decided to let the darkness comfort him   
this time.  
  
  
End Part Four 


	5. Chapter Five

Comparisons - Part Five   
By T'Pam  
  
  
For disclaimer, codes and rating, please see part 1.  
  
  
~^~  
  
"How is he?" Janeway asked as the EMH program hovered around   
Tom's bed. Tom was still unconscious.  
  
"There is severe muscle and nerve damage," he answered   
sternly. "May I ask just what he thought he was doing? He   
should not have been crawling around anywhere in the   
condition he was in, not to mention whatever else he was   
doing. There are extensive injuries."  
  
"He didn't have much choice at the time," B'Elanna said   
fiercely.   
  
"Well be that as it may, there may be permanent damage to his   
hands. The scars on his face will be easily taken care of   
with some deep tissue regeneration, but his hands are another   
matter."  
  
Tuvok commed the Captain. He was back on the bridge as he   
had only had a slight concussion. "Captain, the Kazon are   
insisting that we leave this area of space. They say they do   
not want us near the Array. They have threatened to use   
force if necessary."  
  
"Understood. I'm on my way."  
  
"Captain," the EMH interrupted her. "You shouldn't be   
walking on that leg yet."  
  
"Thank you for the advice," she answered, heading for the   
door.  
  
A sudden blast rocked the ship and Chakotay beckoned to   
B'Elanna. "Come on. We'd better get back to our ship. They   
may need some help."  
  
"I wouldn't advise that you leave yet," the EMH told   
B'Elanna.  
  
She nodded to Harry. "See you later, Starfleet," she said.  
  
Harry also got off of his biobed and headed for the door.   
"That goes for you too, Ensign." The EMH stood in front of   
Harry blocking his way.   
  
Harry neatly sidestepped. "Take care of Tom," he said.  
  
"Well, naturally. That is what I'm programmed to do," the EMH   
replied a little huffily.  
  
Neelix and Kes looked at each other and then promptly left   
the sickbay as well.  
  
"Well... really!"  
  
******  
  
When Tom woke up, he could see the Captain sitting on the   
chair next to his bed, dozing. He watched her for a few   
moments, feeling a little surprised to see her there. He   
lifted his hands up into his line of vision and saw that they   
were heavily bandaged once again. The movement caught the   
eye of the EMH, who hurried over.  
  
"Good morning, Lieutenant."  
  
"Hi! Doctor... um. I don't think we've met."  
  
"I am the emergency medical holographic program."  
  
"Oh! Where are the proper doctor and nurse?"  
  
"They are both dead."  
  
"You mean you're the only medical staff we have?"   
  
"That is correct. Do not concern yourself. I am programmed   
to treat any injury or disease. My program is a   
technological achievement of vast proportions..."  
  
"I'm sure it is," Tom interrupted. "But what about my hands   
and face?"  
  
"Of course. The scars on your face have been completely   
healed. The skin is still a little red, but that will fade   
in a day or two."  
  
Tom heaved a sigh of relief. "And what about my hands?"  
  
"Your hands will require further treatment. There has been   
extensive damage to the muscles and tendons."  
  
"How extensive?"  
  
"There has been severe nerve degradation."  
  
"I see. Well as soon as we get home they'll send me to the   
best medical facilities to deal with these types of   
injuries."  
  
"I'm afraid that won't be possible, Lieutenant."  
  
"Why?" Tom's voice rose a little and the Captain woke with   
a start.  
  
"We are stuck in the Delta Quadrant. So unless you prefer to   
wait for seventy five years for treatment, we are going to   
have to discuss other options."  
  
"Doctor," Janeway said sternly. "I wanted to break the news   
to him myself."  
  
Tom turned to her in confusion. "What's he talking about,   
Captain? Won't the caretaker send us home? Surely you   
haven't given up?"  
  
Janeway explained to him all that had happened on the Array   
and her heartbreaking decision to destroy it to save the   
Ocampa people from the Kazon.  
  
"So now we're stranded," Tom said flatly.  
  
"I'm afraid so," Janeway answered. "But I'm not giving up.   
We're looking for wormholes, spatial rifts, and new   
technologies. Anything to get us home faster. And don't   
forget... there's another caretaker out there. Maybe we'll   
get lucky and find her."  
  
"Not in the next few days or even weeks though, right?"  
  
"No, I wouldn't think so," she said sadly.  
  
"So where does that leave me? What about my hands?"  
  
"I can assure you, Lieutenant," the EMH quickly intervened,   
"I am more than capable of dealing with your injuries. I may   
have been meant for only short-term use, but I have been   
programmed with all the latest skills and techniques. Your   
treatment will be no different than what you would receive   
back on Earth. In fact, if I do say so myself, it may even   
be a little better."  
  
"Well that's a relief." Tom looked up at Janeway and smiled,   
but the look on her face sobered him immediately. "What's   
wrong?"  
  
"The nerves in your hands have been severely damaged..."  
  
"The Doctor explained all that," Tom interrupted. "But he   
can fix it. Can't you?" he asked, turning back to the EMH.  
  
The Doctor shook his head. "I can certainly give you back   
some movement and grip, but even our modern medical knowledge   
can not heal the type of extensive nerve damage that you have   
suffered. It will be impossible to restore your hands to   
their original state. I cannot say for certain how badly   
damaged they will remain, but you must prepare yourself.   
Your fingers will never have the dexterity that they had   
before."  
  
"I'm sorry, Tom," Kathryn said softly, placing her hand on   
his arm in a comforting gesture.  
  
"Are you saying I won't be able to fly again?" Tom choked   
out.  
  
"I do not believe so... no," the Doctor answered.  
  
Tom stared down at his bandaged hands as if he'd never seen   
them before. "You're wrong," he said quietly. "I *will* fly   
again. I'll get back full use of my hands and I *will* fly   
again."  
  
"That is not possible, Lieutenant."   
  
"Yes, Yes it is."  
  
"Lieutenant, as I have just explained..."  
  
"Doctor, please. Leave him alone for now. He needs to   
digest what you've told him."  
  
"Very well," the EMH said huffily, walking away.  
  
Tom looked up at her. "He's wrong, Captain. I know he is."  
  
Kathryn shook her head sadly. "I pray that he is, Tom. I   
pray that he is."  
  
******  
  
B'Elanna hurried along the corridor towards sickbay. Two   
weeks had gone by since she and the rest of the Maquis had   
been forced to join Voyager. After a rocky start she was   
now Chief Engineer, and loving every minute of it. The   
Starfleet crew seemed to have accepted her without too many   
problems... perhaps her friendship with Harry and Tom had had   
something to do with it, she mused.   
  
She was worried about Tom, but couldn't exactly say why. He   
had been working hard at his physical therapy sessions,   
determined to prove the Doctor wrong. So far he had been   
doing extremely well, better than the Doctor expected, and he   
could already use his hands to hold things and do easy tasks.   
  
He was bright and cheerful and full of good humor, which she   
knew she wouldn't be if she had been in his situation. She   
winced as she thought about how she would probably react if   
her hands had been injured the way Tom's had been. No... it   
wouldn't have been pleasant.  
  
She heard laughter as she entered the room and saw Harry   
sitting on Tom's bed with him. "Hey, Torres," Tom called   
out. "Look at this." He held up his hand and with a frown   
of concentration, wiggled his fingers. He then did the same   
with the other hand. He looked over at her and smiled, his   
eyes shining brightly.  
  
She smiled back and hurried over to give him a quick hug.   
"That's wonderful, Tom," she said as she perched up on the   
other side of the bed.  
  
"I think this calls for a celebration," Tom said with a   
laugh.  
  
"Well, I hope this celebration doesn't get as noisy as the   
last one," the EMH said, coming over to them.  
  
Tom sighed. "Don't worry, Doc. We'll keep it down."  
  
"Now let me see," the EMH continued. "This celebration is   
for wiggling your fingers. The last one was for being able   
to go to the bathroom by yourself, if I recall."   
  
"Yeah, well, that was pretty important to me too."  
  
"Yes, I must say I felt like celebrating as well. I no   
longer had to tag along behind you to, lend a hand... so to   
speak."  
  
Harry and B'Elanna burst out laughing, as Tom shot the EMH a   
dirty look. "Computer, deactivate the EMH."  
  
"Hey, Tom. That wasn't very nice," Harry scolded.  
  
"*He's* not very nice," Tom scowled. "I don't know who   
programmed him, but he could use a little work on his   
personality."  
  
"He *can* be a little rude at times," Harry admitted.  
  
"A little? You have no idea how bad he can get. And that's   
another thing. I don't think the Captain's going to get any   
one to be able to train with him. He's that impatient with   
every one. There's been four different trainees in here this   
past week and Jenkins, the last one, told me that he'd rather   
be thrown in the brig than work in here, so I doubt if he'll   
be back."  
  
"Well, I know I wouldn't like to work with him," B'Elanna   
said shortly.  
  
"Yeah, and I can't wait to get out of here. A few more days   
and I should be able to go back to my quarters."  
  
"Hey, that's great," Harry said. "We really *should*   
celebrate."  
  
"We are," Tom answered, getting out of bed and going over to   
the replicator. He came back cradling a bottle of something   
in his arms. "B'Elanna, could you please get some glasses?   
I don't trust myself to carry them yet."  
  
"Sure," she said jumping off the bed and coming back with   
three.  
  
"Tom," Harry said in a shocked voice. "That's a real bottle   
of champagne. We can't drink that in here."  
  
"Why not? We're celebrating."  
  
"Well yes, but I thought we were going to have lemonade or   
root beer or something. I shouldn't drink alcohol. I have   
this acid stomach."  
  
"Oh, for Pete's sake, Harry. Lighten up. We're in sickbay.   
I'm sure I can find something in here for your stomach. And   
anyway, we're talking about one glass. That won't hurt you.   
You're not on duty."  
  
"Tom's right, Harry. One glass won't kill you." B'Elanna   
popped the cork.  
  
"We're senior officers, B'Elanna. We could get called to the   
bridge at any moment, or to the briefing room or something."  
  
"Fine. Don't drink it then. But I'm going to," B'Elanna   
said with a toss of her head.  
  
Harry sighed and held out his glass. "Don't blame me if we   
get caught."  
  
"I'll take full responsibility," Tom said solemnly as   
B'Elanna poured the champagne.   
  
They all perched back up on the bed and clinked their   
glasses. "To wiggly fingers," Tom said.  
  
"To wiggly fingers," B'Elanna and Harry echoed.  
  
They sipped their champagne and Tom started to laugh.   
B'Elanna soon joined him and then Harry did also.  
  
"Well, this looks cozy."   
  
Harry almost choked as Chakotay walked up to them.   
"C-Commander," he stuttered, jumping off the bed and trying   
to stand at attention.  
  
"At ease, Mr. Kim. May I ask what's going on here?"  
  
"We're celebrating," Tom answered. He didn't seem too   
perturbed that the First Officer had just caught them all   
drinking alcohol in the sickbay.  
  
"I see." Chakotay picked up the bottle of champagne and   
studied the label. "With only the best too."  
  
Tom nodded. "It was my idea. Don't blame them."  
  
"I see," Chakotay repeated. He looked at them all in   
silence. "Somehow you forced them both to drink this," he   
finally said.  
  
B'Elanna snorted. "Don't report Harry, Chakotay. We did   
kind of talk him into it."  
  
"I take full responsibility for my own actions, Sir," Harry   
said, standing stiffly at attention.  
  
"Naturally," Chakotay answered. "May I ask just what it is   
you're celebrating?"  
  
"I can wiggle my fingers, Sir." Tom sounded a little worried   
himself now. He wiggled them to demonstrate.  
  
Chakotay broke into a wide smile. "That's great, Tom." He   
looked over at Harry. "For the sake of the Spirits,   
Ensign... relax. I'm not going to report any one. Although   
I *will* ask you not to make a habit of this."  
  
"Yes, Sir. Thank you, Sir," Harry gulped gratefully.  
  
"Why don't you join us?" Tom said, indicating the bottle.  
  
Chakotay shook his head with a smile. "I'm willing to turn a   
blind eye, but I'd better not implicate myself."  
  
"Good judgment call, Commander." They all started in   
surprise.  
  
This time Harry *did* choke as the Captain came up to them.   
B'Elanna pounded him on the back.   
  
"Captain! Maybe you'd care to join us instead?" Tom   
recovered quickly.  
  
"I don't think so, Lieutenant. I think the Commander has the   
right idea. I'm going to pretend I didn't see this. Just   
this once. Is that understood?"  
  
"Yes, Ma'am."  
  
Janeway smiled and squeezed Tom's shoulder. "I'm pleased to   
hear your good news. Your hands seem to be improving every   
day."  
  
Tom nodded. "They are. I'll be back at the helm in no   
time."  
  
"You will?" The Captain sounded surprised. "Did the Doctor   
tell you that?"  
  
Tom snorted. "Him? He's the voice of doom. I've decided to   
ignore him."  
  
B'Elanna noticed that the Captain looked a little worried,   
just as she had felt all along.  
  
"I don't think that's a very good idea, Tom. It's important   
that you keep a positive attitude, but you should still heed   
his advice."  
  
"If you say so, but he says I won't be able to fly again, and   
I'm not listening to *that*."  
  
"I see. Well it's probably a little too soon to say anything   
for certainty."   
  
"Well, I can. I'd rather be dead than not be able to fly   
again." Tom's voice was intense. The light cheery   
atmosphere seemed to have darkened and B'Elanna saw the   
Captain and Chakotay exchange glances.  
  
"Tom, don't say things like that," Harry urged, his   
discomfort in front of the Captain and Commander forgotten in   
his anxiety. "You don't mean it."  
  
"Yes, I do. Flying is everything to me," Tom insisted.   
"It's all I've ever done. All I've ever wanted to do. It's   
all I *can* do."  
  
"That's not true," Janeway said crisply. "There are plenty   
of things you can do."  
  
"No, there isn't, Captain. It's the only thing I was ever   
any good at." He looked down at his hands and then back up   
at the group of them, forcing a smile. "Hey, I'm sorry. I   
didn't mean to get all maudlin on you. I don't know what   
started all the gloomy talk. I *will* fly again and that's   
all there is to it."  
  
There was an uneasy silence. "I'm sorry," Tom apologized   
again. "I've really spoilt the mood, haven't I?"  
  
"No, of course not," B'Elanna said brightly. "Come on,   
Harry, drink up."  
  
"We'll leave you to it," Janeway said with a smile, squeezing   
Tom's shoulder lightly again. She motioned for Chakotay to   
join her and they left the sickbay together.  
  
As soon as they left, Harry turned worriedly to Tom. "You   
didn't really mean what you said, did you, Tom? That you'd   
rather be dead?" He was deeply upset. B'Elanna felt sorry   
for him. The three of them had formed a very close-knit   
bond.  
  
"Of course he didn't," she glared at Tom. "He was just being   
melodramatic."  
  
Tom hesitated a little, so she frowned at him fiercely. "I   
didn't mean the bit about I'd rather be dead," he reassured   
them, "but I did mean the rest of it. I really can't do   
anything else but fly."  
  
"That's because it's the only thing you've ever done," Harry   
said quickly.   
  
Tom started to say something but then stopped. "What are we   
talking about this for?" He smiled suddenly. "We've got a   
bottle of champagne here to finish. If I can wriggle my   
fingers today, imagine what I might be able to do with them   
tomorrow."  
  
B'Elanna shook her head. "I can. And I really rather wish I   
hadn't," she said dryly.  
  
Tom burst out laughing, and B'Elanna and Harry soon joined in.   
  
******  
  
"I think we could have a problem with him," Kathryn said as   
they made their way to the turbolift.  
  
Chakotay nodded in agreement. "There really is no way he'll   
be able to fly again, is there?"  
  
"Not according to the Doctor. He has tried to explain that   
to Tom many times, but Tom refuses to accept it."   
  
"I suppose it would be a little hard. He sees himself   
improving every day. In his mind, why wouldn't he keep on   
improving?"  
  
Kathryn nodded. "I know. But soon he's going to reach the   
point that there can be no more improvement. I'm not sure   
how he's going to handle it."  
  
"Do you think he meant it, when he said that he would rather   
be dead?"  
  
Kathryn sighed. "I'm not sure. But I have a horrible   
feeling that he did. Flying really is everything to him. It   
really *is* all he's ever done. All he's ever prepared for."   
She shook her head sadly. "Some of the stories I've heard   
about his flying skills are unbelievable. I never got a   
chance to see any of them, of course, but he is acknowledged   
as the best pilot in the fleet."  
  
Chakotay followed her into her ready room. "It's going to be   
very hard for him."  
  
Janeway sat down heavily in her chair and Chakotay pulled up   
a chair across from her. She nodded thoughtfully. "Did you   
know that he could pilot a shuttle all by himself, and better   
than most of the cadets at the academy, by the time he was   
five?"  
  
Chakotay whistled. "A child prodigy."  
  
"I would say so, yes. Although he has only ever bothered   
about flying, I suspect he is highly intelligent. We need to   
find something else for him to do. Something that doesn't   
involve his hands so much, well at least, not to the same   
degree as flying does."  
  
"I'll see what I can come up with. If we can help him to   
feel useful, it may help his spirits."  
  
******  
  
Tom watched in concern as Neelix gasped and struggled for   
breath as the Doctor battled to stabilize him. Only the   
night before, the Talaxian had visited him full of his plans   
to make a galley in the mess hall. The ration packs were not   
too popular with the crew and the replicator had to be used   
sparingly. Neelix, who said he loved to cook, wanted to help   
out. He wanted to give something back to the people that had   
given him so much, he said.   
  
Tom had thought it was a thoughtful gesture, but had warned   
that he should get permission from the Captain before making   
any drastic changes. Neelix had wanted to surprise her,   
however, and Tom had joked that she would certainly be   
surprised.  
  
Now Neelix was fighting for his life. The away mission, that   
the Talaxian had been so excited about, had gone horribly   
wrong. Tom listened in horror as the Doctor explained to   
the Captain that Neelix's lungs had been removed and he would   
die if they could not be retrieved.  
  
Chakotay raced around trying to help the EMH as best he   
could, but it was obvious he was out of his depth. Tom, who   
had thought it was best to keep out of the way, hurried over   
to him. He pointed to a strange oblong instrument in the   
drawer that Chakotay was sorting through. "There, Commander.   
That's what the Doctor's talking about."  
  
Chakotay looked up at him in surprise. "Are you sure?"  
  
Tom nodded. "Positive."  
  
"Thanks." Chakotay grabbed the instrument and raced back to   
the biobed. Tom went back over to his own bed and sat down   
again, wishing he could do more. He waited until the Captain   
had left to take a team back down to the surface and Neelix   
was stabilized for the moment, and then asked if he could do   
anything to help.  
  
The Doctor looked him up and down for a moment before   
replying. "Actually, Lieutenant, there is. You can monitor   
Mr. Neelix's life signs for me. You seem to know a little   
more than the Commander here and I'm sure your hands are up   
to pushing a few buttons here and there."  
  
Tom nodded eagerly and jumped down from his bed.   
  
"Well, I don't think there's anything I can do here so I'll   
get back to the bridge," Chakotay told them. He gave Kes's   
arm a comforting squeeze before hurrying from the room.   
  
"Really, what it is to get good help around here," the EMH   
remarked with a sniff.  
  
"Well, you don't make it too easy you know, Doc. You just   
expect everyone to know everything and that's not how we poor   
non-computer programs work," Tom commented. "We have to be   
taught... shown things."  
  
"Of course," the Doctor sniffed. "I realize that. The   
Captain has already explained to me that I must train   
replacement medical staff."  
  
"Yeah, train them... not terrorize them. You're not a very   
patient person."  
  
The Doctor looked a little surprised. Whether it was because   
Tom had called him a person or he was trying out the concept   
of patience, Tom wasn't sure. He turned back to watch the   
monitor in front of him.  
  
"If I was sent some one that was trainable, I'm sure I would   
be patient." The EMH had to have the last word. Tom decided   
to ignore him.  
  
******  
  
Over the next few days Tom helped nurse Neelix and then Kes,   
much to their relief, as they recuperated from their lung   
transplant. The EMH's bedside manner was terrible. Tom had   
been discharged from sickbay, but spent most of the time   
there anyway while the Doctor grumbled and complained about   
his inexperience. Nevertheless, he continued to find things   
for Tom to do that he could handle.  
  
Kes was released after a couple of days and Neelix the   
following week, but still Tom gravitated towards sickbay. He   
had to go there for his physical therapy and tended to stay   
there once he was finished. It was boring hanging around in   
his quarters when all his friends were working. He couldn't   
wait to get back to the helm.  
  
And then came the day that Chakotay came to see him about   
becoming a field medic. Tom had been surprised at the time.   
"Isn't Kes training to help the Doc? I've just been filling   
in time down there."  
  
"Kes *is* training to become his assistant, but the Captain's   
not keen to send her on away missions. You'd be perfect for   
the role. Even the Doctor thinks so. He suggested it   
actually. He says you're spending a lot of time down there   
anyway and have already learnt quite a bit. The Doctor needs   
more help than Kes is able to give him. Kes has to divide   
her time between sickbay and airponics as it is. That's not   
to mention when she's not helping Neelix in the kitchen."  
  
"I know that Kes is always on the go, but I don't know   
whether I'd be much good. There's a lot of things I can't do   
at the moment because of my hands."  
  
"He's not expecting you to do microsurgery or anything. Just   
basic first aid, and your hands can cope with that now. Once   
your hands have improved, your training will extend as well."  
  
Tom shook his head. "I don't know, Chakotay. I want to help   
out where I can, but once my hands are healed I'll be back at   
the helm full time. It would be wasting the Doc's time. He   
would have to get some one to replace me, anyway."  
  
"Maybe you could do both part-time. It will give you   
something to do for now, and the medic training will certainly   
come in handy. Who knows, you might even like it better than   
flying?"  
  
Tom laughed. "No way, Commander. I will admit I like   
helping in sickbay - helping people - but flying is a part of   
me. There's nothing better to me and never will be."  
  
"I'm a pilot too, you know, Tom, and I've found there's more   
to life than flying."  
  
Tom frowned, wondering why Chakotay was telling him this.   
"Maybe for you, Commander, but not for me."  
  
Chakotay sighed. "Well, are you willing to give this medic   
thing your best shot? We really need you."  
  
Tom nodded. "Sure. There's one thing though. Harry's   
pretty good with computers. Do you think he could reprogram   
a bit nicer personality into the Doc? He's a bit hard to   
take sometimes."  
  
Chakotay smiled. "Kes is already working on that. She   
thinks the Doctor can learn to become a nicer person. She   
believes that between the two of you, you can teach him."  
  
Tom laughed. "It'll certainly be interesting. I still think   
it would be easier just to reprogram him though."  
  
"His program is very complicated. It's not a good idea to   
start messing around in it."  
  
Tom sighed. "Well it was worth a try. When do you want me   
to start in there?"  
  
"How about, right now?"  
  
  
End Part Five 


	6. Chapter Six

Comparisons - Part Six  
By T'Pam  
  
  
For disclaimer, codes and rating, please see part 1.  
  
  
~^~  
  
The days and then weeks went by as Voyager continued on its   
quest for home. Tom continued to work diligently in sickbay   
and was quite pleased with his progress. He had even learnt   
to appreciate the Doctor's rather dry sense of humor,   
although he and Kes seemed to be the only ones who could see   
it. The EMH had even told him that he might be of some use   
after all, which was high praise indeed.   
  
The only cloud in his otherwise bright horizon was the lack   
of improvement in his hands. He hadn't been able to notice   
any discernible difference in them for over a week now and   
was becoming seriously worried. He had known it would take   
time and a lot of hard work, and he was prepared to be   
patient, but nothing seemed to be happening at all.   
  
On this particular day he had gone down to sickbay a full   
hour before he was due to start his shift, hoping that the   
Doctor would help him plan a new therapy program. As he   
entered sickbay he could hear voices coming from the Doctor's   
office.  
  
"I think you should talk to him, Captain. He is becoming   
more agitated each day, but refuses to listen to me."  
  
"If you think I can help, but I know the Commander has   
already tried to speak to him on more than one occasion."  
  
Tom wondered idly who they were talking about. He decided   
to go and clean up the cupboard on the other side of the room   
while he waited, to give them a little privacy. He'd just   
turned around when the Doctor's next words froze him in his   
tracks.   
  
"Lieutenant Paris is determined to pretend that he will fly   
again. I thought that by having him work in here and   
increasing his medical knowledge, he would gradually accept   
the truth of his situation for himself. But this has not   
been the case. He refuses to accept that his hands will   
never be any better than they are now. He continually speaks   
of when he will fly again. It's a fantasy that has kept him   
going until now."  
  
"No," the protest was ripped from his throat.  
  
A hand on his shoulder made him turn around. "Tom, we didn't   
realize that you were here. I'm sorry that you heard that,   
but perhaps it's for the best. It's time to face the truth."  
  
"No," Tom protested again. "How can you listen to him,   
Captain? He's wrong. He doesn't know what he's talking   
about. He's not even a real Doctor. He's just a hologram."  
  
"Insulting me will not change anything, Lieutenant."  
  
"Shut up!" Tom yelled.  
  
Janeway took a step towards him, but Tom took two steps back.   
"Tom, please come and sit down. We need to talk about this."  
  
"There's nothing to talk about. It's not true." Tom backed   
away a few more steps. This wasn't happening. It was a   
nightmare. He'd wake up soon.  
  
The Captain stepped towards him again and he bolted for the   
door. He didn't know where he was running to. He just knew   
he had to get away.  
  
******  
  
"Well, I do not believe that went particularly well," the EMH   
commented and Kathryn turned around to glare at him.   
  
She headed for the door. "I'll find him and try to calm him   
down," she said.   
  
Hurrying through the ship she was alarmed when the computer   
announced that Tom was headed for the shuttle bay. Slapping   
her commbadge she ordered. "Tuvok, meet me in the   
shuttlebay. We could have a problem."  
  
"At once, Captain," Tuvok replied calmly.  
  
Tuvok arrived at the shuttle bay doors the same time as she   
did. She quickly told him what had happened, and they entered   
the room carefully.   
  
"Tom?" Kathryn called out. "We know you're here. Come out   
where we can see you." There was no answer.  
  
Tuvok indicated a shuttle at the far end of the room, and   
they hurried over. He had a keen sense of hearing and   
Kathryn guessed that he must have heard something.  
  
Cautiously climbing into the shuttle they saw Tom sitting at   
the helm. "Tom?" Kathryn came up behind him.  
  
He didn't turn around. "I was going to take the shuttle and   
run away." He gave a small laugh, but there was no humor in   
it. "I was always running away when I was a kid."  
  
Kathryn squeezed his shoulder and sat down in the co-pilots   
seat.  
  
"My fingers won't stretch far enough to fly properly. And   
they're never going to be able to, are they? This is as good   
as they'll get."  
  
"I'm sorry, Tom."  
  
"The Doctor was right you know. I knew it all along. I just   
didn't want to accept it." He held his hands up. "They're   
useless. I'm useless."  
  
"No, Tom. That's not true. There are plenty of other things   
you can do. The Doctor says you have the makings of an   
excellent field medic and nurse."  
  
"I can't do that properly either. My hands haven't got   
enough feeling in them, and some of the equipment I can't even   
use."  
  
"There will be limitations, I know."  
  
Tom snorted. "Let's face it. I wouldn't be much help."  
  
"Well the Doctor seems to think otherwise."  
  
"He's just saying that. He doesn't mean it."  
  
"Oh? I've never known the Doctor to say anything he didn't   
mean. I realize that I don't know him as well as you do, and   
that Kes and you have managed to soften his attitude a   
little, but I still don't think he's capable yet of saying   
something that wasn't true, just to make some one feel   
better."  
  
Tom sighed. "I guess you're right."  
  
Kathryn squeezed his arm. "I know it's going to be hard for   
you. I know how much flying means to you, but there are   
other things. Now's your chance to find them."   
  
"I'd like to go back to my quarters now, if it's all right?"   
Tom asked quietly.  
  
"Of course," Kathryn answered softly.  
  
******  
  
Over the next few days Tom kept to himself as much as   
possible. He did his duty shifts in sickbay and spent the   
rest of the time in his quarters. Even Harry and B'Elanna   
didn't see him. After three days they decided that he'd been   
left alone to brood long enough and went to his quarters as   
soon as they'd finished their shifts.  
  
"Hi, Tom" Harry said brightly as their friend answered the   
door. He was a little surprised to see Tom wearing the blue   
uniform of sciences instead of the red one he usually wore.   
  
"Hi," Tom answered. He didn't step back, as he usually would   
have, to let them in.  
  
B'Elanna pushed past anyway and Harry sheepishly followed.   
"We thought we'd come and see how you're doing," he explained.  
  
"I'm fine," Tom said, still standing by the door.  
  
"What's with the change in uniform?" B'Elanna demanded.  
  
"It seemed more appropriate," Tom answered shortly.  
  
"This place is a bit of a mess, isn't it?" B'Elanna screwed   
her nose up.  
  
"It's as neat as I can manage these days," Tom said, a touch   
of anger in his voice.  
  
Harry immediately felt guilty. "We can help you clean it   
up," he offered.  
  
"No, it's all right, I can do it." Tom stepped away from   
the door. "I've just been kind of tired lately. In fact,   
I was just about to go to bed now."  
  
"Tom, it's not even eighteen hundred yet," B'Elanna   
protested.  
  
"Well, it's been a busy day. I'm tired."  
  
"We're going to the holodeck tonight and wondered if you   
wanted to come with us?"  
  
Tom shook his head at her. "I don't think so."  
  
"Come on, Tom. It will do you good," Harry pleaded.  
  
"Thanks, but I really don't feel like it."  
  
Harry tried again. "You'll feel better once you get there.   
There are all sorts of great programs in the data base."  
  
Tom shook his head. "I don't want to."  
  
B'Elanna growled angrily. "You're coming and that's the   
end of it."  
  
Tom crossed his arms in front of his chest and glared at   
her. "What's the matter with you, Torres? Can't you take   
no for an answer?"   
  
She glared back at him. "You're not holing up in here,   
feeling sorry for yourself, any longer."  
  
"I am *not* holing up here," Tom hissed angrily. "Will you   
get out of here and leave me alone?"  
  
"No!"  
  
"B'Elanna, maybe we should..."  
  
"Shut up, Harry! We're going to the mess hall for something   
to eat and then we're going to the holodeck... and *he's*   
coming with us. Even if I have to carry him."  
  
Tom faced her angrily. "Just try it, Torres, and see how   
far you get."  
  
Harry nervously stepped between them. "I really don't think   
this..."  
  
"Harry... shut up!" B'Elanna pushed him out of the way.  
  
"Hey! Don't push Harry!"  
  
"I will if I want to."  
  
"Hey, now wait a minute," Harry stepped between them again   
and B'Elanna pushed him away again.  
  
"Stop pushing Harry around," Tom yelled furiously.  
  
"And who's going to stop me?"  
  
"I will!"  
  
"I seriously doubt that, Paris." Before Tom even had time   
to blink she hurled herself at him and tackled him to the   
floor.  
  
"B'Elanna!" Harry cried out, trying to pull her off of Tom,   
while he struggled beneath her.  
  
B'Elanna started yelling in Klingon and Tom was yelling in   
all sorts of different languages.   
  
"Stop it!" Harry shouted as loud as he could, trying to be   
heard above the two of them.  
  
"What the hell is going on in here?"  
  
******  
  
Kathryn slowly made her way to Tom's quarters. She was   
worried about him. The Doctor had reported that Tom had   
barely spoken over the past few days, and no one else had   
even seen him. She wanted to make sure he was all right.  
  
As she neared his quarters she could hear raised voices and   
by the time she reached his door all hell seemed to have   
broken loose. Without hesitating she overrode the code on   
the door and hurried inside. The sight before her froze her   
in her tracks for a few seconds. B'Elanna had Tom down on   
the floor and Harry was trying to pull her off of him.   
  
Janeway's voice seemed to ring around the room and the three   
on the floor, stilled - as one - and then hastily scrambled   
to their feet.  
  
"C-Captain," Harry stammered, helping Tom to stand up. The   
three stood stiffly at attention before her.  
  
"Can some one please tell me what's going on?" she asked   
coldly.  
  
"It's my fault, Captain. Please don't blame them."  
  
"I see." Kathryn studied Tom for a few moments. "It   
appeared that Lieutenant Torres was attacking you and   
Ensign Kim was trying to stop her. May I ask what you did   
to incur her wrath?"   
  
Tom flushed a little. "It's kind of personal, Captain."  
  
"Really? I'm still waiting."  
  
Tom flushed even brighter. "I wouldn't go to the holodeck,"   
he finally mumbled.  
  
"Well that sounds like a good reason to attack a fellow   
officer," Kathryn said sarcastically, glaring at B'Elanna.  
  
B'Elanna looked mortified. "I'm sorry," she said shakily.   
"I lost control."  
  
"It would appear so. I will not have senior officers   
behaving in this way. Is that understood?"  
  
"Yes, Captain," all three answered together.  
  
"Ensign Kim, please take Lieutenant Paris into the bathroom   
and help him to clean up. His lip is bleeding."  
  
As soon as they were gone she indicated to B'Elanna to sit   
down on the couch. Glancing around, she noticed for the   
first time just how messy Tom's quarters were. "It would   
appear that Tom hasn't bothered to do much housekeeping."  
  
B'Elanna seemed a little surprised, but answered. "He says   
he's been too tired. Harry and I were going to give him a   
hand, but he didn't want us to."  
  
Kathryn sat down on a chair opposite her. "I know you care   
about Tom, but what do you think you were trying to do?"   
  
B'Elanna sighed. "He just made me so mad. Harry and I have   
been worried sick about him. We thought he needed to get out   
a bit. Get back into life, so to speak. He refused, and I   
just lost it. I'm so sorry, Captain. The Klingon part of me   
is hard to control sometimes."  
  
"I understand that, B'Elanna, and I know you wouldn't have   
reacted so strongly if you didn't care so much. The Klingon   
blood in you will always make you a little volatile and I'm   
willing to accept that. It's part of who you are, but you're   
going to have to learn some restraint. Learn to control your   
temper a little. We can't have you attacking every one that   
displeases you. It would become rather disrupting to say the   
least. I'm wondering if Lieutenant Tuvok may be able to help   
you."  
  
"I'd be willing to try, Captain."  
  
Kathryn smiled. "Good. I'll speak to him about it." She   
stood up as Tom and Harry re-entered the room. "B'Elanna,   
Harry, you may go now. I'd like to speak to Tom alone."   
  
"Yes, Captain," they both said, and with one last glance at   
Tom, they left.  
  
"Tom, come and sit down. I came to see how you were   
actually. The Doctor is rather concerned about how quiet   
you've been."  
  
"There hasn't been much to say," Tom said quietly, sitting   
down on the couch.  
  
Kathryn sat back in the chair and regarded him thoughtfully.   
"I can only imagine how devastated you must feel."  
  
Tom stiffened. "I'll get over it. As you said, there are   
other things in life. I just have to find them."  
  
"Yes, that's true, but you've lost something very important   
to you. Flying was a part of you and I know it's going to be   
hard for you to readjust."  
  
Tom shook his head. "Don't worry about me, Captain. I'll   
be fine."  
  
"I know you will, but if you need to talk, I'm more than   
willing to listen. And I'm not the only one. The Commander   
has offered his services also."  
  
"Talking isn't going to change anything," Tom said, and there   
was a trace of bitterness in his voice. "Besides, I've   
already said it all. There's nothing else to say."   
  
And Kathryn had to leave it at that.  
  
******  
  
B'Elanna cursed as the console in front of her beeped once   
again. Slapping her hand down on it angrily, she struggled   
to control her temper. Taking a deep breath she felt herself   
calming down and even managed to say to Carey in a normal   
tone of voice, "You'd better do this. I can't seem to   
concentrate."  
  
As Joe Carey took over, she told him she was going to go and   
grab a late lunch and headed for the mess hall. When she   
entered, she saw that there was hardly any body in there, but   
Tom was sitting by himself at a table at the far end of the   
room.   
  
She'd been hoping that he would be. She'd only seen him   
twice in the past week and he'd barely spoken. She knew that   
Harry hadn't had much luck either. Tom was taking late meal   
breaks and skipping some meals all together. Picking up the   
first thing she could see, she dumped it on her tray and   
hurried over to him.  
  
"Hi," she said, slipping into the seat opposite him. "How   
are things?"  
  
"Fine," Tom answered. "How are things with you?" He quickly   
looked down at his tray again, as if the pudding-like   
concoction on it had suddenly become fascinating.  
  
"Good. Actually, you should congratulate me." At Tom's   
quizzical look, she explained. "Tuvok's sessions seem to be   
helping. I managed to calm myself in just a few seconds a   
couple of minutes ago."  
  
Tom looked back down at his tray again. "That's good."  
  
B'Elanna gave a small sigh. "Anything exciting happening   
with you?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Nothing in sickbay?"  
  
Tom shook his head. "No."  
  
B'Elanna sighed again... louder this time. She could feel   
the anger starting to surface and decided to count to ten, as   
Tuvok had taught her. They ate in silence for a while.  
  
"Have you seen Harry lately?" she asked suddenly. They were   
the only ones in the mess hall by now, except for Neelix, who   
was pottering around behind the counter.  
  
Tom didn't look up. "I saw him last night."  
  
"How is he?" She already knew that Harry was fine. She'd   
called in on him herself this morning. But she thought it   
might get Tom talking.  
  
"All right. He doesn't have any memories of being turned   
into photonic energy."  
  
She already knew that too. "The Doctor did a good job   
getting Chakotay, Tuvok and Harry back, didn't he?"  
  
Tom nodded. "Yes."  
  
"Who would have thought of Harry as Beowulf? I'm going to   
have to tease him about that."  
  
Tom didn't say anything to that and B'Elanna gritted her   
teeth and counted to ten again. You're not mad at him, she   
kept telling herself... you're worried. The friendly,   
cheerful, outgoing man she had come to know, was now quiet,   
withdrawn and completely anti-social. On top of the fact   
that her best friend in the Maquis - Seska - had turned out   
to be a Cardassian spy, betraying them to the Kazon, it was   
all too much.  
  
"Tom, how about coming to the holodeck with me tonight?   
Harry doesn't want to, after yesterday's fiasco with the   
photonic beings. I'd really like some company. I'll even   
let you pick the program."  
  
Tom shook his head. "No, thanks. I was going to have an   
early night."  
  
B'Elanna growled. "You're always having early nights. You   
never want to go any where or do any thing." She wondered   
why she cared so much. He's a friend and he needs help, she   
told herself.  
  
"I'm just a little tired."  
  
"That's what you always say. I don't believe you."  
  
Tom stood up abruptly. "I'd better get back to sickbay."  
  
B'Elanna grabbed his arm. "We haven't finished talking."  
  
Tom managed to break free. "Yes, we have."  
  
B'Elanna jumped up. "Stop running away."  
  
Tom turned around to glare at her. "I don't know what you're   
talking about. Did it ever occur to you that I don't want   
to be around every one feeling sorry for me? I can't stand   
all that pity."  
  
"The only pity around here is your self-pity. You're full   
of it."  
  
"Will you mind your own business, Torres?"   
  
"Don't make me hurt you, Paris." She grabbed hold of both of   
his arms this time and determined not to let go.  
  
Neelix, hearing the raised voices, hurried out from his   
galley. "Lieutenants," he said. "Whatever the problem is,   
I'm sure we can work it out."  
  
B'Elanna growled at him, and he took a step back.  
  
Tom struggled to get away, but this time she had a better   
grip. "Let me go."  
  
"No. You're not going any where."  
  
"I said... let me go," Tom yelled, struggling even harder.  
  
"Please, please," Neelix begged, trying to be heard over the   
top of both of them.   
  
It was absolute chaos, and into this entered the Captain and   
Tuvok, about to have a very late lunch.  
  
******  
  
Tuvok's eyebrow's rose and Kathryn put her hand over her   
eyes. "Not again," she muttered.  
  
"It appears Lieutenant Torres requires more sessions with   
me," Tuvok commented before hurrying forward to try to   
separate the two.  
  
"Enough," Janeway bellowed in her best command voice, and   
B'Elanna let go of Tom abruptly. Tom staggered backwards and   
Neelix steadied him.   
  
"May I ask what's happening here?" Kathryn's voice was   
frosty.  
  
B'Elanna gulped and opened her mouth to confess; only to have   
Tom beat her to it.  
  
"I'm sorry, Captain. Things got a little out of hand. It   
was all my fault."  
  
"No, it wasn't," B'Elanna hastily said. "I lost my temper   
again."   
  
"Yes, but I made her, Captain, so it *is* my fault."  
  
As B'Elanna was about to argue, Janeway held up her hand. "I   
don't care whose fault it is. I just want to know why it   
happened. What's going on *this* time?"  
  
Tom looked at B'Elanna and B'Elanna looked back at Tom. They   
both hesitated. B'Elanna certainly didn't want to admit that   
she'd lost her temper because Tom wouldn't go to the holodeck   
with her - again. She didn't think the Captain would be   
particularly amused or as understanding as the last time.  
  
Tom didn't want to admit that he was feeling sorry for   
himself and pushing his friends away.  
  
"Oh, let *me* tell you, Captain," Neelix offered.   
"Lieutenant Torres wouldn't let Tom leave here because she   
was trying to get him to go out with her, but he doesn't want   
to go out in case everyone feels sorry for him, and she says   
he's full of self-pity and he wants her to mind her own   
business and she wants to hurt him... I think... and oh... I   
nearly forgot... she thinks he keeps running away."   
  
He took a deep breath, but before any one could say anything,   
he rushed on. "Lieutenant Torres wouldn't let Tom go, no   
matter how much he struggled. I was about to suggest that   
he kick her in the shins or trip her up or something, but I   
wasn't sure if I should. Some species frown upon a gentlemen   
physically fighting with a lady, but I think under these   
circumstances it would have been acceptable. After all, she   
is so much stronger than he is and..."  
  
"Thank you Neelix," Janeway finally managed to say. She   
turned to Tuvok, who was watching Neelix as if he were the   
most unusual thing he'd ever seen and she had to struggle not   
to laugh.   
  
"Oh, my pleasure, Captain. I'm just glad that I could be of   
assistance." Neelix beamed around at every one. B'Elanna   
glared at the Talaxian, while Tom studied his shoes.  
  
Kathryn turned back to Neelix again. "I'm sure we've kept   
you from your duties long enough."  
  
"Why no, Captain," he interrupted. "This is much more   
interesting."  
  
"I'm sure it is, but you must be very busy." She wondered if   
the Talaxian could take a hint.  
  
"Not at the moment, Captain. I have the next few hours to   
myself until I have to start preparing the dinner. I'd be   
more than happy to stay here and help in any way that I can."  
  
"Thank you, but that's not necessary."  
  
"Oh, but I don't mind."  
  
She decided she would have to be straightforward. "I do. I   
would like to speak to the two Lieutenants in private."  
  
"Oh! Of course, Captain. You should have said. Come along   
Mr. Vulcan. We have to go now."  
  
Tuvok looked at him in amazement and then turned to her.   
"Do you require me to leave, Captain?"  
  
Kathryn shook her head. "No. I'd like you to stay, thank   
you, Tuvok."  
  
"Oh! I understand," Neelix bobbed his head up and down. "In   
case Ms. Torres becomes uncontrollable, you will need Mr.   
Vulcan's superior strength to contain..."  
  
"Goodbye, Neelix." Kathryn glared at him.  
  
"Um, goodbye." Neelix bustled from the room and they all   
breathed a sigh of relief - even Tuvok.  
  
Kathryn turned back to Tom and B'Elanna and folded her arms.   
"Although Neelix's account of what happened was rather   
amusing, I'm no longer amused. I will not have my crew   
behaving in this manner. It was just a bit of luck that   
there was no one else in here to witness this little   
spectacle."  
  
"I'm sorry, Captain," B'Elanna said miserably.  
  
"I'm sure you are, but that doesn't really change anything.   
This is becoming a serious problem. Tuvok, do you think that   
you can help Ms. Torres to achieve some self-restraint?"  
  
"Yes, Captain, I do. But it will take time."  
  
"Very well. I want you to increase your sessions with her,   
to as frequently as you deem appropriate... daily if   
necessary." B'Elanna looked as if she were about to protest.   
"Yes, Lieutenant? You have something to say?"  
  
"No, Captain."  
  
"Good." She turned to Tom, who was still studying his shoes.   
"Mr. Paris. I would like you to speak to Commander Chakotay.   
I believe you need some counseling to help you readjust."  
  
Tom looked up at her in surprise. "That's not necessary,   
Captain."  
  
"I think it is."  
  
"I'm fine," he protested. "Just because I don't want to go   
out partying every night."  
  
"It's a lot more than that and you know it, Tom."  
  
"If Torres would just quit bugging me, I'd be all right."  
  
"You are going to speak to Commander Chakotay, that's an   
order, Lieutenant."  
  
"Yes, Ma'am."  
  
"Now both of you get back to work and I never want to hear   
of anything like this happening again. Do I make myself   
clear?"   
  
"Yes, Captain," they both said at once, marching towards   
the door.   
  
As they stepped out into the corridor she heard Tom hiss.   
"This is all your fault, Torres."  
  
"My fault?" B'Elanna hissed back. "If you weren't so   
stubborn..."  
  
"And if you weren't so interfering."  
  
"Interfering?" B'Elanna's voice rose to full volume. "I'm   
trying to help you, you pig-headed pig."  
  
Janeway rolled her eyes and looked towards Tuvok, who merely   
raised one eyebrow.  
  
"Some help. And who are you calling a pig, Pinocchio?"  
  
"P'tahk! What's a Pinocchio?"  
  
"It's a creature that sticks its nose where it's not wanted   
and each time its nose grows." Janeway raised her eyebrow,   
herself. She hadn't heard that particular story told in   
quite that way before. "It's a wonder your nose hasn't made   
its way back to engineering by now."  
  
A loud thump was heard after that, followed by a yelp.  
  
Kathryn shook her head. "I did not hear that, Tuvok. Please   
tell me, I didn't hear it."  
  
More thumps could be heard, then a loud groan. "You didn't   
hear that either, Captain," Tuvok said dryly.   
  
As the bangs and thumps grew louder, Kathryn hurried to the   
door. "I'm throwing them both in the brig this time, Tuvok.   
I mean it."  
  
"Indeed!"  
  
  
End Part Six 


	7. Chapter Seven

Comparisons - Part Seven  
By T'Pam  
  
  
For disclaimer, codes and rating, please see part 1.  
  
  
~^~  
  
B'Elanna paced up and down in the tiny cell, wondering what   
the hell was the matter with her. Nobody stirred her up the   
way Tom Paris did. He was stubborn, pigheaded, irritating,   
attractive... she broke off at the thought. Was she   
attracted to him? He was certainly good looking and kind and   
generous and brave and... she stopped herself. He was a   
friend... nothing more. She cared about him as a friend   
would. She cringed as she thought about how angry the   
Captain had been with them both. Her ears still burned.  
  
Of course, she hadn't helped matters with her little display   
as they'd arrived at the brig. But that had been Paris's   
fault as well. She had walked through the corridors behind   
him, and in front of the Captain and Tuvok with as much   
dignity as she could muster. She thought she'd done a pretty   
good job too, until they were standing outside the cells.  
  
"You can both spend the night in here to cool off," Janeway   
had said angrily.  
  
"I don't think these cells are big enough, Captain," Tom had   
answered. "You'll never fit both Torres and her nose in one   
of them."  
  
She'd screamed angrily and pounced on him, only to find   
herself propelled into one of the cells and Tuvok almost   
glaring at her.  
  
The Captain had been furious and told them that they could   
both stay in the brig for the rest of the journey home as far   
as she was concerned.  
  
"Would you mind pacing a little quieter? You're giving me a   
headache," Tom complained. She couldn't see him, he was in   
the cell next to hers, but they could certainly hear each   
other. She promptly started stomping around the cell as   
loudly as she could. This didn't last for very long,   
however, as Tom made no comment.  
  
She looked across to the guard. It was Ayala, a friend of   
hers from the Maquis. "Do you know how long we're going to   
be kept in here?"  
  
"I'm sorry, B'Elanna... I don't. And I'm not supposed to   
talk to you."  
  
"I won't tell anyone."  
  
"Sorry. I'm just following orders."  
  
"Come on, Ayala. We're friends."  
  
"Sorry, B'Elanna. I don't want to get into trouble."  
  
A snort came from the other cell. "She's pretty good at   
getting friends into trouble."  
  
"What are you saying, Paris? That this is *my* fault?   
You're the one with the big mouth. It's almost as big as   
your head. And if you don't shut it, I'm going to put my   
fist in it."  
  
Tom chuckled. "I think the wall might stop that."  
  
B'Elanna kicked the wall in frustration and Ayala hurried   
over. "Come on, B'Elanna. Calm down. He's just trying to   
stir you up."  
  
"And I'm doing a pretty good job of it, if I do say so   
myself."  
  
"Paris, will you shut up?" Ayala said in exasperation, as   
B'Elanna started swearing in Klingon. She hurled every   
insult she could think of at him, before sinking down on the   
bunk at the far side of the cell.  
  
All was quiet for a few moments, and Ayala, with a look of   
relief, headed back to his station.  
  
Tom's voice ruined the peace. "Same to you, Torres, with   
bells on."  
  
******  
  
"Do you see what I'm trying to cope with here? They're like   
two little kids." Janeway threw her hands up in frustration   
as Chakotay turned off the security monitor from the brig.  
  
"Tuvok, you'd better get down there before Torres *does*   
manage to put a hole through the wall," she said with a sigh.  
  
"Yes, Captain. Do I have your permission to nerve pinch her   
if necessary?"  
  
"You have my permission to shoot her, if necessary. That   
goes for Tom too."  
  
Tuvok raised his eyebrow a little before speeding away.   
Chakotay couldn't hide his amusement.  
  
"It's not funny, Commander."  
  
"I agree. It's a very serious situation," he answered,   
struggling to keep a straight face.  
  
"Yes, it is. What if the rest of the crew decided to act   
like that?"  
  
"I don't think that's very likely."  
  
"Perhaps not. Quite frankly, Commander, I'm out of my depth   
here. I don't know what to do with them."  
  
"Well, Lieutenant Tuvok's sessions with B'Elanna should   
help."  
  
"Yes, but that's in the long term. What do I do with her in   
the meantime?"  
  
"Perhaps if we kept them apart? Banned them from going near   
each other?"  
  
"This is a small ship. But I suppose it might be possible   
until B'Elanna can control herself a little more. The sad   
part of it is that she's been trying to help him. Tom's been   
so quiet lately."  
  
"Well, he's certainly not quiet now."  
  
"No. Perhaps this has done some good after all. I still   
would like him to come to you for counseling. He needs to   
accept his loss and move on."  
  
Chakotay nodded. "I agree. He's obviously very angry with   
B'Elanna for not leaving him alone and this is his way of   
dealing with it. He certainly knows how to push her   
buttons."  
  
"Oh, he's very good at that. The first time I met him, he   
pushed a few of mine."   
  
She quickly filled him in and Chakotay couldn't help   
laughing. "Talk about making a great first impression."  
  
Janeway laughed as well. "Despite all that, I've really come   
to like him and care about him. I hate to see him   
withdrawing into himself. I hope you can help him."  
  
"I'll try, Captain."  
  
"Good. Now, shall we turn the security monitor back on and   
see if Tuvok has actually had to shoot either of them?"  
  
Chakotay chuckled and reached across to turn it on. All was   
quiet. Both Tom and B'Elanna were sitting on their bunks.   
They watched in silence as Tuvok prepared to leave.  
  
"Please contact me, Mr. Ayala, if there is any more trouble."   
  
"Yes, Lieutenant."  
  
As soon as Tuvok had gone, Tom laid down, but B'Elanna jumped   
up and hurried across to the barrier of her cell. "I'm sorry   
if I got you in trouble, Ayala."  
  
He shrugged carelessly, but didn't answer.  
  
She sighed and sat down again.  
  
As the silence lengthened, Janeway sighed in relief.   
"Hopefully, that's the end of it now." She turned off the   
monitor.  
  
Chakotay smiled. "It should be."  
  
******  
  
There was silence in the brig for quite some time. Tom had a   
pounding headache and he was starting to feel very guilty   
about baiting B'Elanna. She was his friend and was only   
interfering because she cared.  
  
"B'Elanna?" he called out tentatively. "I'm sorry too. I   
shouldn't have goaded you like that. I know you were just   
trying to help."  
  
"Yes, I was." B'Elanna said gruffly. "But I shouldn't lose   
my temper all the time. I'm sorry I attacked you. I didn't   
hurt you did I?"  
  
Tom gave a small laugh. "A few bruises here and there, but   
I'll live."  
  
"Oh, Tom! I'm so sorry."  
  
"Forget it. I deserved them."  
  
"No, you didn't."  
  
"Yeah. I did."  
  
B'Elanna jumped back off her bunk again and started pacing.   
"I feel terrible. I'm a lousy friend."  
  
"No, you're not. You're a great friend. The best."  
  
B'Elanna snorted, continuing to pace.  
  
"Um. B'Elanna? Do you think you could stop pacing? It   
really *is* giving me a headache."  
  
B'Elanna sighed, but Tom heard her sit back down on her bunk.   
He sighed with relief. Shutting his eyes he tried to go to   
sleep.  
  
"Tom?"  
  
He decided to ignore her.  
  
"Hey, Paris?" She was louder this time.  
  
Tom groaned quietly and opened one eye. "What? I'm trying   
to go to sleep here."  
  
"Sleep? It's the middle of the afternoon."  
  
"Yeah, well I'm tired." He opened both eyes and stared at   
the ceiling.  
  
"You're always saying that."  
  
"Well, this time I really am."  
  
"Yeah, right, Paris. If you don't want to talk to me, just   
say so."  
  
"Okay. I don't want to talk to you."  
  
"Very funny." She lapsed into silence, and Tom - with   
another sigh of relief - shut his eyes again. If he stayed   
still, with his eyes shut, the headache wasn't so bad.  
  
"I hate being locked up in here," B'Elanna suddenly grumbled,   
making Tom's eyes open immediately. "How long do you think   
she'll keep us here?"   
  
Tom gave in, and slowly sat up. "Hell knows. It was   
supposed to be overnight, but now it could be longer."  
  
"How much longer?"  
  
Tom sighed. "I don't know." His head continued to pound.  
  
"Well, you must have some idea. What's the usual procedure   
in a case like this?"   
  
"I don't know," he repeated, starting to become annoyed.   
"I've never actually had a fight with a fellow officer   
before."  
  
"Well, you didn't have a fight this time. You just let me   
attack you."  
  
"What was I supposed to do?" He was becoming seriously   
annoyed now.   
  
"I don't know. Fight back. The least you could have done   
was try to stop me."  
  
Tom shook his head in anger, and the movement made his head   
spin. "I'm not in the habit of fighting girls, Torres,   
although in your case, I could make an exception."  
  
B'Elanna hooted. "What are you getting so riled up about?   
Did I embarrass you?"  
  
Tom tried to think of some smart rejoinder, but his head was   
pounding too hard. "Why don't you shut up?" was all he could   
manage.  
  
"Don't tell me to shut up," B'Elanna yelled.  
  
"Well someone sure as hell should," he yelled back.  
  
They started hurling insults at each other and Ayala rushed   
over. "Cut it out, you two."  
  
They continued to yell back and forth taking no notice of   
him. Ayala was yelling at them both too by now.  
  
"When I get out of here, I'm going to..."  
  
"Who says you're going to get out of there?" The voice was   
quiet, but deadly. It had the desired effect. B'Elanna shut   
up in mid sentence.   
  
Chakotay and Tuvok stood in front of them. "I didn't want to   
believe just how childishly you two were behaving," Chakotay   
continued. "Do you want to spend the rest of our journey   
home, here in the brig? Because I'm telling you, if you keep   
this up, you will be."  
  
Chakotay continued to remonstrate with them, but Tom barely   
heard him. Now that the adrenaline rush from arguing with   
B'Elanna was over, his head was hammering once again. He   
wondered whether he should say something about it. Ask if he   
could go to sickbay. His eyes watered as the pain increased.  
  
He had just decided to, when he heard B'Elanna say, "I think   
I need to go to sickbay. I've got a toothache." Damn   
Torres, anyway!  
  
"Nice try, but it won't work," Chakotay said with a smile.   
"You're both staying here for the next two days. Whether   
you're let out after that, depends on you."  
  
"But, my tooth really *does* hurt."  
  
"Then it looks like you'll be suffering."  
  
"Chakotay! Prisoners are supposed to be given proper medical   
attention," B'Elanna protested.   
  
"For proper medical conditions; they are."  
  
Tom seethed with anger. He couldn't possibly tell the   
Commander that he had a fairly severe headache, now. He'd   
never believe him... thanks to Torres.  
  
Chakotay left, but Tuvok took over Ayala's station.  
  
"Look's like Tuvok's going to keep us under control,"   
B'Elanna commented. Her voice was amused.  
  
But Tom wasn't. "Why don't you just shut up, Torres? Now,   
because of you, I'm stuck with this headache."  
  
"Lieutenant Paris, I will only say this once," Tuvok said   
from his station. "There will be no discussions of any   
kind, between yourself and Lieutenant Torres. I do not   
expect to have to repeat myself."  
  
Tom sighed and sat down heavily on the bunk.  
  
******  
  
"Tuvok intends to keep an eye on them himself," Chakotay told   
Janeway. "I'm not sure if I got through to them or not.   
B'Elanna certainly looked contrite enough. Then she ruined it   
all by pretending to have to go to sickbay with a toothache."   
He looked worried.  
  
"What is it, Commander?"  
  
"I'm just wondering if perhaps we're being a little hard on   
Tom. After all, B'Elanna was the one fighting him. He   
wasn't fighting her, just trying to defend himself. I know   
he stirred her up, but she should be able to handle a little   
teasing. He's very upset."  
  
"I can't say I'm surprised. He's had an exemplatory record   
up until this, and we both know he has emotional problems at   
the moment."  
  
Chakotay nodded. "At one stage, while I was reading them the   
riot act, I thought he was going to cry. He had tears in his   
eyes, and was very pale and shaky. He didn't say a word   
either."  
  
"Oh, dear. I shouldn't have thrown him in the brig. He's   
still trying to deal with not being able to fly. I think we   
should let him out in the morning."  
  
"I agree. What about B'Elanna?"  
  
Janeway sighed. "We'll let her out too. She's needed down   
in engineering."   
  
"Should we turn on the monitor and check to see if they're   
finally behaving?"  
  
Kathryn shook her head. "I'd rather not know. Lieutenant   
Tuvok will let me know if there are any more problems I'm   
sure."  
  
"I don't think there will be. If that's all, Captain, I'll   
get back to the bridge."  
  
"Thank you, Commander."  
  
Kathryn continued to read her reports after he'd left, but   
she found it more and more difficult to concentrate. She   
couldn't stop worrying about Tom. She had a soft spot for   
him and freely admitted it. She wondered if she should go   
down to the brig and check on him. Make sure he was all   
right.   
  
She could go down later this evening, on the pretext that she   
was telling them personally that she was ignoring their   
behavior in the brig, and that they would be let out in the   
morning. That way she could see Tom for herself. Let him   
know that she wasn't that mad at him. That would go a long   
way to reassure him, if he was as upset as Chakotay thought   
he was.  
  
She sat up abruptly. Why was she so worried about Tom? He'd   
had a bad blow, she knew. His whole life would now be   
changed. But in a way, hadn't they all? She supposed it was   
because flying meant so much to him. He was so gifted and   
now, because of her, he'd lost that gift.   
  
She felt guilty about it. If he hadn't come back for her on   
the crumbling staircase, his hands might not have been so   
badly damaged. She knew that the damage had been done when   
the helm had exploded, and then the Caretaker had beamed Tom   
down to the Ocampas, instead of leaving him in sickbay so   
that the EMH could treat him. She couldn't help wondering   
just how much more damage he'd done on the staircase though.  
  
She shook her head. Thoughts like this were counter   
productive. It wouldn't change what had happened. She also   
knew that the reason that she felt so close to Tom was   
because of his father. Over the years, Tom's father had told   
her so much about him that although she'd only really known   
Tom these past few months, she felt like she'd known him   
since he was a small boy.   
  
Owen Paris had been like a second father to her. He had   
guided her and supported her all through her Starfleet career   
and she owed it to him to make sure that Tom was all right.   
Since accepting the painful truth that he would never be able   
to fly again, Tom had become withdrawn, and the fight with   
B'Elanna and subsequent punishment could be more than he   
could handle.  
  
The thought of him sitting in the brig, so upset, was more   
than she could bear and she determined that she *would* go   
down there before her evening meal. This firmly decided; she   
found she was able to concentrate on the reports in front of   
her.  
  
******  
  
"Did it not occur to any one that Mr. Paris may have been   
injured? It appears that Ms. Torres did more than just   
bruise him. He is concussed. I cannot believe that you have   
two crewmembers fighting to the death..."  
  
"It was hardly to the death, Doctor," Janeway interrupted.  
  
"Be that as it may, they were fighting... inflicting bodily   
harm on one another..."  
  
"Well they weren't really fighting," she interrupted again.   
"Tom was just trying to get B'Elanna off of him. But I   
realize now that B'Elanna was banging Tom's head against the   
wall. He didn't say anything about being hurt."  
  
The Doctor sniffed his disapproval. "I realize that you are   
not medically trained, Captain, but surely it has not escaped   
your notice that Ms. Torres is Klingon and..."  
  
"Half," Janeway interjected. "She's only half Klingon."  
  
"Oh, well that makes all the difference," the EMH said   
sarcastically. "If you will allow me to finish what I want   
to say? She is stronger than most of the crew, and especially   
a human with limited use of his hands. I find it hard to   
believe that you just threw them both in the brig without   
having him examined first."  
  
"You're right, Doctor," Kathryn agreed. "I'm afraid that I   
just didn't think of it at the time. I was mad at the both   
of them," she pulled herself up short. She didn't have to   
explain herself to this computer program. Although it was   
becoming more and more difficult to think of him in those   
terms. As she watched him bustling around Tom, it occurred   
to her that the EMH was becoming as real to her as any other   
member of the crew.   
  
She was glad that all Tom had was a concussion; he'd looked   
so deathly ill when she'd had him beamed directly to sickbay.   
  
When she'd entered the brig, Tom had seemed to be sleeping   
peacefully, and she'd almost left without speaking to him. It   
was only because Tuvok had informed her that he'd been asleep   
for nearly three hours that she'd gone over to him.  
  
She was standing looking into his cell, thinking how tired he   
must be, when B'Elanna commented that he slept like the dead.   
She'd been unable to waken him, she'd said, sounding a   
little annoyed, and Kathryn had taken a closer look. Tom   
looked awfully pale, so she'd asked Tuvok to lower the force   
field.  
  
She'd been shocked to discover that Tom was not asleep as he   
appeared, but unconscious, and had had them both beamed to   
sickbay immediately. The Doctor had begun treatment quickly   
and efficiently, but not without his usual caustic comments.  
  
"Is he going to be all right now?" she asked.  
  
"Naturally. My medical expertise has conquered once again.   
However, I can only hope that you have learned from this   
experience, Captain, and that in future any crewmembers under   
these circumstances will be examined before incarcerated."   
  
"I can assure you, these *circumstances* will not be   
repeated. I will not have crewmembers attacking each other."  
  
The EMH snorted a little as if he found that idea totally   
unbelievable and then continued as if she hadn't spoken. "If   
you are in too much of a hurry to have them thrown behind   
bars to come to sickbay, then I suggest notifying me and   
since I am stuck in this," he waved his arms around the room,   
"hell-hole, I will send someone to the brig. Kes is more   
than capable of carrying out a simple examination already, and   
even Mr. Paris should be able to check for injuries.   
Although, that is of course if he is not one of the   
combatants."  
  
Kathryn sighed rather loudly, but merely said, "Thank you,   
Doctor. When Tom wakes up, send him back to his quarters."  
  
"Oh? You don't want him back in the brig?"  
  
"No. I think he's been punished enough. He didn't really do   
anything except not know when to keep quiet."  
  
"Ah! I am gratified that you have discovered this apparent   
character flaw. I myself find him quite trying at times.   
Considering how patient and understanding I have learnt to   
be, I believe that this fact is telling in itself. If I find   
that he tests my patience, I can only imagine what Ms. Torres   
- who is renown for her lack of patience - has to..."  
  
On that note Kathryn quickly left the sickbay, without   
another word.  
  
She heard the Doctor's - "Well, really! People can be so   
rude!" - as the doors closed behind her.  
  
******  
  
"It seems to me that everything's turned out rather well,"   
Chakotay remarked as the doors to the ready room closed   
behind Tuvok.  
  
"Yes, it would appear so," Kathryn agreed. "Although I'd   
rather not have had to deal with a guilt stricken Vulcan.   
Putting himself on report for dereliction of duty was a bit   
much. And the argument as to why it was a logical step,   
since he had heard Tom say that he had a headache and ignored   
it, almost had me agreeing with him."  
  
Chakotay chuckled. "Vulcans can be very persuasive with   
their logic. If it comes to that, he probably should have   
reported me too. After all, I knew there was something   
wrong. If I'd asked Tom if he was all right instead of   
assuming he was upset, he probably would have told me."  
  
"Yes, and if I had done what the Doctor suggested, and had   
him checked over before throwing them in the brig...   
Everything's 'if only', Chakotay. At least he's all right   
now."  
  
"Yes, he is. I had a long session with him last night and he   
seems much more cheerful today. He let out his anger at fate   
and his grief, and I think now he's ready to move on. He'll   
need a few more sessions with me yet, but he's definitely   
better than he was."   
  
"I'm glad. I thought he seemed a little more like his old   
self this morning."  
  
Chakotay laughed. "Spirits help us when he does get back to   
'normal'. I get the impression he can be a little   
irrepressible at times."  
  
Kathryn bobbed her head up and down in agreement. "But if   
that's all we have to worry about, I'll be happy."  
  
"B'Elanna seems determined to try her best with Tuvok too.   
She was horrified at what she had done to Tom and genuinely   
never wants anything like that to happen again."  
  
"Well that makes two of us. I know she cares about him, but   
he seems to bring out the Klingon in her."  
  
"I know. I think she cares about him a little too much."  
  
"Oh? You think it's more than just friendship?"  
  
Chakotay nodded. "I've known her for a while now and yes,   
she's definitely attracted to him. She wouldn't admit that   
though, not even to herself."  
  
"You sound a little disapproving. Don't you like Tom?"  
  
"Of course I do. I think everybody does. It's not that.   
It's just not a good idea to become romantically involved on   
a starship."  
  
"Under normal circumstances, I'd agree with you, but we could   
be out here a long time. People are bound to start pairing   
off. It's only natural."  
  
"I suppose you're right. But if something happens and they   
break up, they can't exactly be reassigned. They're stuck on   
the ship together."  
  
"I think that would be taken into consideration before any   
serious relationships were formed. Aren't you jumping the   
gun a little, Commander? All you have is a suspicion that   
B'Elanna may be attracted to Tom. You don't know if he   
returns these feelings, and I don't think he's even thought   
of her in that way, or even if they would ever do anything   
about it. They may prefer to remain friends."  
  
"I suppose so."  
  
"I'm still hoping that we can find a way home before any of   
this becomes an issue."  
  
Chakotay smiled. "Me too."  
  
*******  
  
Over the next few weeks Tom settled into his new life and   
even admitted to really enjoying working in sickbay. He   
still missed flying and sometimes that depressed him, but on   
the whole he was amazingly cheerful. He helped Kes in the   
airponics bay, when he wasn't in sickbay, and had even devised   
- with Chakotay's help - some training programs, for the   
pilots.  
  
Chakotay had talked him into that... he hadn't wanted to   
remind himself of what he could no longer do. But the   
Commander had been very insistent, saying that Tom had so   
much experience that would really benefit the other pilots,   
that he'd finally agreed.   
  
It'd been painful to watch Chakotay testing and enhancing his   
program, asking his opinion on how to ensure that the pilots   
got a proper workout. He had wanted to take over the   
controls many times himself, but knew that his fingers   
wouldn't move quickly enough to allow him to complete the   
complex maneuvers.  
  
That first time had been difficult; the pain had been a tight   
knot in his throat, and Tom had found it hard to even answer   
the Commander's questions. Chakotay had been his usual   
understanding self and somehow Tom had got through it.   
  
Each time had been a little easier than the time before and   
now Tom, who realized that it would probably always hurt a   
little to see someone else at the helm controls, was able to   
contribute to the training programs with enthusiasm. The   
other pilots were even coming to him for advice, which he was   
more than happy to give.  
  
They had been out in the Delta Quadrant for seven months now,   
and although the crew were still hopeful of finding a   
wormhole or the other caretaker, they no longer believed that   
they would be home in the foreseeable future. They had all   
settled into their respective roles on Voyager, and other than   
a slight suspiciousness that still lingered between the   
Maquis and Starfleet, the ship was running smoothly.  
  
The main problem that they seemed to have was with the Kazon.   
Every few weeks they seemed to run into a different sect of   
them and none of them were friendly. Voyager's superior   
weapons and shields protected them to a certain extent, but   
they still suffered damage, and they all realized that if   
ever the different sects united they would be in real   
trouble.  
  
Luckily, they had not seen the Vidiians since their first   
encounter with them, when they had stolen Neelix's lungs.   
The Vidiians had obviously taken Janeway's warning seriously.   
Unfortunately, they had also not seen any planets that had   
any suitable materials that they could use. Their shortages   
were becoming serious and the Captain had the crew searching   
each sector that they entered, hoping for a planet that could   
help them.  
  
******  
  
Finally, they reached a section of space that the Kazon   
didn't seem to have any claim to and contained three separate   
planets that were rich in the materials that Voyager needed.   
Janeway beamed down an away team to investigate the first   
planet, which showed promise of having materials that were   
needed urgently in engineering, while Voyager continued on to   
the other two planets, rich in food supplies.  
  
She told the away team that Voyager would be back in three   
days to pick them up. B'Elanna was in charge of the team and   
was as excited as anybody had ever seen her. On the away   
team with her were two ensigns from engineering - Janine   
Palmer and Brian Mitchell, a security officer - Peter Durst,   
and Tom in his role of field medic.   
  
The Captain wasn't expecting any trouble, but since Voyager   
would be out of communications range, she didn't want to take   
any chances. Somebody with medical knowledge would come in   
handy, in case someone had an accident and got hurt. She   
told herself sternly that her decision had nothing to do with   
the fact that Tom had been dying to get off the ship.  
  
The away team were beamed down, next to the entrance of a   
cave, and B'Elanna went straight to work. While Lieutenant   
Durst and Tom scanned the cave to ensure that there wasn't   
any safety hazards there, she and the other engineers set up   
their equipment. The cave was huge, dark and damp, but there   
were no security problems that they could find.  
  
"I'm getting all sorts of readings from these walls,"   
B'Elanna announced a short time later. "I think we've hit   
the jackpot." They worked quickly and efficiently for some   
time before Tom, who wasn't able to help much, told B'Elanna   
he was going to go outside to see if there was any food they   
could have for dinner instead of their ration packs.  
  
"Good idea," she said. "Durst, go with him. I don't know   
about the rest of you, but I don't fancy sleeping in here   
tonight. It's too creepy or something. Maybe we could camp   
out under the stars? The nights are supposed to be quite   
mild here."  
  
Everyone readily agreed with the suggestion - obviously the   
cave was getting to them all - so Tom picked up their   
backpacks and went outside to set up the camp.  
  
"What about here, Tom?" Durst indicated a clearing not far   
from the cave entrance. "This should do fine."  
  
Tom nodded and dropped the backpacks. "I don't know about   
you, Pete, but I seriously do not want to eat those field   
rations. Let's see if there's any native fruits and   
vegetables we can eat, before setting up camp. I think it'll   
be dark soon."  
  
"Okay, Tom. My tricorder says there could be something   
promising in this direction."  
  
They had only just set off, when Tom stopped abruptly. "What   
was that?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm not sure. I thought I heard something." Tom turned   
around and stared at the cave entrance.  
  
"It was probably B'Elanna or one of the others." Durst   
pointed his tricorder at the cave and paled visibly.   
"There's five lifesigns in there."  
  
"Come on," Tom took off at a run, pulling his phaser from his   
belt as he ran. As they reached the entrance, they entered   
slowly and carefully. There was no sign of the other away   
team members.   
  
"Where the hell could they have gone?" Durst asked in   
disbelief as he scanned the cave once again. "There's no   
other way in or out of here that I can find."  
  
"Since B'Elanna and the others aren't here, there must be   
something hidden somewhere," Tom answered. The sudden sound   
of a phaser shot behind him had him spinning around in time   
to see Durst fall to the ground. Movement from the corner of   
his eye made him realize that someone was pointing a weapon   
at him too.   
  
Before he could react, blackness engulfed him.  
  
  
End Part Seven 


	8. Chapter Eight

Comparisons - Part Eight   
By T'Pam  
  
For disclaimer, codes and rating, please see part 1.  
  
~^~  
  
Tom could hear the whirring sound of a medical tricorder, as   
he struggled back to awareness. For a moment he thought he   
was safely back in sickbay until, attempting to sit up, he   
discovered he was strapped down.  
  
"Lie still," a voice told him, and he managed to focus on a   
figure standing beside him, waving the tricorder over his   
body. "This one will be no good for the tunnels, his hands   
are damaged. They'll soon lose patience with him down there.   
He might as well stay here for organ processing."  
  
Tom felt panic rising up within him as he recognized his   
captors. They were Vidiian. All they were interested in was   
harvesting body parts for their own disease-ridden bodies.   
He looked frantically around the room, but there was no sign   
of the other away team members.  
  
Another Vidiian came over and peered at the tricorder   
readings and then at Tom. "Hmmn!" she said, running her hand   
down one side of his face. Tom shuddered and turned his head   
away. "This one will make an excellent source of raw   
materials. All of his organs are in prime condition. And   
his skin is so soft and smooth. We'll be able to use it for   
many grafts."  
  
Tom swallowed the bile rising in his throat. "Where are the   
others?" he managed to ask.  
  
"All but one have been sent to the tunnels. When they can no   
longer work, they will be brought back here for organ   
processing. The other is in the laboratory next door."  
  
Oh god!!! Had they already started organ processing on one of   
the others? "You cold-hearted leeches. Murdering swine."   
Tom struggled against his bindings, to no avail. "What is   
this? Some sort of processing plant? You go out and catch   
someone, kill them and strip them for their body parts? What   
sort of monsters are you anyway?"  
  
"It is unfortunate, but necessary," the first Vidiian   
answered. "We are not monsters... just desperate. If you   
had experienced the devastation that this disease has caused,   
you'd be desperate too."  
  
"I'd never be desperate enough to go out and slaughter people   
for their organs. You're vile and disgusting."  
  
"Our whole civilization is on the brink of being destroyed."   
The Vidiian bending over him straightened up. "We will do   
whatever is necessary to ensure that we survive."  
  
"Well, from where I'm lying, you don't deserve to survive,"   
Tom muttered.  
  
"You naturally will never understand," she answered, turning   
away from him. She handed the tricorder to the other   
Vidiian. "Take these readings into Sulan. Let him have a   
look at them. This one is fully human, so I don't think he   
is of any use in the experiments. Sulan was only interested   
in the other one because of her other half... the Klingon.   
Let him decide however."  
  
B'Elanna! It must be B'Elanna they were talking about.   
"What have you done with her?" Tom rasped out.  
  
She turned back to look at him. "Doctor Sulan is one of our   
leading scientists. He has devoted his life to finding a   
cure for the Phage. The Klingon female has some interesting   
readings. He intends to separate her genetic material and   
then work with her. She could be very important."  
  
Tom shook his head in disgust. "You make me sick."  
  
She stepped back to his bed and once again stroked his cheek.   
"You are very good looking. I'm sure you've been told that   
before. If you behave yourself, I might let you live a   
little longer."  
  
Tom clenched his teeth. "Just get it over with," he   
answered, wishing his mouth wasn't so dry. All he really   
wanted to do was spit in her face.  
  
"We'll see," she said with a smile. "I like you. If Sulan   
doesn't want you, I might fix your hands and send you down to   
the tunnels after all. They need all the manpower they can   
get. That way I can always send for you whenever I want to.   
It would be a pity to kill you quite so soon."  
  
"Gee, thanks. You're all heart," Tom said sarcastically. He   
wondered what she meant about fixing his hands. They were as   
fixed as they ever would be.  
  
The other Vidiian returned. "Sulan says he doesn't need him.   
You can do whatever you want with him."  
  
"Really? That's wonderful news. Isn't it, my handsome one?"   
  
Tom shuddered. He wasn't sure what was going to happen, but   
he *was* sure it wasn't going to be pleasant.  
  
******  
  
B'Elanna slowly sat up. She felt weak and groggy, and it took   
a few seconds for her eyes to adjust. Where was she? And   
what the hell was going on? Looking around the room, she   
realized she was in a medical facility of some sort and on a   
bed on the other side of the room was Tom Paris.  
  
"Tom!" she cried, trying to go over to him. She really felt   
too weak to move. He didn't stir.  
  
"He's still unconscious." B'Elanna turned around sharply at   
the voice. Her heart jumped into her throat as she saw the   
person walking towards her was a Vidiian.  
  
"What's going on here?" she demanded. Her voice was even   
weaker than she'd expected. "What have you done to us?"  
  
"You will both be fine," the Vidiian woman answered. "You   
have both had surgery." She seemed to stumble over the last   
word.  
  
B'Elanna felt fear wash over her. "S-S-Surgery?" she   
stammered. She remembered what they had done to Neelix.   
"W-W-What kind of surgery?" She couldn't believe how   
frightened she was. Her heart was hammering so loudly that   
she wondered if the Vidiian woman could hear it.  
  
"We have extracted all of your Klingon DNA. It will be quite   
useful to us in finding a cure for the phage. You are now   
fully human."  
  
"What?" B'Elanna thought she would be sick. "That's not   
possible." Her hands went immediately to her forehead. It   
was smooth, just as she'd always secretly wished it to be.  
  
"We have the technology to make it possible. It was quite a   
simple procedure. You will now be sent down to the tunnels   
to work. You seem quite weak. I'm sure I will see you   
again, quite soon."  
  
As B'Elanna was led away by two guards, she looked back at   
Tom, still lying unconscious. "What about Tom? What are you   
going to do to him?"  
  
"He needs to stay here a little longer. If I were you, I'd   
worry about myself."  
  
B'Elanna was surprised to realize that she was on the verge   
of tears. She didn't even have the strength to resist the   
guards; she just let them lead her away. She couldn't   
believe how weak and pathetic she was being, but couldn't   
seem to help herself. She stumbled a little and one of the   
guards dragged her the rest of the way.  
  
"Why are they sending this one down here?" he grumbled.   
"She'll be lucky to last more than a day."  
  
The other guard shrugged. "One days work is better than   
none."  
  
She was dragged into a large darkened dormitory, where other   
prisoners were sleeping, and thrown onto the nearest empty   
bunk. By now she was feeling sick to the stomach and all she   
felt like doing was curling into a little ball and crying her   
eyes out.  
  
She sniffed a couple of times and suddenly there was a hand   
on her shoulder. "Lieutenant Torres? B'Elanna? Is that   
you?"  
  
B'Elanna looked up to see Ensign Palmer kneeling next to her   
bunk. "Janine!" she exclaimed, sitting up. "Is everyone   
else here?"  
  
"Everyone but Tom. We don't know where he is, but the other   
prisoners thought you'd both been taken to organ processing."  
  
B'Elanna nodded. "We were there. Tom still is."  
  
"Oh god! Does that mean that they've...?"  
  
"He's still alive. I don't know what they're doing to him   
though. You can see what they've done to me."  
  
Janine looked her over. "You look human."  
  
B'Elanna sighed. "I feel *so* sick. They told me that   
they've extracted all of my Klingon DNA. They're   
experimenting with it or something."  
  
"Hey, you," a guard suddenly called out and marched quickly   
over to Janine. "Get back to your bunk. You need to rest   
so that you can work a full shift in the tunnels."  
  
"All right, all right," she grumbled. The guard pushed her   
roughly onto her own bunk and then stared back over at   
B'Elanna. "That goes for you too."  
  
B'Elanna's heart beat furiously and she lay down quickly.   
Shutting her eyes she tried to do as she was told.  
  
******  
  
B'Elanna lay as still as she could, listening for any sign of   
movement. When she was sure that there was nobody in the   
room with her, she tried once again to free herself. She   
felt stronger now. Testing the locking mechanism that held   
her down, she concentrated on snapping it open. If she could   
just get one hand free, she'd kill the lot of them.  
  
The Klingon blood flowed strongly through her veins and she   
snarled in delight. She felt wonderful. Stronger than she   
ever had before. The Vidiians had no idea what they were   
dealing with. Somehow she would get free and then find the   
others. They were her responsibility. She was their leader.  
  
A sudden noise from the end of the room stilled her   
movements. "B'Elanna? How are you feeling today?"  
  
She turned to study the doctor who had done this to her. If   
she could just get him to trust her, she may find a way to   
escape. "I feel strong. It's very frustrating to be   
restrained like this."  
  
"I sympathize".  
  
"I don't like being chained up like an animal."  
  
The Vidiian shook his head. "I'm sorry. I wish there were   
some..."  
  
"I've been thinking about what you said," she interrupted   
him. "It's because of you, that I *am* Klingon and I *like*   
this feeling. In a strange way I suppose... I am grateful."  
  
As the Vidiian scientist leaned towards her, she continued.   
"Did you know that female Klingons are renown in the Alpha   
Quadrant, not only for their physical prowess, but also for   
their voracious... sexual... appetites as well." Sulan   
looked at her in surprise and she pressed her advantage,   
asking as she attempted to sit up, "Why not let your creation   
out of her harness? *Study* her in action." She smiled   
knowingly at him.   
  
The scientist found it difficult to speak. "I wish it were   
possible, B'Elanna," he said wistfully. "But I'm afraid I   
can't risk releasing you... just yet." He slowly reached out   
and stroked her face.  
  
B'Elanna steeled herself as the rotting, flesh eaten hand   
came towards her; but flinched nevertheless.  
  
Sulan jumped back as if he'd been burnt. "Forgive me."  
  
She tried to keep up the pretense. "For what?"  
  
"Please!" the Vidiian struggled to continue. "Don't   
condescend. I may have a grotesque appearance, but I assure   
you my instincts are finely honed. And I *do* have   
feelings."   
  
He came back to lean over her once again. "Hard as it may be   
for you to imagine, B'Elanna, my people were once handsome   
and vigorous, like yours. And with your help, we will be   
again. Perhaps, when that time comes, I will not disgust you   
quite so much as I do now."   
  
With that he walked away and B'Elanna lay still for a moment   
feeling a little guilty and more than a little sorry for   
these people. That didn't excuse what they did however.   
They were a dishonorable people and she would not help them   
willingly. With that thought she struggled harder to snap   
open the locking mechanism around her wrist.  
  
******  
  
Tom awoke to see another Viddian staring down at him. This   
was somebody different. "This face is very handsome. It   
will do nicely," the Vidiian stated.  
  
"Sulan! No... not this one. I've just spent a lot of time   
working on his hands. It would be such a waste."  
  
"Why did you do that in the first place, Saleem? Why waste   
time like that?"  
  
"It was a challenge. The nerves were destroyed. I wanted to   
see whether I could fix them."  
  
"And could you?"  
  
"I don't know yet. That's why I want to keep him a bit   
longer."  
  
"Well all experiments are important, of course, but mine must   
take precedent. B'Elanna finds it difficult to work with me,   
looking like this. This face would be perfect."  
  
Tom struggled to sit up. "You disgusting animals," he   
yelled. The Vidiian woman, Saleem injected something into   
his neck and he fell back down again.  
  
"I do not believe that this face would fit you very well,   
Sulan. Perhaps another of these humans has a better fit."  
  
"Very well, I'll see. But if not, I'll be back for him."  
  
Tom found that he could no longer stay awake and finally   
submitted to the darkness, hoping and praying that he would   
wake up again.  
  
******  
  
B'Elanna looked in shock at Pete Durst's features grafted   
onto Sulan's hideous face. She shuddered in revulsion.   
"Durst!"  
  
"I thought that perhaps this face might make you more   
comfortable with me," the Vidiian said with a smile.  
  
"You've killed him," B'Elanna ground out angrily.  
  
"Yes, B'Elanna, but his organs will save more than a dozen   
lives."  
  
B'Elanna growled in anger and with one final surge of   
strength managed to break free from the restraints holding   
her down. Sulan backed off in fear. Jumping off the bed   
quickly she grabbed Sulan around the neck, before he could   
get away, and squeezed with all her might.   
  
Sulan started to choke, but she didn't let go... she squeezed   
all the harder. This creature deserved to die. A sudden   
noise from the other room alerted her to the fact that   
someone was coming and she threw him away from her in   
disgust. She didn't want to get caught now that she was   
finally free. Hurrying from the laboratory, she wondered   
where the others were being kept. She had to find them and   
get them out of here, before what had happened to Durst   
happened to any more of them.  
  
******  
  
Tom woke up to the sound of alarms ringing and sat up slowly.   
He was still in the medical facility, but at least he was   
still alive. There was a mad scrambling going on in the next   
room, but before he could work out what was going on the two   
Vidiian doctors came back into the room. They were   
supporting the scientist named Sulan between them.  
  
"She tried to strangle me," he was gasping. "If you hadn't   
come in when you did, I'd be dead now."  
  
"Sit down and let us see to you," Saleem told him, running a   
regenerator over his bruised neck.  
  
Sulan shook his head in amazement. "Her strength is   
breathtaking. She is even stronger than we thought. A   
marvelous, marvelous creature. We must get her back. I   
cannot complete my work without her."  
  
"Don't worry, the guards will soon have her."  
  
"If she goes down into the tunnels it will be hard to find   
her."  
  
Tom listened in amazement. It sounded like B'Elanna had   
escaped. Hope surged through him. B'Elanna was still alive   
and with any luck she may find a way out of here and contact   
Voyager. He chuckled softly. "So B'Elanna got away from   
you, did she? What a shame."  
  
Sulan jumped up and glared at him angrily. "You shut up."  
  
Tom looked at him in horror. He'd just gotten a good look at   
his face. "P-Pete? Oh god! What have you done? OH MY GOD!!   
YOU ANIMAL!!!!" Tom struggled with all his might to get   
free, anger giving him extra strength. He wasn't locked in   
the way B'Elanna had been; his bindings weren't that strong.   
As one strap snapped, Saleem hurried over and injected him   
once more.  
  
"You'll have to go down to the tunnels. You can't stay here   
if you're going to cause problems," she told him. "I've done   
all I can anyway. I believe the surgery was a success."  
  
Surgery? What surgery? Oh god! What had she done to him?   
The blackness descended again as he was still trying to   
breathe.  
  
******  
  
"Tom! Tom! Wake up!" He turned over and groaned. Someone   
was shaking him, but all he wanted to do was sleep. He was   
so tired. Too tired to open his eyes. "Please, Tom!" The   
voice was soft, but urgent. He groaned again.  
  
"Leave me 'lone," he managed to mumble.  
  
"I'm so scared. Please, Tom! Wake up." The voice caught on   
a sob. "They're going to take me back to organ processing.   
I just know they are."  
  
It suddenly dawned on Tom that it was B'Elanna shaking him,   
but she sounded *so* different. Something tingled at the   
back of his mind. Hadn't she escaped? Oh no! They must   
have caught her again. He struggled to open his eyes.  
  
"B'Elanna?" he moaned.  
  
"Yes. It's me," she said breathlessly.  
  
Tom's eyes focused on her face, but something was different.   
She looked different. And it wasn't the fact that she was   
crying, although that fact was startling in itself. Her   
forehead was smooth. The Klingon ridges weren't there   
anymore.  
  
"What have they done to you?" he gasped as he managed to sit   
up.  
  
"They've made me human, Tom. I didn't think it was possible.   
But look at me."  
  
"How do you feel?" he asked as she dried her eyes.  
  
"Sick. And weak. So weak. I haven't any strength at all.   
If this is how humans feel, I don't know how you do anything.   
And I'm scared, Tom. Really scared. I've never been so   
scared in all my life."  
  
Tom nodded. "It's a pretty scary place." He ran his hands   
over his face and then checked his hands and arms.  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
Tom gave an embarrassed laugh. "Checking myself. They did   
something to me, but I don't know what. I know I had surgery   
of some kind. Do I look any different?"  
  
B'Elanna shook her head. "They wouldn't tell me what they   
were doing to you. But you still look the same."  
  
"They must have taken out one of my organs. It mustn't have   
been anything vital. I still feel the same." He ran his   
hands through his hair. "How'd you get caught?"  
  
B'Elanna looked at him in surprise. "They snuck up on us.   
We didn't even know they were there until it was too late."  
  
It was Tom's turn to look surprised. "No. I meant today.   
This morning. I know you escaped from the Lab. I was hoping   
you might find a way to contact Voyager."  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about. I was in the   
tunnels this morning. I couldn't work any longer, so they   
brought me back here to rest. When I woke up, you were here   
on this bunk."  
  
Tom looked at her in confusion. "But you were in the Lab   
this morning. With Sulan. You tried to strangle him."  
  
"God! What the hell have they been giving you? You must   
have been hallucinating."  
  
Tom shook his head stubbornly. "No. It happened. I didn't   
see you, but they were all talking about it. Sulan says he   
can't finish his work without you."  
  
"Tom! I wasn't there. I don't even know a Sulan. What's   
going on?"  
  
"I don't know. Sulan's a Vidiian scientist that's trying to   
find a cure for this phage. He seems to think that you can   
help." He screwed up his face as he tried to remember.   
"They told me that they were separating your genetic material   
so that they could work with you."  
  
"When I woke up they told me that they had extracted all of   
my Klingon DNA. Then they sent me down here. They told me   
that if I'm no stronger tomorrow, I'm going back to organ   
processing. I'm no use to them in the tunnels. I'm too   
weak. I've certainly never been in any lab or met this   
Sulan."  
  
"I'm not sure how or anything, but there must be two of you.   
It doesn't make sense otherwise. He was saying how strong   
you were."  
  
"Well that's certainly not me. You think they've made two of   
me? A Klingon me and a human me?"  
  
"I... I guess. I don't know. I don't know how it's   
possible."  
  
"I'm only half a person really. That's why I feel so bad."   
Tears rolled down her face. "They're animals. Experimenting   
on us."  
  
Tom swallowed. "I know. They've killed Pete."  
  
B'Elanna moaned. "They took him this morning. I was too   
scared to stop them. They've processed his organs?"  
  
"It's even worse than that. Sulan grafted Pete's face onto   
his. It's hideous. Sickening."  
  
B'Elanna rocked back and forth. "Oh god! What are we going   
to do? I'll be next. I'm getting weaker, Tom... not   
stronger."  
  
"It's all right, B'Elanna. I won't let them take you," Tom   
promised, although how the hell he could stop them he had no   
idea. He pulled her onto the bunk next to him and held her   
as she cried. He was becoming really worried about her.   
This wasn't like her at all.  
  
"I'm sorry," she sniffed suddenly. "I don't know what's   
wrong with me."  
  
He hugged her tightly. "It's all right. I'm scared too."  
  
"Maybe. But you're not letting it get to you the way I am."  
  
"Hey, give me time," he joked. "I could be under the bunk,   
bawling my eyes out in just a few minutes." When she didn't   
say anything, he sighed. "It's okay to be scared."  
  
"I've never been scared like this though, Tom. Never. I   
think they've turned me into some kind of coward. The   
strong, fearless me was the Klingon part of me and now that's   
gone."  
  
"B'Elanna, sometimes fear can be a good thing. It stops you   
from taking unnecessary risks. Courage doesn't mean you   
don't have fear. It means that you have learnt to overcome   
it. And I know you have the courage to hang on till we can   
get out of here. If there *is* another you running around   
somewhere, maybe she'll be able to get us out of here. We   
just have to stay positive." He squeezed her arm as tightly   
as he could.  
  
"T-Tom, you're hand is hurting me," B'Elanna stammered.  
  
"Oh god! Sorry." He hurriedly pulled away from her.  
  
"NO! You don't understand. Your hand. It squeezed. Hard.   
Really hard."  
  
Tom looked at her puzzled. "What do you mean?"  
  
"Give me your hands," she said excitedly. She squeezed them   
as tightly as she could. "Can you feel that?"  
  
Tom nodded. "A little."  
  
"Damn! If I only had my Klingon strength, you'd know what I   
mean." She suddenly grabbed one of his fingers and bit it as   
hard as she could.  
  
"Ow!!!! What'd you do that for? That hurt. That really...   
hurt." He looked at her in amazement "It... It stings." He   
said slowly. He curled his hands into fists and looked down   
at them in wonder. "I can really feel them. I mean   
properly." He jumped up off the bunk and wriggled his   
fingers. "I don't believe it. She said she was going to fix   
my hands, but I didn't know what she meant. I remember her   
saying that she had been working on them now. I didn't   
realize. Oh my god! She's fixed my hands."  
  
"Properly? Are they the same as they were before? Do they   
feel the same?" B'Elanna was as excited as he was.  
  
"I don't know. But they're better. Much, much better. She   
said she thought the surgery had been successful, but I   
didn't know what she was talking about."  
  
"Why would they do this, Tom? Why would they help you?   
We're just replacement parts to them."  
  
"She said it was a challenge. I guess she wanted to know if   
she could do it or not. They wanted me to work in the   
tunnels. I couldn't with my hands the way they were. Oh my   
god. B'Elanna! They've healed my hands." He laughed in   
delight and pulling her off the bunk spun her around the   
room.  
  
"Well, I'm glad to see you're both feeling better." Two   
Vidiian guards were standing behind them. "You can both get   
back down to the tunnels. There's work to be done."  
  
Tom cursed. "Of course, we have to get out of here if this   
is going to be good news."  
  
The guard eyed him suspiciously. "Get moving," he ordered,   
waving his phaser in the direction of the doors. Tom started   
to walk slowly forward, B'Elanna behind him, when the doors   
opened in front of him. He stopped in astonishment.   
B'Elanna stood there. At least, it was B'Elanna, but it   
wasn't. She was fully Klingon and growled as she took in the   
situation.  
  
"Paris, get out of the way," she snarled. Tom reacted   
instinctively, throwing himself sideways and pulling   
B'Elanna... the human B'Elanna with him. The guards stood in   
total shock, and before they could react the Klingon B'Elanna   
had charged, knocking them both to the ground. They were   
unconscious before they had even realized what was happening.   
  
Klingon B'Elanna helped human B'Elanna to her feet and they   
stood looking at each other for several seconds, before   
human B'Elanna fainted. Klingon B'Elanna caught her before   
she could hit the ground and threw her over her shoulder.  
  
She turned to Tom, who was still picking himself up off the   
ground. "You all right?" she asked gruffly.  
  
Tom shook his head. "No. I think I'm seeing double."  
  
B'Elanna growled in response. "Come on. We've got to get   
out of here. There will be more guards here any second."  
  
Tom nodded, still finding it hard to believe what was   
happening. "Wait. I'll just grab the guard's phasers. I   
think we might need them."  
  
"Hurry up!" B'Elanna made her way to the doors, still with   
her human counterpart slung effortlessly over her shoulder.   
Tom quickly picked up the two phasers and hurried after her.  
  
*****  
  
"There you go again. Out of control. Leaping into action   
without thinking things through."  
  
Tom sighed heavily, but didn't comment. He'd tried to   
intervene before only to have Klingon B'Elanna threaten to   
tear him limb from limb. He decided to let them argue, while   
he thought of a way out of here.  
  
Not that anything came to mind at the moment, and it was   
difficult to concentrate with the two of them arguing all the   
time. Human B'Elanna was right. They were arguing with   
themselves. If the situation weren't so serious, it'd be   
funny.  
  
They had to find Janine and Brian and then find some way to   
contact Voyager. He stood up suddenly and walked over to   
them. "At the risk of getting my head caved in... this isn't   
helping." Both B'Elannas turned to glare at him. "We have   
to work together. You know - teamwork. I don't know how   
long we'll be able to hide in these tunnels before they find   
us. We need to do something - now."  
  
"My point exactly," Klingon B'Elanna growled. "We should go   
and get the others from the tunnel they're in."  
  
"There are too many guards. We'll never get away," Human   
B'Elanna said at once.  
  
"We have weapons. We will kill as many as we can. I know we   
can do this. If you are too afraid, then stay here," Klingon   
B'Elanna practically spat the last bit.  
  
"I think Janine and Brian will be back in the prison barracks   
by now. I don't think we'll be able to get near them.   
They'll have guards everywhere," Tom said thoughtfully.  
  
Klingon B'Elanna looked at him carefully. "You are right,"   
she finally said.  
  
"We need to find a computer terminal," Human B'Elanna said   
then. "I may be able to find a way out of here."  
  
"Oh? How?" The question was a snarl.  
  
"Voyager must be looking for us by now. They would have   
beamed us out if they could. I think there must be some sort   
of forcefield around these tunnels, blocking the sensors.   
That's why we didn't pick up any of this before we beamed   
down."  
  
"If we can lower the forcefield, Voyager can get a lock on us   
and Janine and Brian too," Tom put in excitedly.  
  
"There was a security console in the lab where they were   
holding me," Klingon B'Elanna said slowly. "It's the last   
place they would think we would go."  
  
"Show us," Tom said in excitement.  
  
******  
  
Tom walked briskly down the corridor towards sickbay. His   
step was light and he wondered if anyone would mind if he   
danced the rest of the way. The Doctor had said that he   
could resume his normal shifts at the helm as soon as he was   
ready to, and Chakotay had already had him flying simulations   
in the holodeck. His response time was a little below   
average, but he knew it wouldn't take long until he was back   
to his normal self.   
  
His hands were completely healed. He still found it hard to   
believe. It was a dream come true for him and it was all   
thanks to the Viddians. His smile faded a little and his   
step faltered as he thought of Pete Durst. They had held a   
full military funeral for him the afternoon before, and Tom   
had stood up and said the eulogy. He hadn't really known the   
Lieutenant that well, but thought it was the least he could   
do under the circumstances.  
  
They had been lucky that he had been the only casualty in the   
end, although the Klingon B'Elanna had been killed also. The   
Doctor had been forced to replicate her Klingon DNA and   
reintegrate it back into the Human B'Elanna's cellular   
structure, when it became apparent that she could not survive   
without it. B'Elanna was now almost back to her old self   
again.   
  
He entered sickbay and smiled as he saw her sitting up on the   
biobed reading a data padd. "I bet that's something to do   
with your engines," he said teasingly.  
  
B'Elanna frowned up at him. "They're having a bit of a   
problem down there. Carey asked me to help."  
  
Tom held up his hand. "Spare me," he said with a laugh.   
"It's a wonder they didn't have your biobed wheeled down to   
engineering."  
  
"Well, I did ask the Doctor to let me out for a little while   
to have a look for myself, but he wouldn't let me."  
  
The EMH appeared around the doorway of his office.   
"Mr. Paris. It is not regular visiting hours."  
  
Tom looked over at him in surprise. "Regular visiting hours?   
Since when did we have set visiting hours, Doc?"  
  
"Since every Tom, Chakotay and Harry decided to visit Ms.   
Torres whenever they feel like it. There has been a steady   
stream of visitors the whole time she has been here."  
  
"And that's a bad thing?"  
  
"It interferes with the efficient running of this facility."   
There was a definite sniff in the EMH's voice.   
  
Tom laughed. "Come on, Doc. It's good for patient morale."  
  
"Patient morale is not my concern," the Doctor said huffily.   
"I leave that to Kes and yourself. Although, of course, now   
that you can return to the helm full time, I believe I will   
have to find a replacement field medic."  
  
"Um, that's why I'm here actually. I've already spoken to   
the Captain and Chakotay and they're agreeable. I'm only   
going back to the helm part time. I'll still be chief conn   
officer and everything, but the other pilots will be flying a   
lot of the time. I'll be on call for the tricky flying and   
training the others. I'm still your nurse/field medic. Part   
time anyway. You don't really need me in here full time   
anyway."  
  
"I see. Well it would have been nice to have been consulted   
about these arrangements," the EMH sniffed. "I am gratified   
that I do not need to train somebody else all over again, I   
suppose."  
  
"Well don't sound so enthusiastic, Doc. I thought you liked   
me."  
  
"You are a very annoying person, Mr. Paris. I am sure I have   
told you that before."   
  
Tom pretended to clutch his heart. "Doc! You wound me."  
  
The Doctor made a small harrumphing noise. "I suppose I can   
put up with you if I have to. Now, since you are here, you   
can get straight to work. The first order of business is a   
sponge bath for Lieutenant Torres."  
  
"What?" both Tom and B'Elanna said at the same time.   
  
B'Elanna, who had been listening to the conversation with a   
huge grin on her face, jumped off the bed in agitation.   
"There is no way in hell, *he* is doing that. I'm perfectly   
capable of bathing myself, thank you, Doctor."  
  
The Doctor smiled evilly. "Ms. Torres, I have found you to   
be a very troublesome, tiring patient. Please do not make   
the situation any worse."  
  
Tom turned on the EMH, his face a fiery red. "And this is   
your way of getting her back? And me too, I suppose?"  
  
The Doctor shrugged. "Your sense of humor has rubbed off on   
me, Lieutenant."  
  
"You are an evil, twisted man. And I love it," Tom laughed.  
  
The Doctor beamed. "Thank you. Now, carry on. I'll be in   
my office if you need me."  
  
Tom turned back to B'Elanna. "Well, you heard the Doc," he   
smiled.  
  
"Paris! You come one step nearer and I'll ... I'll... You'll   
be the one needing the biobed."  
  
Tom stepped closer.  
  
  
The End  
  
T'Pam   
December 1999. 


End file.
